Durden Posted February 7, 2004 Share Posted February 7, 2004 My girlfriend finished with me 3 weeks ago and I'm feeling really low I hadnt been paying her enough attention as I was stressed out at work, not eating properly and getting in bad moods because of it. As soon as we split, i jacked the job in and got another which isnt stressful at all. I was hoping she'd want to get back if i could show her i'd changed but she doesnt want too. I was with her for a year and a half. I havent had any contact with her for a week now. I've sent her a letter explaining why i was so off with her, but dont think she'll get it till after the wkd. I really want to speak to her, but so far I have resisted the urge to phone or text her. I dont want to phone in case she doesnt answer or is nasty to me on the phone. I dont know what to do, i miss her so much Link to post Share on other sites
xalysabethh Posted February 7, 2004 Share Posted February 7, 2004 No real advice just letting you know that i've been there and know its hard . hang in there. see what happends once she gets the letter. xalsyabeth Link to post Share on other sites
Author Durden Posted February 7, 2004 Author Share Posted February 7, 2004 I really feel like **** at the moment, im trying not to think about her but i cant help it. Somedays im ok, others im just crying. I dont even know if she cares, thats the worst thing. Link to post Share on other sites
carla Posted February 7, 2004 Share Posted February 7, 2004 Send her flowers, With a card of a picture of a dog house. She will get the flowers and the letter and then just wait from there.Play it by ear. Good Luck Link to post Share on other sites
UCFKevin Posted February 7, 2004 Share Posted February 7, 2004 Listen, man, from someone who recently went thru something like that, and from someone who occassionally feels the same way you do, don't fight the feelings. Don't try to make yourself think or feel things other than what you're thinking or feeling. That's just lying to yourself. If you want to cry, cry. If you want to think about her, think about her. I've been doing it lately and it really brings me down and gets me depressed, but eventually it passes. You just gotta look to the future. It's a pretty recent event for you, so you're going to be feeling like this for a while. Whether she cares or not is irrelevant. It's over. It doesn't matter anymore. Don't call her or contact her or anything like that. Don't be the little lost puppy. Girls HATE that sorta stuff. Just try to be strong. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Durden Posted February 7, 2004 Author Share Posted February 7, 2004 I have sent her a single red rose saying i really love her and miss her, and the letter was posted yesterday. Thanks for the replys. Just hate the feeling i have at the moment. I dont want to phone her when im in theis state anyway, i'll en up crying down the phone. Link to post Share on other sites
UCFKevin Posted February 7, 2004 Share Posted February 7, 2004 Yeah, that is one thing you DO NOT want to happen. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Durden Posted February 7, 2004 Author Share Posted February 7, 2004 Well, she got the letter today, and she text me saying she didnt know what to say. Just wanted her CD's back! So, I text her a cple of times, she text back, then i thought sod it and phoned her. She actually answered and we were talking for a while. Not about getting together or anything, just about what we have been up 2 and stuff. Then were texting eachother after for a while, then i had to go out and did the same. So, at least she is talking to me, but dunno what to do. I DIDNT cry on the phone thank god. Think i'll leave it for a cple of days see what happens. Link to post Share on other sites
UCFKevin Posted February 7, 2004 Share Posted February 7, 2004 She wants her CDs back? Ouch. Doesn't look good. Link to post Share on other sites
pinkroses Posted February 8, 2004 Share Posted February 8, 2004 I've been apart from my bf for a month now. We were talking every day for months, now suddenly no more at all. I would like to discuss things with him, but I feel that he needs to apologize to me, and approach me first. I'm hurt and angry, but I'm also missing him, and I still care. Those first few weeks are so miserable, sometimes it almost feels as if the ex has died, unless you get good closure, or you're thrilled to get away. Hopefully in time we'll both be able to have a talk with our exes and feel more free moving on. Link to post Share on other sites
UCFKevin Posted February 8, 2004 Share Posted February 8, 2004 I think that's potentially one of the most painfuls to go through, seeing and talking to someone every single day for years and having that suddenly stop. It's almost like stopping breathing. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Durden Posted February 8, 2004 Author Share Posted February 8, 2004 Well im going to leave it for a bit, u think i should send her something for valentines? And what kind of msg could i write? Link to post Share on other sites
monkey Posted February 8, 2004 Share Posted February 8, 2004 I was told there's no neutral valentines day card. I see it as no problem, just because she doesn't love you, doesn't mean you don't love her. I love my s/o, even though she lied to me. It's been 3 half months now with just mails, i feel i need to speak properly to her, but she needs space, its a nightmare. Link to post Share on other sites
Arabess Posted February 8, 2004 Share Posted February 8, 2004 I don't think there is anything harder in life than getting over someone you truly loved. Link to post Share on other sites
carla Posted February 8, 2004 Share Posted February 8, 2004 If you send her something for V day make it something small : a little heart of chocolates or a single flower. Message being simply "Thinking of You." Link to post Share on other sites
UCFKevin Posted February 8, 2004 Share Posted February 8, 2004 Arabess, I truly think losing a loved one from a breakup is more painful than losing someone from death. I mean, I'm not saying my grandmother dying wasn't devastating, hell I basically flunked out of college because of it but with that, there was nothing that could be done, there was no "what if" but with losing a SO....totally different story. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Durden Posted February 8, 2004 Author Share Posted February 8, 2004 I text her asking if she'd like to meet up 1 night next week for a drink and a chat. And she replied no thanks. That hurts, because since we split i've never had a chance to talk to her about it. Only on the phone. I guess i may as well forget it. She said she doesnt mind a text or phonecall now and again but nothing else. But thats not going to help me is it? Feels like my guts been ripped out and chewed up and spat out. Link to post Share on other sites
UCFKevin Posted February 8, 2004 Share Posted February 8, 2004 You said it yourself. Might as well forget it. Link to post Share on other sites
maxmuscle Posted February 8, 2004 Share Posted February 8, 2004 Druden, Hang in there! I know it must have been tough to hear those words "No thanks" from the person you love or who once loved you. UCKevin is right, it is extremely difficult getting over an ex love. Often times, I find myself thinking about my ex and missing her to the end of the earth. I am assuming that you are thinking of many possible ways to turn the table? You can't! I have pretty much accepted my reality of no possible reconciliation. The only can thing I can do now is to look toward the future for a brighter day.... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Durden Posted February 8, 2004 Author Share Posted February 8, 2004 thanks for all the replys its helped me alot. Guess i just got to ride it out now Link to post Share on other sites
monkey Posted February 9, 2004 Share Posted February 9, 2004 you never know the future though, just because they think it now, doesn't mean they won't in the future Link to post Share on other sites
Author Durden Posted February 9, 2004 Author Share Posted February 9, 2004 Could have been a worse break up i suppose, could have been horrible to eachother and not talking at all. Not sure whether to send a card for valentines or not though. Feel a bit better today. Really do appreciate your posts, its helping me. Link to post Share on other sites
monkey Posted February 9, 2004 Share Posted February 9, 2004 Just email her or an ecard (not a romantic one, just friendly) & say you were going to send her a vday card, but you didn't want to push her, but the feeling is there still. It's the thought that counts, as long as she knows she's in your mind! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Durden Posted February 9, 2004 Author Share Posted February 9, 2004 I dunno, maybe i should just leave her alone. Dont want to end up making her hate me by harrashing her all the time. Thats what it feels like im doing at the mo. Link to post Share on other sites
monkey Posted February 9, 2004 Share Posted February 9, 2004 What is classed as space, my s/o says 1 mail a week, some say no contact at all for months. Just short & sweet is the thing i think. I miss her like hell, last night i read her old emails & looked at photos, i felt i needed to cry it all out & there's so many more tears where that came from, but i never will give up. Link to post Share on other sites
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