rawr Posted July 14, 2010 Posted July 14, 2010 Crap. I'm being SO OCD. Need to rant. I've been dating this guy for about 4 months. Both of us dating other people. Three weeks ago we took the plunge and made a commitment. I desperately needed to move and he found a great opp for me...close to him. I grabbed it. Mind you it's only 15 miles from where I was but still...different town. I've been here for two weeks. Everything was going well... One thing about him that drives me nuts. He doesn't man up. We were both dating around 3 weeks ago...I cut off the 2 others interested in me by maturely telling them the truth. My bf? He plays the "ignore them and they'll disappear" game. Over the course of the last 3 weeks the other 2 ladies he was "dating" on occasion have emailed and called. He deletes the emails and ignores the calls...Why do I hate this? Because of days like today. Every morning since I moved my bf has called me to say good morning. He works...a lot...just like me...but manages to call me to say hello, good morning and texts me a couple of times throughout the day. Today...nothing. I called him. He didn't answer. Ok, so maybe he's working. He said he had a lot to do today...Obviously I am very insecure in this whole thing. I don't like where it's going. If my world would be turned upside down by the lack of one phone call, it's not a comforting or healthy relationship... I can just hear him telling someone "I'm just not going to answer...and she will eventually disappear." Anybody got a beer? Or six?
skydiveaddict Posted July 14, 2010 Posted July 14, 2010 Take it easy. He probably just had a real busy day, just like you said.
TouchedByViolet Posted July 14, 2010 Posted July 14, 2010 Sigh... why are you doing this to yourself?
alphamale Posted July 14, 2010 Posted July 14, 2010 you've been committed for 3 weeks only. i think you're being hyper-sensitive here
dressing up Posted July 14, 2010 Posted July 14, 2010 I know where you're coming from. His behavior toward others makes you wonder if he would do that to you too. He might be busy. He might be not. Who knows? Do you think you might have insecurity issues yourself? Just saying.
Author rawr Posted July 14, 2010 Author Posted July 14, 2010 Thanks, guys. Don't know why I'm doing this to myself...Had to stop and ask myself that actually. Me...the insanely independent, wise, headstrong gal of my group. I'm like a messy bowl of half chilled jello. Worst case scenerio is still not the end of the world. I'm going to go with "busy day" for now.
alphamale Posted July 14, 2010 Posted July 14, 2010 Thanks, guys. Don't know why I'm doing this to myself...Had to stop and ask myself that actually. Me...the insanely independent, wise, headstrong gal of my group. I'm like a messy bowl of half chilled jello. Worst case scenerio is still not the end of the world. I'm going to go with "busy day" for now. why don't you txt message him to come over for sex tonite? that should get a reply
Author rawr Posted July 14, 2010 Author Posted July 14, 2010 I know where you're coming from. His behavior toward others makes you wonder if he would do that to you too. He might be busy. He might be not. Who knows? Do you think you might have insecurity issues yourself? Just saying. Certainly do. Yes, that's my entire point...He could and would do the same to me. I'd just rather hear it. It is unusual though to not hear from him. I worked 11 hours yesterday and couldn't see him for the first full day since the move and here I am. He wasn't happy about it...but love doesn't pay the bills. If in fact he IS "disappearing" it may be for the best...but not for a few days anyway.
Author rawr Posted July 14, 2010 Author Posted July 14, 2010 why don't you txt message him to come over for sex tonite? that should get a reply Ha! Four months and I still haven't slept with him. Go me. Hey, maybe that's why he isn't calling. You think?
Serenitynow Posted July 14, 2010 Posted July 14, 2010 You are definitely freaking out for no reason. One day isnt going to kill you. But I do agree with you on how he is handling the other women. It would make me suspicious.
alphamale Posted July 14, 2010 Posted July 14, 2010 Ha! Four months and I still haven't slept with him. Go me. WTF four months? i would never date a chick for that long without sex.
Author rawr Posted July 14, 2010 Author Posted July 14, 2010 You are definitely freaking out for no reason. One day isnt going to kill you. But I do agree with you on how he is handling the other women. It would make me suspicious. I agree. It makes me suspicious on one hand...I mean, is he just trying to keep them stringing along? But on the other hand it's just a crappy thing to do to a person who cares for you. Man up. Be honest. Say "I'm seeing someone else..." It's the right thing to do...and of course, it leaves me wondering if I will be the next, at any given moment, who is in need of "getting the hint." It sucks.
Author rawr Posted July 14, 2010 Author Posted July 14, 2010 WTF four months? i would never date a chick for that long without sex. Alpha...there are other things a couple can do, you know? And it was a mutual decision...we both came to this decision months ago.
alphamale Posted July 15, 2010 Posted July 15, 2010 Alpha...there are other things a couple can do, you know? yea but those are boring....you better give this chap some action pretty quick or he'll slip thru your fingers, trust me
Author rawr Posted July 15, 2010 Author Posted July 15, 2010 yea but those are boring....you better give this chap some action pretty quick or he'll slip thru your fingers, trust me I know you are right...trust me. I'm a bit tired of waiting myself.
alphamale Posted July 15, 2010 Posted July 15, 2010 He doesn't man up. your making him wait 4+ months for sex doesn't help him "man up"
Author rawr Posted July 15, 2010 Author Posted July 15, 2010 I was freaking for no stupid reason. He was working in an area with no service. OCD, FTW!! Probably some hormonal female thing. Sometimes I wish I were a dude. Still thinking...I may ask that he do the right thing and tell these chics the truth...cut them off. No hanging strings should remain. And promise me if he changes his mind about me he'll just come out and say so...Do I see him doing it? Not too sure.
Author rawr Posted July 15, 2010 Author Posted July 15, 2010 your making him wait 4+ months for sex doesn't help him "man up" I didn't make him wait. Didn't want to sound like a ho...but I'm the one having to wait. He wanted it to be special...doesn't want to sleep around. Etc etc. Blah Blah blah. It was cute 3 months ago. LOL!
sugarmomma Posted July 15, 2010 Posted July 15, 2010 Relax. He will call. Sometimes men don't call just to get us all worked up. Don't bite the bait.
CLC2008 Posted July 15, 2010 Posted July 15, 2010 I've been dating this guy for about 4 months. Both of us dating other people. Three weeks ago we took the plunge and made a commitment. One day no call thing is no biggie, but what you've described above, that's not a commitment.
dressing up Posted July 15, 2010 Posted July 15, 2010 Another reason you're freaking out is probably because it's the first time he's done this, at least to you. As it happens more, which is only natural, you'll get used to it.
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