bhobel123 Posted July 21, 2010 Posted July 21, 2010 My girlfriend moved to Seattle for a job and for the fact that we needed some space to figure things out. As soon as she left, i realized what the heck i just did and realized that I wanted to be out there with her making a life for myself and us. So I just recently went on a visit. the visit was amazing. we had an amazing time together: loving caring physical intimate! we had great sex, great fun, and really mutual connection like we were never apart. But she left me without an answer. She told me she needed some time to process things still and that she could not give me an answer at the time. At the same time she hinted on things about me being out there and was really happy that I was looking at schools there. She was happy I was making decisions for myself. SHe wants to see me happy with making decision for myself. RIght now she is in a place of content with herself and her move. She is not regretting anything, but wants things to work out. We told each other "i love you" a million times over the 4 days I was with her. We we very close and had a great connection. She needs her selfish time, but tells me at the same time its going to take time to work back to what we had. Since I left the visit, she has been texting a lot and talked on the phone a few times. and it has been very positive. So I went out there to visit, i went to visit schools, the city and her. She knows my intentions of moving out there for myself and for her. She knows that the Pacific Northwest is a good place for me and offers everything I love. She knows I want to be with her, and she knows I want to be out there with her. She knows my intentions of going back to school and being happy with my decisions i am making, which is why we kind of needed space in the first place, because I was not happy with the decisions I was making. So she knows that I want to make the move for myself, for school, for the city and the area, and her. she is the icing on the cake. I cant be with her if I move anywhere else. and it happens to be that Seattle is a good place for me as well. I think she is waiting to give me 100% til she knows I am for real about moving out there. I am going to go for it! This is the one for me and I need to make the effort. I should have moved with her in the first place, but things got screwy in my head. We are a good balance and a good match, its just I hit a bump and now she needs to protect herself. Any opinions or advice are appreciated!
DustySaltus Posted July 21, 2010 Posted July 21, 2010 I think that this has everything to do with her and nothing to do with you. If she calls you and tell you that she doesn't think she wants to be with you right now are you STILL going to move there? Be honest.
Author bhobel123 Posted July 21, 2010 Author Posted July 21, 2010 yes i am. seattle was a great town for me, and this school program is perfect for me. right now I believe everything just needs its space. like i said we had an amazing time together and she agreed. and the communication is flowing like the rivers. just have to keep it positive, and understand that I am going out there for myself, and she is there as well as icing on the cake. if she knows my intentions and everything about them, she will speak up and let me know!
Thorgs Posted July 21, 2010 Posted July 21, 2010 yes i am. seattle was a great town for me, and this school program is perfect for me. right now I believe everything just needs its space. like i said we had an amazing time together and she agreed. and the communication is flowing like the rivers. just have to keep it positive, and understand that I am going out there for myself, and she is there as well as icing on the cake. if she knows my intentions and everything about them, she will speak up and let me know! I love Seattle and Portland, but make sure 100% that you know you're gong for yourself. Imagine it this way, if she wasn't there and still lived near you, would you still go?
DustySaltus Posted July 21, 2010 Posted July 21, 2010 yes i am. seattle was a great town for me, and this school program is perfect for me. right now I believe everything just needs its space. like i said we had an amazing time together and she agreed. and the communication is flowing like the rivers. just have to keep it positive, and understand that I am going out there for myself, and she is there as well as icing on the cake. if she knows my intentions and everything about them, she will speak up and let me know! But why did it take a breakup to realize that Seattle was the place for you? If you thought that all along the breakup probably wouldn't have happened correct? I wish you the best but it just seems to me that this was a reactive response and not a proactive response.
Author bhobel123 Posted July 23, 2010 Author Posted July 23, 2010 the response has been both proactive and reactive. this is the girl i love, and it did take a big event for me to really realize that she is the person i really want to be with and have a life with, but it really kicked me in the ass. and that happens in life.sometimes you have to take risk, adn i think taking a risk with my own plan for my own life it worth it for this girl. we are still communicating everyday in some form or fashion.no arguments, good communication where she is interested in what i am doing and vice versa. Seattle has always been a place for me, and we discussed it as a couple, things in our relationship got a little distant and she took the opportunity to move for a good job, and now i am going to go for it!
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