Red flags you pick up on in the opposite sex

[Woggle]

I come from a dysfunctional family and that is putting it lightly. I know I am messed up and I used to be one of those people who were proud of it and said that it made me who I am but the more I look at it the more I realize how badly it warped me.

[Engadget]

I've noticed the unbalanced women will lay their baggage out right away when you meet them. One girl told me she had an abortion 30 minutes into our date, how do you respond to that?

 

That's the biggest red flag, those ones always turn out bonkers.

[alphamale]

One girl told me she had an abortion 30 minutes into our date, how do you respond to that?

you say "oh, thats a shame"

[Engadget]

you say "oh, thats a shame"

 

:laugh:I probably should have.

 

It's like...are you trying to scare people away?

[zengirl]

I'm (obviously) a girl.

 

I basically use my gut. Red flags to me are: lying, persistent negativity, and disrespecting other people. The last one is a big one. Guys with a lack of compassion really turn me off -- even small things, like dropping something on the floor at a theatre and not picking it up (Someone has to clean that!), getting angry with someone for cutting them off in traffic, or making a disparaging remark about a stranger can add up. We all have bad days, but these are some warning signs I remember seeing.

 

@OP:

 

1. Depends on what you mean by this. In general, I think people who cannot make friends to the point where they don't seem to like/get along with people are a red flag, yes, but whether or not they have folks they're close with at the moment can be a 'Place in Life' thing. I tend to move around a lot, so I have to make new friends sometimes. My close friends don't live near me anymore. (This would probably be one of the Red Flags I'd look for with men, too.)

 

2. If this was in the past, I would accept it as in the past. I don't care so much how someone felt about themselves in the past. . . we all are here to learn and grow, and we all have lessons. Maybe those girls learned from those unhealthy relationships. If they didn't, that makes sense as aRed Flag. If they want drama, that's a red flag.

 

3. How do you classify someone as "Seeking Male Attention" all the time?

 

4. Okay, first of all: All people are a little looney sometimes. Not just women. From my read of you, I find it very possible the woman was having a bad day/stressing, and you actually CREATED the dramatic situation that occured there by trying to take charge. Maybe you didn't; I wasn't there, so I don't know. Everyone gets stressed. It doesn't help to have someone try to 'control' you (your words) when you're stressed.

 

5. I wasn't aware there were lists of Known Skanks available.

@brainygirl - I'm curious what you consider a broken family. It's an interesting prejudice (and, really, that's what it is -- since it's beyond the person's control), though entirely your preference. I think you may be projecting.

 

I'm from a [insert gasp here] "broken family," meaning my parents are divorced and their marriage was crap, and I'm not damaged by it. Unless you think this only happens to men. All the experiences contribute to who I am -- and I have 4 awesome people in my life. I don't think of my bio-Dad or Stepmom as parents (I lived with my Mom and Stepdad, and he's more like my Dad), but they were awesome adults who were always in my life, supportive, and kind of like the fun Aunt and Uncle you might visit from time to time. There are all sorts of happy homes and all sorts of unhappy ones. That said, I know some healthy people from unhappy homes, too (broken and still together).

[New_Life08]

1. Dishonesty

 

2. Talks about exes continuously

 

3. stares at other women and touches his crotch at the same time. Sexually inappropriate with other women/preoccupation with porn.

 

4. Emotional affairs - cannot cut the baggage from past dysfunctional relationships - i.e. exes he would still consider dating are still programmed in his phone and calling him.

 

5. Is standoffish to you when other female friends are around.

[New_Life08]

I'm curious to know why. I come from a broken family, which is not my fault in any way, shape or form, yet I'm already shot down simply because of this.

 

Yeah, I agree. I do not think a broken home is reason to wave a red flag. There are many broken homes for good reason and in fact a home can be more broken when it was together than it is apart.

[New_Life08]

a chick that can't cook is a big red flag

 

Hey,this is a good one. I feel that no matter how independent a woman is or how in touch with his feminine side a man is - they should have at least one talent (besides sex) that confirms what gender they are.