Sent email

[ResetReality]

After one month of NC, I sent an email

 

I told her that after all that has happened I have come to terms what has happened, That I realize that we can never be and that I will cherish the good times we had,

 

I went on to say that, ive tried being bitter, cold, angry, but i just cant

 

we had a lot of awesome times, and some really nice memories which I will always cherish, and that hopefully sometime in the future we can re write some new ones

 

I wish her the best and said, I just wanted her to be happy, regardless if it is with me or anyone else, be happy is all i can say.

 

 

 

and tbh, I feel so much better after sending it, it was more like closure for me, I sent the email to get it all of my chest. and it has worked, i feel at peace, and feel i can finally look to the future

 

but she hasn't replied, but then again, its not why i sent it, i guess i sent it more for me

[hopesndreams]

You wanted a response, that's why you sent it. It was another effort, by you, to get her back. She knows this.

 

Next time, write down what is on your mind, but do not send it to her. Go NC.

 

If she does respond, do not respond back.

[ResetReality]

I know where you are coming from, but I honestly believe that I had enough with the pain and Im ready to move on,

 

why send it in the first place?

 

a kid i went to school with ended up getting stabbed last week and died, at that point I realized that no matter what i'm going through i couldnt help but feel selfish, there was me, crying over a girl, and there was his parents crying over losing their son,

 

life it was too short, and i couldnt hold grudges, which triggered me to send this email, she can take it however she wants, she should of got the idea that im over her and i dont want to be bitter,

 

if she takes it like i want her back, then i guess shes getting too big headed and needs to step down from her high horse

[Dressagechick]

I don't think sending a closure e-mail necessarily is seeking a response. I did it - and then went NC, which I haven't felt compelled to break. In fact, I specifically said: "No need to reply" in my e-mail. There's nothing he can really say at this point, so unless it's an unequivocal (emphasis added) "I made a mistake, I'm so sorry, and I'm going to take the following affirmative steps to move forward," I'm not interested, as much as I love him. (And even then, I may not be interested. It's my own personal emotional makeup, but I can't have someone who bails over nothing really. I always think: "What happens when something REALLY bad happens?!" Good grief!)

 

There was, however, some things that I wanted to say, so I said them. It was very kind. It was for me, not him.

 

I also believe that, well, who cares what someone else thinks about it really? So, maybe he sat there and thought, "Oh see...she still LOVES me! Even though I broke up - sort of. Go me! (yay?)" I don't really pay much attention to the question of "power" in relationships, so he can think whatever he wants about why I sent it! That's on him, not me! I think if taking action x, y, or z sets back healing, then don't do it. Otherwise, who cares?

 

Reset - if it made you feel better and perhaps take a step forward, good for you!