SassyKitten Posted July 16, 2010 Posted July 16, 2010 I'm about to meet the guy who I think is everything I've been looking for in exactly 19 days now. I'm excited, but also more nervous each day closer to my flight that I get. Any stories of meeting your significant other, advice, inspiration, anything to help me?
habs53 Posted July 16, 2010 Posted July 16, 2010 Well sort of. I will be meeting a woman in Sept. We knew each other around 13 years ago. We have a bond now that is amazing. We know what each other looks like from memorys and recent pictures. Still im very nervous and she said the same. I was told from someone to have things planned before you go. That way you wont just sit there and have no idea what to do. Kinda breaks the ice like go to a museum or something.
carvidep Posted July 17, 2010 Posted July 17, 2010 The planning idea is a good one. When I met mine the first time romantically we met in NYC where neither of us lives, so he created a googlemaps map that we could both log into and mark places that we wanted to go. Maybe you could create one of Hawaii and show your SO things that you'd like to see there, and he can give you the "yay" or "neigh" on those. This was a great way to ease a bit of the anticipation, but it also got me all excited again. I'd recommend getting out of the house and doing something you enjoy to keep your mind off of it for some part of the day. This will help you mentally relax and put those jitters aside for a bit. It also helped me to keep my expectations low, just in case things didn't work out the way I wanted. But he ended up very much exceeding any expectations I had before! I'm super excited for you!! 19 is my lucky number, so I'm gonna pass that luck on over to you.
Els Posted July 17, 2010 Posted July 17, 2010 I hope you guys don't mind me veering offtopic a little... But how DO you show someone a marked google map (short of screenshotting it?) The URL just doesn't retain the marks..
aerogurl87 Posted July 17, 2010 Posted July 17, 2010 Aww hope it goes well for you. I met my SO in person after dating for almost 4 months entirely online, about 2 months ago. I wasn't even nervous about meeting him, I was more worried about not bringing everything I needed with me to the airport like my passport. And when I got to the airport I was greeted by rain that messed up my hair, a handsome guy with the bluest eyes I'd ever seen, and a ride to Walmart to pick up some much needed gummy worms. I ended up having the best two weeks of my life so far. I agree with carvidep on trying to have some things planned out before you get there. My SO and I had planned on me going to his graduation first of all, that was the biggest thing. Then my boyfriend planned other stuff for us to do like go out to eat, go by this dream home open house thing they were having, and just lots of random sightseeing. Everything else was either open or not planned, like the one day where they got about a foot of snow in the end of May.
carvidep Posted July 17, 2010 Posted July 17, 2010 I hope you guys don't mind me veering offtopic a little... But how DO you show someone a marked google map (short of screenshotting it?) The URL just doesn't retain the marks.. If any of you ever want to use this helpful tool on the google maps site there's a "my maps" link. if you click that there will be another link "create new map". It should save your marks there.
Author SassyKitten Posted July 17, 2010 Author Posted July 17, 2010 I did make some suggestions of some things I would like to do today like maybe find a good museum or 2 to stroll through, camping on the beach, etc. He's more of the expert as he's lived there for almost 4 years, and seems very excited about planning some things. Besides activities though, the expectations thing is a huge one for me. I'm a huge planner who thinks a lot about my future, making it an interesting dynamic in my first and hopefully only long-distance online relationship. With what I've seen so far, he inspires me, makes me laugh, and is one of the few people out there who thinks like I do. All the while we haven't met in person just yet, and while from our Skyping I'm 95% sure that he is everything I could ever hope for, there is still a chance that the real him isn't what I imagined. And I suppose there's also a huge part of me that may think that he may think I'm disappointing in person compared to what I'm like long distance. I'm just trying to get myself into that mindset to where I can walk off that plane unafraid.
Spiritofnow Posted July 18, 2010 Posted July 18, 2010 (edited) Hey, Sassykitten, I have read your posts and I am glad to see that the count down is nearing. I met my bf on-line two and a half years ago. We met in a research forum and neither of us were looking for a relationship - we just clicked. A year after talking online and establishing exclusivity to one another we met. He flew over from the states to Britain. I was sure that the chances of our meeting not going well were very slim due to how well we got on (my intuition just told me everything was going to be fine), and I was correct. I was sooooooo nervous meeting him at the airport, but we just seem to fit together instantly. The on-line relationship had enabled us to get to know each other on a very deep level and it was a success. We just went with the flow on that first meeting, because just being together after all that time was the most important thing for us - we hung out at coffee bars, went for lunch, strolled along the river and allowed ourselves to get to know each other in a more 'real' way. I did wonder whether he would find me as attractive in real life....I had lots of fears about how the dynamics of real life would feel, but I never let that stop me. I am flying out there in 6 days for my second visit to him. It can and does work out - I don't know how I would have felt if the chemistry wasn't there, because although I did consider it I just never felt it would be an issue. Maybe I am fortunate, but I would say that listening to your gut instincts will tell you a lot about how it may go. I think the fact that we didn't meet until a year after our on-line relationship may have also helped us out. Good luck with it...I will watch this space to see how it all goes. Edited July 18, 2010 by Spiritofnow
Gugga Posted July 18, 2010 Posted July 18, 2010 Hi I met my man on Facebook 2 years ago, and I being in Iceland and he being in the US it was quite the challenge but after a year of talking,skyping etc I decided to take the plunge and go see him.. after my 6h flight I was so nervous and anxious but when I saw him and we hugged and kissed it was like we'd known each other forever and the 10 days I spent with him never felt awkward or weird, just felt like it was meant to be! I just came back from being with him for 2 months and now he's coming over here to meet the family and after that I'm moving over! it's a fairytale come true!!! So I say go for it you never know
Author SassyKitten Posted July 18, 2010 Author Posted July 18, 2010 Spirit - One way I can say that starting out long distance is a mixed blessing is that somehow it feels lore like you have nothing to lose if you act completely like yourself around someone so quickly. My guy and I have shared so many things with each other that neither of us probably would've dared to this soon had it been a conventional relationship. Actually, something that I thought for a while was about to rip us apart was some trust issues I have when it comes to men. He seemed patient with me on these, but I could tell that it was getting to him. Then recently I shared with him the full reasons why I have these trust issues, and I feel like it has brought us so much closer. In any case, having the wall between you before you're capable of having sex definitely works wonders when it comes to getting to know the person, as much as it can drive you crazy! Everyone, good luck and thanks for sharing. I feel very optimistic about the chemistry, so unless he has some kind of body odor problem he hasn't told me about I think we're definitely good on that one!
carvidep Posted July 19, 2010 Posted July 19, 2010 SK it's great to see that you're keeping an open mind and thinking seriously about each aspect of your LDR thus far and the first meeting. You've got a good head on your shoulders and I have a feeling that things are gonna go well for you and your SO no matter what the outcome is.
Citizen Erased Posted July 19, 2010 Posted July 19, 2010 Everyone, good luck and thanks for sharing. I feel very optimistic about the chemistry, so unless he has some kind of body odor problem he hasn't told me about I think we're definitely good on that one! I met him in March for the first time and it was so natural from the start, just as it had been the 5 months we spent online getting to know each other...beyond what we knew from the 4 years we spent on here as friends. I'd never connected with someone so easily, so freely. Our connection, our chemistry, online was amazing but in person it is literally effortless. When I saw him again a few weeks ago it was like I hadn't even left. Seeing him for the first time, both times, was worth every day spent without him and every minute spent on that damn plane. Touching him, his smell, his warmth, it's all a part of him beyond the voice I hear and the face I see that I fell in love with before we even met. One thing I wasn't prepared for was how hard it was to leave. It was like another part of me I never knew I had was taken away from me. I had focused so much more on that first meeting and the time we spent together, it was really hard. I'm not trying to be a downer, just prepare yourself. If things go well, and I mean really well, it is painful to leave that behind.
Author SassyKitten Posted July 19, 2010 Author Posted July 19, 2010 CE - That's exactly what I feel like already when we have to hang up from our Skype conversations, that is feeling like I've found that part of me and not wanting to say goodbye!! But then while I know it's worth it as this is only temporary, time goes by so slowly while you're waiting.
Steven101 Posted July 20, 2010 Posted July 20, 2010 I remember when i met my ex, I got of the train went upto her friend who is a male first gave him a hug. Saw her went upto her and kissed her on the lips, She said she was nervious and i took the nerves away.. LOL
Citizen Erased Posted July 20, 2010 Posted July 20, 2010 CE - That's exactly what I feel like already when we have to hang up from our Skype conversations, that is feeling like I've found that part of me and not wanting to say goodbye!! But then while I know it's worth it as this is only temporary, time goes by so slowly while you're waiting. Yeah I was like that too. The time goes slow but you do get there...eventually. I really hope it goes well. I know my relationship is the hardest one I've been in but it is by far the most rewarding.
Author SassyKitten Posted July 21, 2010 Author Posted July 21, 2010 I can see it turning out that way, for one I can say one thing this relationship is definitely teaching me more than any other one I've been in is patience!! I found out the hard way that one is kind of necessary when dealing with a 6 hour time zone difference.
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