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Who dates one at a time pre-committment?


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Posted
I meet people the same way, but I definitely date some of them fairly quickly. If we've never had sex, they can easily become friends later (many have). I've dated friends later. I always keep dating friendly in the beginning.

 

I think maybe your means of communication prompt you to do things differently than me. I have Facebook, but it's just to keep in touch with people who live far away. I don't IM except for work or as life actually requires. I don't really text except to arrange things. I give all my communication 100% of my attention or as close to it as I can, which means I prefer to spend time with people in person, or at the very least through phone/skype, or sometimes lengthy emails (like letters), if I'm away.

 

That's fair; I think we just do things differently. I don't date quickly, but in my view, acquaintances/friends can decide to date later, instead of the other way around. Either way is acceptable, just depends on what each individual's comfortable with. In case it wasn't clear, I wasn't attacking your method, just explaining how I personally manage to get to know someone and decide if there's a potential for a relationship without dating them first.

 

I like IM for keeping in touch with a wide range of people, both close friends and recent acquaintances, and planning events/get-togethers. I reserve personal time for those I'm already close to, excepting the aforementioned social events. I guess it's just different lifestyles.

Posted
So in the last few weeks I've been hanging out with this girl. I like her alot and today I asked her on a date (with success). However later in the day, she was making mention of another guy she has been dating for a little while (I know him through a mutual friend) WHILE she was on the date through text messaging.

 

As a bit of a rule for myself, I will only date one person at a time before it comes to making a exclusive commitment, and I will only date women who does the same (one, because of the factor of STD's if/when we have sex, two it makes me her sole focus rather than having to compete with others).

 

1. Do others solely date one person at a time?

2. Is it too much to seek only people who will date one person at a time?

2a. is it too much to ask the person who I'm going to date to only date me pre-commitment?

3. Am I crazy?

 

Thanks. :)

 

I only date one person at a time. Not into multi-dating or internet dating.

I prefer that the person I date be focused on learning about me, too, not off with other girls on other days of the week.

You might be crazy but this isn't why.

Posted (edited)

 

1. Do others solely date one person at a time?

2. Is it too much to seek only people who will date one person at a time?

2a. is it too much to ask the person who I'm going to date to only date me pre-commitment?

3. Am I crazy?

 

Thanks. :)

 

Just be aware i'm 38 & basically divorced & really really really enjoy not having to answer to anyone.

 

1. I prefer to do it that way just because I have kids & my free time is limited. But I also don't have to consider her when making MY plans (especially with other woman)

 

2. probably. like other's i've found that any attractive woman has at least one other guy on the line & you have to specifically ask them because they will not volunteer this info. some outright lie. Not really much I can do about it either other than put them on the same priority level as they ave placed me.

 

2a. Why would you? Let THEM bring it up & let them know it won't happen unless it's on your terms. (no other guys)

 

3. nope. old fashioned which isn't a bad thing.

Edited by phineas
Posted

If I am not seeing someone exclusively and seriously, then I'd go on dates with more than one person. But I wouldn't sleep with more than one at a time.

 

I think it was tacky of her to bring it up, but since is was the first time you'd asked her out and your first date with her, its hardly like she's cheating.

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Posted
I think it was tacky of her to bring it up, but since is was the first time you'd asked her out and your first date with her, its hardly like she's cheating.

 

I totally understand that, but I just thought it was poor judgment on her to tell me point blank. I decided that she isn't worth my time anymore and rescinded on my offer.

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