qinboxmail Posted July 17, 2010 Posted July 17, 2010 I've been with my girlfriend for three years. She then say that when she's with me she doesn't have any feeling toward me (like few months ago). What is funny is that she and I have been talking about the engagement and wedding. Why would she talks about wedding when she doesn't have any feeling for me ? I just don't understand. I went to her house to apoligize what I've done to make her hurt and not not there when she needed me. I asked her give me an opportunity to fix it and she said no. She tells me she's holding firm to her decision and I should respect her. She closes the door on me and threaten to call the police if I bother her family. She's mad. Now the question is. Should I leave her sometimes like 1 week to 1 month for her to think it over ? Would she changed her mind ? Or it's over for real ?
Feelin Frisky Posted July 17, 2010 Posted July 17, 2010 You've been kicked to the curb ol' buddy. I can't tell whose fault that is but threatening you with Johnny Law should be enough to tell you to start getting over her and accepting it's finished. You're attempts at applying logic to what seems like an illiogical thing acts like fly paper and keeps you trapped. I advise never, ever contacting her again (and tell her to eff off if she calls you and hang up.)
carhill Posted July 17, 2010 Posted July 17, 2010 I went to her house to apologize what I've done to make her hurt and not not there when she needed me. This sounds vague. Can you be more specific about her 'reasons'? My first instinct, absent you being psychotic (and, hence, her being justified in her response), is that her overreaction to your visit by using verbiage like 'threaten to call the police if I bother her family' tells me she's probably involved with another guy and there's no defense like a good offense. Sorry. When she told you she had no feeling for you a few months ago, that likely was well after the beginning of whatever she is doing now. After three years, if she gives up on your relationship (potential marriage) that easily, it's actually really good information. She's not the one for you. My advice would be to accept her response as her truth at this time. My sympathies...
Author qinboxmail Posted July 17, 2010 Author Posted July 17, 2010 This sounds vague. Can you be more specific about her 'reasons'? My first instinct, absent you being psychotic (and, hence, her being justified in her response), is that her overreaction to your visit by using verbiage like 'threaten to call the police if I bother her family' tells me she's probably involved with another guy and there's no defense like a good offense. Sorry. When she told you she had no feeling for you a few months ago, that likely was well after the beginning of whatever she is doing now. After three years, if she gives up on your relationship (potential marriage) that easily, it's actually really good information. She's not the one for you. My advice would be to accept her response as her truth at this time. My sympathies... When she's sick I didn't bring food over to her house. I mean sometimes I do. She expects me to do it all the time. She tells me to ask her parents how they're doing when I come over. Yes, I know it's my fault and I should have made the relationship better. I should have treated her better and change myself.
carhill Posted July 17, 2010 Posted July 17, 2010 Oh, I remember your other thread... Yes, definitely leave her alone. After a few months of NC, when your head has cleared, assess your own behaviors and work on yourself as appropriate before dating again. BTW, you never answered my question about whether *she* cared for you when you weren't feeling good or seemed concerned about how your parents were feeling/doing. That kind of balance (or lack of) is telling. Good information for the future. Good luck
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