Gecko235 Posted July 22, 2010 Posted July 22, 2010 (edited) My ex's signals are all over the place. We dated for almost 4 years but had a very messy break up and finally started talking after 6 months. She says go left but her actions go right and my patience is wearing thin. I know at times she's trying to toy with me, get me jealous and stir me up. I use to just ignore it but now I've started saying something just as dumb/annoying as what she has said to me and she usually gets hurt and changes the subject. I've told her she's gotta be more polite or p*ss off (because she was being nothing but a bitch) and now she's sorta OK, but still playing games. But the reaction I get when I say certain things is she's hurt and its as if she likes me. Shes told me she doesn't have feelings for me anymore which I think she is lying (shes told me this as well as we will never get back together maybe 4-5 times), she's told me this after we broke up but ended up calling me 4 in the morning drunk as "did you f*** her did you f*** her" after she new I was going to the pub with a friend who was a girl. One time she told me we will never get back together and that we will never make out (lol but I never mentioned anything about making out). I've never taken what she says for what it is, I've always read her body language, what she says and how she says it. I can't work out whether she's toying with me (which to some point she's trying but I ain't reacting to) or has her guard/walls up. Ive missed her so much and just want the bullsh*t to stop. I'm seeing her for lunch this weekend and it would be a good way to suss her out, but as I said my patience is very thin now and I'm growing tired of the games. I'm doing the best to stay calm around her, trying not to snap at her as I did at times. Ive tried being honest with her but that gets me nowhere. There's more sh*t going on but I don't know what to think, maybe this is a way of venting lol. Btw I was getting prank phone calls for 6 months since we broke up on my mobile and home phone, but no way to prove it was her if it was. Edited July 22, 2010 by Gecko235
Argentina Posted July 22, 2010 Posted July 22, 2010 4 years is a long time to be with someone and understandably it is difficult to let go. However, in any relationship there needs to be firm boundaries. I don't know why she is acting like she does. There could be any number of reasons. The bottom line though is that it is unacceptable and you need to make this really clear to her. Toying with people's emotions is "game playing" and abusive behaviour. You are on the right track by indicating that you do not wish to buy into this game playing. You were with each other for 4 years and both of you should be comfortable enough to talk about real feelings. My thoughts are that if you go to lunch with her be very clear on what you want to get out of the time together. I think you have to be direct and if she starts the "game playing" you should warn her that it is not acceptable and if she does it again you should walk away. I don't know under what circumstances you broke up, but mutual respect, clear communication and no game playing is a perfectly reasonable expectation. Calling you up in the middle of the night is not acceptable and if she does this again you should tell her this and hang up the phone.
Author Gecko235 Posted July 23, 2010 Author Posted July 23, 2010 I know she has feelings for me even tho she says she doesn't. Its been 7 months since we broke up and just started talking again and its the same as before. Ive confronted her but I get no where. Its not me, I made mistakes like her, but I know its not me. Weve been txtin each other for about 5 hours argueing bahahaha and she says she doesn't have feelings for me. I think its good tho, getting things off our chest. I caught her in a lie and she's tried talking her way out and realized she couldn't then started to play games. God she's so pathetic and I have no idea why I'm so into her. What am I to do lol. I'm drunk and just havin a laugh telling her exactly wot I think ( some of the stuff I know she's lieing some stuff she possibly telling the truth its going on 6 hours and still going on strong, i think im gonna pass out before she does lol
Recommended Posts