Gallaxia Posted July 21, 2010 Posted July 21, 2010 (edited) in general, online dating is worthless for most people Bingo! OP, it doesn't matter your race. You would be approached. But just know that OND is a business first. Online, at that. Their first priority is their bottom line aka "net income". Anything to drive up membership subscriptions. I've found that anyone who has truly found their SO and gotten married, through OND, is very very lucky. Edited July 21, 2010 by Gallaxia
Author AutumnWinterLover Posted July 21, 2010 Author Posted July 21, 2010 Because it's a dating site. You're not going to get any dates without pictures of yourself and people knowing things about your appearance. Exactly! I dont know what that guys problem is. Also people also CLEARLY define what race/ethnicity they are interested in dating. Thanks Enchanted Girl.
USMCHokie Posted July 21, 2010 Posted July 21, 2010 I don't know you're pretty jacked and in the marines, that might counter balance the other stuff to some extent, but I don't know just how far you would get in online dating. Not saying that to put you down btw, I won't even look at online dating from how much it would nuke my self-esteem. Heh, I wasn't being serious...I guess my post was missing one of these:
tincanman99 Posted July 21, 2010 Posted July 21, 2010 Dont get down. Realize that online dating is all about numbers and $$. Thats all. People that are online dating sites tend to be a lot pickier than they ever would be in real life. You are a woman and alive so you have that going on . I would do it anyway. Though there will be some guys that dont like black women, lots will though. It all depends on you and how you come off on the ad. Every woman I know said dating online is like shooting fish in a barrel. All get tons of responses. Just realize you will encounter freaks, sex hounds and weed them out. I am a white guy and would date black women. Not all guys dont like black women.
jamesum Posted July 21, 2010 Posted July 21, 2010 Dont get down. Realize that online dating is all about numbers and $$. Thats all. People that are online dating sites tend to be a lot pickier than they ever would be in real life. Thats so true. There is a different feeling between taking interest in a person based on pictures only and actually meeting the person in real life.
Gallaxia Posted July 22, 2010 Posted July 22, 2010 Humanity never ceases to amaze: All these years of people complaining about racial bias and practicing racial bias intermittently, and then Al Gore invents the internet, where nobody knows what color or race you are, and the first thing you want to do is broadcast it to the world. Um, not to go off topic, but Al Gore did not invent the internet. That's an urban legend that spread like wildfire. It was Tim Berners-Lee. Sorry that's just a pet-peeve of mine. OP- Realistically, You do whatever makes YOU happiest.
mattyb123 Posted July 26, 2010 Posted July 26, 2010 I'm a black woman in my mid 20s and I was browsing on match.com, I'm not too sure I want to subscribe to the site though. I saw several matches that I was interested in, but when I looked on their profile I saw they wanted to date everything, but a black woman. Even the black men didnt want to date a black woman. I happen to like all ethnicities and I'm wondering is online dating more difficult for black women? I even read an article one time that said that black women got the least responses on dating websites. Should I just not bother with online dating at all? I don't know what to tell you. Black Women are on the bottom of Sexual Value Totem Pole. As a group black women are unattractive. Case in point, I just got back from Publix (Grocery Store) in Fort Lauderdale, FL. There must of been 40-50 women in there. And about 8 out of the 10 black women in there were obese and ugly. This is not an isolated incident. In the clubs, most black women are fat single moms, where are the Megan Tandys'?
SassyKitten Posted July 26, 2010 Posted July 26, 2010 Online dating is all a numbers game, the more people you put yourself out to, the better. And it's not about getting as many responses as possible, it's about getting that one quality response. Good luck!
nikayla Posted July 26, 2010 Posted July 26, 2010 I urge you to read the following link from Atlantic monthly. It is written by Ta-Nehisi Coates, focusing on dating prospects for black women in the online community. http://www.theatlantic.com/culture/archive/2010/03/the-black-damsel-in-dating-distress/37085/ I am a black female who met my boyfriend through online dating. In fact, I received close to 50 e-mail prospects per day. No, I'm not lying. They key to my success was originality. Unfortunately, many stereotypes are half-truths and it easy for anyone to be defined through them. I avoided infamous 'booty shots' or slang. I detailed my unique interests, including yoga, Japanese culture, and architecture. I marketed myself as someone cultured, yet unpretentious; fun, yet serious. After a while, guys became approachable on the sites. I transformed from a black girl to a girl who happened to be black. Best of luck to you!
Feelin Frisky Posted July 26, 2010 Posted July 26, 2010 ... I transformed from a black girl to a girl who happened to be black... Excellent insight. I think that is pretty much THE issue especially now with the way hip hop music or rap pseudo-culture along with so much media over-exposure has created a situation where instead of black people stuggling against the stereo-type there seems to be a strong willingnesss to aspire to the stereo type instead of dispelling it. Thinking of it the way you expressed it simplifies your astutness and honesty which for any thinking man, helps him know right away that your not a card board cutout of "blackness" but instead your own person, devil be damnned. Me likey.
Untouchable_Fire Posted July 27, 2010 Posted July 27, 2010 I am a black female who met my boyfriend through online dating. In fact, I received close to 50 e-mail prospects per day. No, I'm not lying. They key to my success was originality. Unfortunately, many stereotypes are half-truths and it easy for anyone to be defined through them. I avoided infamous 'booty shots' or slang. I detailed my unique interests, including yoga, Japanese culture, and architecture. I marketed myself as someone cultured, yet unpretentious; fun, yet serious. After a while, guys became approachable on the sites. I transformed from a black girl to a girl who happened to be black. Best of luck to you! Are you suggesting that guys actually read profiles?
Asami Posted July 27, 2010 Posted July 27, 2010 Online dating is all a numbers game, the more people you put yourself out to, the better. And it's not about getting as many responses as possible, it's about getting that one quality response. Good luck! very true. I am on a dating site, currently and I'm shocked by the responses I've recieved from guys who were interested, I've always been told that white guys do not find black omen attractive.
Sanman Posted July 27, 2010 Posted July 27, 2010 Nikayla, That was a very interesting article in the Atlantic. Though, in my experience, those that use ethnic oriented dating sites tend to be more conservative with regard to values (at least the ones I joined). This might lead to more dates, many of them may not be so compatible if you have liberal values. The quandry I often find myself in...liberal women of my ethnicity tend to date white men/other ethnicities and more conservative women tend to stick to their own. What is a liberal ethnic person to do if they would like to date within their ethnicity?
alexlakeman Posted July 27, 2010 Posted July 27, 2010 Black women should just stop crying the racist flag and move on... It's the same on anything back people don't succeed at, throw out the "minority" flag... bs...
nikayla Posted July 27, 2010 Posted July 27, 2010 Are you suggesting that guys actually read profiles? Hmm....didn't think about that one. On that note, ladies, screw the profiles and con the men with Photoshop, jk. I actually know a few men who will not go on dates without video chatting. Me thinks a whole of women are too good with photo editing.
nikayla Posted July 27, 2010 Posted July 27, 2010 What is a liberal ethnic person to do if they would like to date within their ethnicity? I believe that the best place to find women with your same interests is to join groups and become innovative, with respect to the local demographic. For example, I currently live in New Hampshire- a state that does not represent many ethnic groups. I mostly meet liberal men of similar cultural backgrounds by attending cultural association conferences, ethnic holidays, sports events, churches, and-of course-universities. My suggestion is find out where the ethnic group is mostly situated where you live. Are they concentrated in a larger neighborhood or city nearby? Do you have contacts in those areas? Once you establish where your target is, then you can weed out the available prospects (i.e. via friends and family, online dating, bars and lounges, etc.) to find someone liberal. Although I understand you prefer someone of your ethnicity, why not try dating someone of a slightly familiar cultural background? I learned so much about the Afro-Caribbean culture from an ex of Haitian descent. Best of luck!
Rifareal Posted July 27, 2010 Posted July 27, 2010 First of all theres nothing wrong in being black. I am not black but i would go to date anyone. Physical attributes only attracts me at first, but the larger and most important picture is the character of the person and how you get along with each other. Don't let others make you feel down. Hope this helps.
Sanman Posted July 27, 2010 Posted July 27, 2010 I believe that the best place to find women with your same interests is to join groups and become innovative, with respect to the local demographic. For example, I currently live in New Hampshire- a state that does not represent many ethnic groups. I mostly meet liberal men of similar cultural backgrounds by attending cultural association conferences, ethnic holidays, sports events, churches, and-of course-universities. My suggestion is find out where the ethnic group is mostly situated where you live. Are they concentrated in a larger neighborhood or city nearby? Do you have contacts in those areas? Once you establish where your target is, then you can weed out the available prospects (i.e. via friends and family, online dating, bars and lounges, etc.) to find someone liberal. Although I understand you prefer someone of your ethnicity, why not try dating someone of a slightly familiar cultural background? I learned so much about the Afro-Caribbean culture from an ex of Haitian descent. Best of luck! I to date individuals of similar or non-similar cultures. It is a compromise I choose to make rather than dating mostly conservative women of same culture/ethnicity. However, it can make things more difficult with family. Just something that must be navigated when one is not of the majority culture/ethnicity.
Untouchable_Fire Posted July 27, 2010 Posted July 27, 2010 Hmm....didn't think about that one. On that note, ladies, screw the profiles and con the men with Photoshop, jk. I actually know a few men who will not go on dates without video chatting. Me thinks a whole of women are too good with photo editing. This is going to sound weird, but when I was online dating, I actually dated a few women without ever seeing a photo. Honestly... I don't put any value in those photos anyway. Even if it's 100% true... it's still a best case scenario in my opinion. I've met enough people that looked terrible in photos but good in real life... and vise-versa that I just go off personality and other items.
zengirl Posted July 27, 2010 Posted July 27, 2010 (edited) I have pretty good photos (or so I've been told; and I certainly was always contacted enough, by some decent fellows as well as the losers) on the online dating sites I've been on. But I definitely look better in person (or on video; or anywhere where I don't have to stand and pose, unnaturally). At any rate, these kind of guys I actually know a few men who will not go on dates without video chatting. Me thinks a whole of women are too good with photo editing.always made me chuckle derisively. It was a great way to get written off. And I'm sure they wondered why I never replied again, but they don't even get the courtesy of a "No thanks" after being that shallow. You know the guys: The "send another picture, no another one. . . " or apparently, now, it's video chat with a girl. Those guys are too shallow to bother with. I expect a fellow to want to like how I look, but the pictures on any site -- if there are at least 2 or 3 -- should be a good enough shorthand. Meet the girl for some coffee to see the rest. Seriously. . . what is coffee? That's half an hour and $5. ($10 if you actually spring for the girl's coffee.) I'd never pester a guy for more pictures. He either has enough to interest me clearly, or he doesn't, and it's a moot point. Not to de-rail the thread! I've no idea how black women fair online. I've noticed there don't seem to be nearly so many black fellows on the dating websites, as white in my old area (I'm white/Japanese mix) or new area (not counting Korea where there are none, because so few non-white foreigners come here). It seems like there are the least amount of black guys, as I don't filter by ethnicity, and almost everybody is white, a few Hispanics, and an Asian or two. Almost no black guys. I wonder why this is? I know why the Asian numbers are low (culturally, in Asian families, online dating in the U.S. would be totally taboo. . . ironically, it's less taboo for Asians. . .well, Koreans. . . in Korea, I've noticed; figure that one out?). Edited July 27, 2010 by zengirl
Peter Attis Posted July 27, 2010 Posted July 27, 2010 Black women should just stop crying the racist flag and move on... It's the same on anything back people don't succeed at, throw out the "minority" flag... bs... http://img829.imageshack.us/img829/6720/facepalmy.jpg You can always expect the most... interesting of opinions on LoveShack...
Gallaxia Posted July 28, 2010 Posted July 28, 2010 Black women should just stop crying the racist flag and move on... It's the same on anything back people don't succeed at, throw out the "minority" flag... bs... Duuuude! You had better be a minority to even make a comment like that. Often times you see that the people affected the least, make the most generalized of statements. Good Lord!
SassyKitten Posted July 28, 2010 Posted July 28, 2010 Alexlakeman - Not cool at all. Generalisations are a sign of exasperation of the narrow-minded and dim-witted. Personally, I wouldn't go on a date with anyone I haven't done video chat with first. Mainly because in my experience, people can be so diferent from their photos as far as the whole package goes, but video doesn't lie.
Untouchable_Fire Posted July 28, 2010 Posted July 28, 2010 Alexlakeman - Not cool at all. Generalisations are a sign of exasperation of the narrow-minded and dim-witted. Personally, I wouldn't go on a date with anyone I haven't done video chat with first. Mainly because in my experience, people can be so diferent from their photos as far as the whole package goes, but video doesn't lie. I usually screen based on personality first.... then I give her a shot in person. I've only been burned like that twice... out of many times. I think your doing it the wrong way.
SassyKitten Posted July 28, 2010 Posted July 28, 2010 Untouchable - I'm not even doing online dating for now anyway, or dating at all! But then again I'm leaving Georgia as soon as I've saved up money so there's no point, as I don't do casual relationships.
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