harkkam Posted July 25, 2010 Posted July 25, 2010 Suppose there is one person that is with somebody for a year and after it ends they feel suicidal and extremely depressed and sad about it that it ended. Then there is another relationship that a person is with for five years does that relationship ending hurt the person more that the person who was with just for a year.
Treasa Posted July 25, 2010 Posted July 25, 2010 (edited) It really depends. My ex and I were together for six years. He broke up with me six times in those six years, most of them in the first year. I was extremely despondent every single time, thought I was suicidal, couldn't function until I got him back, etc. Finally something snapped inside me this last time he broke up with me, and I have no desire to ever be with him again, and it's only been two and a half months since the breakup. Some people here are grieving shorter relationships that ended three, five, 10 years ago. I choose not to. If he doesn't want me, ok, I'll move on with my life and do things that make me happy. I've chosen to look at the positives of no longer having him in my life. My world doesn't revolve around him anymore. It revolves around me. "They" say it takes half the length of time that you were with someone to get over that person. **** that. It's not going to take me three years to get over him. If I'm not *completely* over him by Halloween, I'll be very surprised. Edited July 25, 2010 by Treasa
spyyder Posted July 25, 2010 Posted July 25, 2010 Treasa's (above poster) situation is very different. She's broken up with her ex so many times that she eventually got use to it, realized that she doesn't need him and as she said...she snapped - this happens when one has had enough. Its also likely that every time she broke up, she subconsciously prepared herself a bit for the next time she gets broken up with. Time doesn't matter so much after you've passed the 1 year mark, as you should have had enough memories that would make it hard to move on. Perhaps the longer you've been together, the harder it is to get use to living without your ex.
Treasa Posted July 26, 2010 Posted July 26, 2010 Well, not exactly. The last time was the worst, and I tried to get him back for a month and a half until he said something very specific to me, which was what caused me to snap. The breakup didn't hurt any less, and I loved him more than ever. I also believed him when he said he'd never do it again. What a liar he turned out to be! I had to consciously make an effort to change, and it was hard, and it's a lot easier now. In fact, today marks one month of NC.
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