melowoman Posted July 19, 2010 Posted July 19, 2010 So I had sex with my ex-husband this weekend. It was great ( I missed him) but hard to deal with emotionally. I don't want to be the OW. It feels worse than being the wife with a cheating husband. Do I want him back? Did I do it to get back at his wife who was the former OW? I don't know where to go from here. Does anyone have any experiences to share?
2sure Posted July 19, 2010 Posted July 19, 2010 Unless you somehow let his new wife know it happened - no, you didnt do it to get back at her. As to you where you go from here...I think this is a fairly common occurrence - people have sex with their exes, sometimes for closure but more often just because its a familiar sexual outlet. Obviously, not a good idea unless you walk away saying it wasnt worth it. When infidelity was the cause of the break, the BS does it just to prove there wasnt really anything wrong with themselves and the WS does it just because divorced or not - they still want the opportunity for both, or because they realized the grass wasnt as green as they thought. Where do you WANT this to go? To me, over should be over and if you continue ...its just relentless.
bentnotbroken Posted July 19, 2010 Posted July 19, 2010 So I had sex with my ex-husband this weekend. It was great ( I missed him) but hard to deal with emotionally. I don't want to be the OW. It feels worse than being the wife with a cheating husband. Do I want him back? Did I do it to get back at his wife who was the former OW? I don't know where to go from here. Does anyone have any experiences to share? I don't know if you did it to get back at her, but why did you go there? He is married...right? Not cool.
Snowflower Posted July 19, 2010 Posted July 19, 2010 So I had sex with my ex-husband this weekend. It was great ( I missed him) but hard to deal with emotionally. I don't want to be the OW. It feels worse than being the wife with a cheating husband. Do I want him back? Did I do it to get back at his wife who was the former OW? I don't know where to go from here. Does anyone have any experiences to share? Only you can answer these questions: no one else can answer this for you. I'm assuming your ex has remarried. If this is the case, then yes, you are the OW at least in some form. But why does that matter? It also complicates the situation since you and he were also married at one time. Like another poster said, it is common for ex-spouses to have sex long after the divorce. Think long and hard about why you decided to sleep with your XH. What did/do you want from this relationship now?
cavedweller Posted July 20, 2010 Posted July 20, 2010 Why would you waste your time with your ex-husband? Move on and get a life.........
NoIDidn't Posted July 21, 2010 Posted July 21, 2010 This reminds me of "Its Complicated". Its actually very common. You'll likely move on and leave him to his mess, like most others do. You got to see for yourself it really wasn't the OW that was the main problem. It was him! He's already doing it to her.
cavedweller Posted July 21, 2010 Posted July 21, 2010 My ex-wife (she was married to the OM) wanted to 'hook up'...I told her no.. You need to forget him and move on..
Woman In Blue Posted July 21, 2010 Posted July 21, 2010 Are you trying to tell me that his OW-turned-wife is not his soulmate like she'd thought she was? LOL. What's that expression again? Oh yes..if they'll cheat WITH you, they'll cheat ON you. Guess new wife will finally get to see that first-hand. I actually find the whole thing quite amusing. But your ex-husband is a pig because he can't seem to keep his pants zipped no matter WHO he's married to.
Crow9726 Posted July 21, 2010 Posted July 21, 2010 I see where posters are veering toward talking about your ex-husband and how bad of a person he is. So...for something different...I'll reply to your question. Yes...you are the OW. You are knowingly having sex with a married man. Regardless of your past with him...you are helping him cheat on his new wife. Cut and dried...no doubts...you are the OW now.
bentnotbroken Posted July 21, 2010 Posted July 21, 2010 I see where posters are veering toward talking about your ex-husband and how bad of a person he is. So...for something different...I'll reply to your question. Yes...you are the OW. You are knowingly having sex with a married man. Regardless of your past with him...you are helping him cheat on his new wife. Cut and dried...no doubts...you are the OW now. Can't get any simplier than that.
scatterd Posted July 21, 2010 Posted July 21, 2010 let someone else be the other woman he just proved you are willing to do the same thing as the other woman.Don't do it again because you are better then that.Tell him it was a mistake and find someone to have sex with thats worth it.Good luck
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