Wings Of Love Posted July 15, 2010 Posted July 15, 2010 So my ex of almost 18 months is now back in touch with me. We've had NC since last August, which was my choice. A month ago his girlfriend left him (they had been together for a little over a year) and two weeks later he started seeing someone else. The new girlfriend has gone away for roughly three weeks now. The other night my ex was saying he was scared that her feelings will have changed when she comes back. He also said he was scared his own feelings might change. Not long after this he was saying that I was very beautiful, even more so than I was when we first met, and that there weren't many people in this world as amazing as me. Recently he has been talking about our relationship a lot, he has said he wishes someone loved him the way I did, that he often goes through old messages I sent him and that he still has everything I gave him, including photos, some of which he should really get rid of. And he also wants to see me, and take me clubbing, even though he knows I don't enjoy it. But he also thinks he should stop talking to me because he 'hurt me and I shouldn't care about him anymore'. Last night he was telling me that he was traveling to see her for the day today. He seemed pleased at first, but as the evening wore on he became more and more depressed. Jokingly I said I'd come and cheer him up with plenty of hugs. He merely responded "I wish. :(". He's very overprotective of me and doesn't seem to approve of any of the men I develop an interest in. Also, I'm not really sure if it means anything, but due to some unnecessary comments from two of his ex girlfriends, he is now very insecure about sex. His new girlfriend is a firm christian and does not believe in sex before marriage. That's fair enough, but my ex is in no way religious. He told me he was glad she was so against it because he doesn't have to be so worried anymore, and that this reason was one of the main ones he was with her. He does, however, joke about having sex with me a lot. He does know I still have feelings for him, we discussed this recently, and he was quite honest in saying that he had moved on and that our time together is over. I would like to say I've accepted that, but his behavior since then seems to say otherwise. I mean maybe I'm wrong, but he seems to be acting a little TOO friendly. Help?
Maverick1983 Posted July 15, 2010 Posted July 15, 2010 I think he might realise that the grass is not in fact greener on the other side and has maybe tried to reconnect with you upon discovering this.It's completely you're decision on how you read into it but if you have doubts about his intentions leave him wait and if he waits their good and if he runs he's not serious about it.
Author Wings Of Love Posted July 16, 2010 Author Posted July 16, 2010 Well...I suppose it is possible that he is trying to reconnect. But it seems as though he's simply trying to keep me sweet so he won't be alone if his relationship breaks down. I mean we have no contact for almost a year, his girlfriend finds someone else, so he turns to me. Why? He said there was no reason, but I wonder if it's because he knew I still loved him and wanted someone to boost his bruised ego. Now that we're talking again, if I act indifferent, he's very affectionate and asks all these questions, generally acting as though he really cares and is really interested. But if I'm affectionate with him (which is very much in my nature) he doesn't respond much and he's quite distant with me. Any thoughts?
LoveTruthChaos Posted July 17, 2010 Posted July 17, 2010 I gave you my thoughts. Your world is going to go topsy turvy if you don't run now. Why open up old wounds? If you were really indifferent, you wouldn't care about what he's doing now, nor would you get involved.
Author Wings Of Love Posted July 17, 2010 Author Posted July 17, 2010 I didn't say I was indifferent, I said I acted indifferent sometimes. I'm not trying to open old wounds, because wounds that have never healed over don't need reopening. I don't expect people to understand, I'm just desperately trying to make sense of something. But perhaps you're right and it is time to run away from my problems. Though from my experience, that does nothing.
LoveTruthChaos Posted July 17, 2010 Posted July 17, 2010 If the problem has a name and it's your ex's name....then run. Are you doing this because you want another chance with him? I know it's not what you want to hear, but he doesn't want one with you. He's USING you as a shoulder to cry on, just as he's used you before. What part of that do you want to continue dragging yourself through? You're worth more than that. Spare yourself your dignity.
Author Wings Of Love Posted July 17, 2010 Author Posted July 17, 2010 Yeah, you're right. I am worth more than this. Of course I want another chance with him, but I suppose I know deep inside that he really doesn't feel the same, and I'm just trying to fool myself. It's time to remove him from my life again, because he's already trying his best to get his hooks in as deep as possible. After such a long time apart you'd think I'd know better.
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