Hopeful30 Posted July 22, 2010 Posted July 22, 2010 (edited) Next week I am flying out to meet my family in a vacation spot. My father had arranged for a family friend to drive me to the airport. When I had informed my boyfriend of this, he got very upset and lost his temper. He said that he should be my number one, and that I should have asked him first to drive me. I told him I didn't because I knew how important Sundays are for him (its the one day a week he gets to see his daughter). He should appreciate that I am not asking him to do me favours on the one day I know he always spends with his daughter. Instead he gives me grief and gets upset and angry and tells me "You have attitude and I don't like it". Wtf? Am I wrong to think he's being immature and unreasonable? I am leaving in a week, so it's not short notice. I still don't understand why he's upset? When I told him "Okay well I didn't know you would be able to drive me, would you please drive me to the airport?" His response? "No I don't want to anymore." Why is he being like this? P.S He's 32. Edited July 22, 2010 by Hopeful30
sugarmomma Posted July 22, 2010 Posted July 22, 2010 His feelings not to mention is ego is a bit bruised. I wish I had someone that wanted to be my number one. Awww. Hopefully he'll get over it.
collegeguy_24 Posted July 22, 2010 Posted July 22, 2010 He is being an ass and has control issues. It would be one thing if it was your ex driving you, but its not. Not to mention you told him you didn't ask so he could spend time with his daughter. He is completely in the wrong, and shows obvious signs of being a control freak, dump him and move on.
D-Lish Posted July 22, 2010 Posted July 22, 2010 I think he's angry you are leaving for a week and is searching for any reason to make an issue of it.
Author Hopeful30 Posted July 22, 2010 Author Posted July 22, 2010 I think he's angry you are leaving for a week and is searching for any reason to make an issue of it. Really? Hmm I never thought of that. Why would he want to create problems though? Wouldn't he want to make me miss him even more? Long story short, my parents don't approve of him, they really dislike him, could this be why he is insecure about me spending so much time with them? He even mentioned "Oh this family friend is probably some rich young boy your parents want to hook you up with so they're making him drive you."
Sabali Posted July 22, 2010 Posted July 22, 2010 How long have you two been going out? I agree that it is probably a bruised ego but why is your father arranging rides for you? Your BF is overreacting, especially since you asked him if he would take you. You didn't do anything wrong and he should just get over it. If he really wanted to be your number one, he would have accepted your request to allow him to drive you. He'll get over it.
Sabali Posted July 22, 2010 Posted July 22, 2010 Really? Hmm I never thought of that. Why would he want to create problems though? Wouldn't he want to make me miss him even more? Long story short, my parents don't approve of him, they really dislike him, could this be why he is insecure about me spending so much time with them? He even mentioned "Oh this family friend is probably some rich young boy your parents want to hook you up with so they're making him drive you." Oh. That is important info you left out. He is still overreacting but I understand him a bit more. He is feeling a bit insecure. You must come from a well-off family and he is probably blue collar. Huh?
OceanTropic Posted July 22, 2010 Posted July 22, 2010 (edited) He is acting stupid. Edited July 22, 2010 by OceanTropic
Author Hopeful30 Posted July 22, 2010 Author Posted July 22, 2010 Oh. That is important info you left out. He is still overreacting but I understand him a bit more. He is feeling a bit insecure. You must come from a well-off family and he is probably blue collar. Huh? Actually yes, that's the case. But it's never an issue in our relationship, the only time it's a problem is when family is mentioned. Otherwise its like this discrepancy doesn't exist.
Sabali Posted July 22, 2010 Posted July 22, 2010 He is acting stupid. My child, you are speaking through someone else's avatar. None of that excorcism stuff here. Give him a break and offer him some security if he is a good guy. If he regularly act like this, dump him. Of course you won't but you heard it here first.
D-Lish Posted July 22, 2010 Posted July 22, 2010 Actually yes, that's the case. But it's never an issue in our relationship, the only time it's a problem is when family is mentioned. Otherwise its like this discrepancy doesn't exist. Well, that actually IS an issue in your relationship. If he gets his back up everytime your family is mentioned- it's a problem.
Sabali Posted July 22, 2010 Posted July 22, 2010 Well, that actually IS an issue in your relationship. If he gets his back up everytime your family is mentioned- it's a problem. Words right out of my mouth.
Author Hopeful30 Posted July 22, 2010 Author Posted July 22, 2010 Give him a break and offer him some security if he is a good guy. If he regularly act like this, dump him. Of course you won't but you heard it here first. We have broken up numerous times before and somehow drifted back together, and yes the reason for breaking up was his behaviour. What kind of security can I possibly offer him? He already knows I don't care about money, and he has acknowledged this, yet for some reason he feels so threatened by my family. He tells me he only cares about what I think, not what my parents think, yet he makes such a big deal every time. I don't understand.
Sabali Posted July 22, 2010 Posted July 22, 2010 We have broken up numerous times before and somehow drifted back together, and yes the reason for breaking up was our differences. What kind of security can I possibly offer him? He already knows I don't care about money, and he has acknowledged this, yet for some reason he feels so threatened by my family. He tells me he only cares about what I think, not what my parents think, yet he makes such a big deal every time. I don't understand. Broken up numerous times? Anything else extremely important here that you are leaving out? I understand one break up, you may be able to twist my arm and make me believe in the second make-up but numerous is out of the question completely. The second break up is really. You can't offer him security. This won't work. See what that rich, young driver who is taking you to the airport is up to. Compatibility! It is of the single most important thing to get this plane off of the ground. Your family and your status is who you are and it doesn't meld with this guy!
Author Hopeful30 Posted July 22, 2010 Author Posted July 22, 2010 Broken up numerous times? Anything else extremely important here that you are leaving out? I understand one break up, you may be able to twist my arm and make me believe in the second make-up but numerous is out of the question completely. The second break up is really. You can't offer him security. This won't work. See what that rich, young driver who is taking you to the airport is up to. Compatibility! It is of the single most important thing to get this plane off of the ground. Your family and your status is who you are and it doesn't meld with this guy! So basically you are saying I need to dump him because our statuses are very different? I guess to an extent you are right, there will always be issues that will arise due to this....but its not enough of a reason. For the record, to put it nicely....this family friend is an old, very non-wealthy balding man lol
Sabali Posted July 22, 2010 Posted July 22, 2010 So basically you are saying I need to dump him because our statuses are very different? I guess to an extent you are right, there will always be issues that will arise due to this....but its not enough of a reason. For the record, to put it nicely....this family friend is an old, very non-wealthy balding man lol No, I am telling you to dump him because you are obviously not compatible, you have broken up numerous time and compatible couples don't do this, and he has a problem with your family and your family has a problem with him. He has a problem with you too because all of this is a part of you but you are denying that this. This dynamics are a part of you. Even if you told me nothing else in your post except you have broken up numerous times, that is enough right there. Stay with him all you want, just remember this thread after you two are married.
denise_xo Posted July 22, 2010 Posted July 22, 2010 Next week I am flying out to meet my family in a vacation spot. My father had arranged for a family friend to drive me to the airport. When I had informed my boyfriend of this, he got very upset and lost his temper. He said that he should be my number one, and that I should have asked him first to drive me. I told him I didn't because I knew how important Sundays are for him (its the one day a week he gets to see his daughter). He should appreciate that I am not asking him to do me favours on the one day I know he always spends with his daughter. Instead he gives me grief and gets upset and angry and tells me "You have attitude and I don't like it". Wtf? Am I wrong to think he's being immature and unreasonable? I am leaving in a week, so it's not short notice. I still don't understand why he's upset? When I told him "Okay well I didn't know you would be able to drive me, would you please drive me to the airport?" His response? "No I don't want to anymore." Why is he being like this? P.S He's 32. He's overreacting, it's not valid, and to me it would be totally unacceptable (especially at his age).
Sabali Posted July 22, 2010 Posted July 22, 2010 Hopeful, can you PM me. I don't believe I can PM you since I am new to the forum. We should discuss something, really. I don't think you want to discuss it here.
cdt76 Posted July 22, 2010 Posted July 22, 2010 He is offended that 1) another dude is driving you, 2) you never even asked him. I have two kids as well and it's not hard to take the child with you to drop you off at the airport. He's making a big deal out of it but he's jealous and upset. Try and talk with him. Oh and don't let another man drive you to the airport.
stace79 Posted July 22, 2010 Posted July 22, 2010 Really? Hmm I never thought of that. Why would he want to create problems though? Wouldn't he want to make me miss him even more? Long story short, my parents don't approve of him, they really dislike him, could this be why he is insecure about me spending so much time with them? He even mentioned "Oh this family friend is probably some rich young boy your parents want to hook you up with so they're making him drive you." 1. Yes, I think he overreacted. 2. I think the bold sentence above might indicate what his real problem is, and yes I think he might be irritable b/c he thinks your parents are trying to hook you up with someone else. 3. Something I have learned is that your family's opinion is actually pretty important. Maybe you should listen to them a little more.
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