Mixed Signals

[alteregos]

My ex and I broke up about a month ago and it may sound weird but it was a good break up. We agreed on it and said we'd remain good friends and we are still very close.

Honestly, I didn't want it to end yet cause what we had was pretty good, but there were reasons to why it was needed for us to stay separated. It was the best decision for the both of us, being where we are in our lives.

This break up didn't officially END us either though, there's still a chance that we will get back together in the future. (Like 3 yrs from now, if we're both single and still interested in one another).

 

I thought we both were gonna finally move on, but it seems like he's giving me mixed signals. I need INSIGHT on what all his actions mean?

 

He was my first boyfriend and our relationship lasted about 4 months and we saw each other at least once a month (it was a long distance relationship).

Since I lack experience, when we broke up I didn't know whether or not to keep in contact with him or not, but I did the two following days after we broke up (on the second day I told myself that I was over him). Then the next day when I didn't contact him at all he texted me before going to sleep and we exchanged a few text messages and said goodnight.

 

The next day I didn't contact him again and that night, right when I got in bed I received a text message from him asking why I didn't talk to him as much anymore and he felt like I was trying to ignore him. I told him I didn't think I needed to do all the work of contacting him and I still wanted to keep in contact and that I would have been devastated it if we lost our friendship. Then he tells me that he waits for me to text him and that every time he receives a text message he's hoping it's me. I felt the same way, but I didn't tell him. I just told him that I would text him more and he said he'd do the same.

 

There was a point where in a text message he asked me what I was doing and I told him I was thinking about something and reading stuff. He then proceeded to ask what I was thinking and I didn't tell him because I told him it was unnecessary to speak about it NOW, cause it was a question I had about us. I told him, maybe in the future. He said OK, but a few days later he brought it back up and said that he felt as if I didn't trust him anymore and etc. But I had to explain myself and we got everything cleared up, had our closure (i think =O), encouraged one another to meet new people, for me not to wait on him, and to not be afraid to go on casual dates.

 

His cellphone was then disconnected (it was something that his parents planned on, so it wasn't out of the blue) so we started IMing each other and webcamming each other, almost everyday. We'd bring up the past a moderate amount and ask each other a lot of question about our relationship.

 

Then recently we saw each other again at a dance. We knew we both were attending and did plan to hang out and we did hang out, A LOT (ohh we have a lot of chemistry too, i think some people thought we were on the verge of dating >.<). We danced with the same group, he asked me to slow dance with him (I was the only girl he danced with, besides my friend who asked him to dance). There was drawing for King and Queen and he won King. I congratulated him after the King and Queen dance, that's when he put his crown on my head for a good 30 secs before I gave it back to him.

 

What's got me thinking the most is when I had to leave and I was going to say bye to him. I was walking up to him to hug him and he was moving back with his arms out, I turned away and started walking away. I turned to look back and he was walking towards me and I start walking to him too, we hugged. We released the hug, I turned and he grabbed my hand and pulled me in for a second hug and held me tight and said, "you know you want to hug me again." I was like "yeah right haha." I hugged him tight too and we told each other to have fun.

 

Later on that night, he asked me to call him on the house phone and we talked about the dance and other random things.

With all this, I don't know what to think. For me, it says, 'I still want you.'

Let's say I still want him, but I'm not gonna hold him back from what he needs to do and I'm open to meeting new people.

So I feel like we still care and love each other a lot, but it's like taboo for us to talk about 'US' because we don't want to push our feelings further than just friends.

I hope this makes sense? I'd just like insight and probably advice thanks =D

Edited July 14, 2010 by alteregos