suzie sweet Posted July 13, 2010 Posted July 13, 2010 broke up with my fiance last night, we were getting married july next year, but i found in his hotmail private messages that he had sent to 2 women, the 1st one he explained she a good friend, fair enough but if she a good friend why didnt he tell her about me, the 2nd woman he asked hello stranger long time no speak hope to catch up soon, But the thing is wen i asked him who she is he keeps saying he dosnt know, and that maybe he did know her but she has changed her pics so maybe he didnt recognise her, even so her full name was there so surely that wud remind him. Something didnt feel right here felt he was lying cos he was getting very angry, and yesterday morning in the history files there is a load of gay porn, so what am i suppose to do, he now blaming me saying its all in my head but i saw the emails so no its not. He packed his stuff and left last night saying he had enough cos i didnt believe him. wots your oppinions on this everyone xxx
YellowShark Posted July 13, 2010 Posted July 13, 2010 but i found in his hotmail private messages that he had sent to 2 women, the 1st one he explained she a good friend, Ahhhhh the old "good friend" routine. Since you two were to get married has he ever mentioned this alleged "good friend" to you before? the 2nd woman he asked hello stranger long time no speak hope to catch up soon, But the thing is wen i asked him who she is he keeps saying he dosnt know, and that maybe he did know her but she has changed her pics so maybe he didnt recognise her, So he want to "catch up soon" with someone he claims "he doesn't know." Wow. That's interesting. ...and yesterday morning in the history files there is a load of gay porn, so what am i suppose to do, Gay porn now too huh? DOUBLE WOW. DUMP HIM FAST! he now blaming me saying its all in my head but i saw the emails so no its not. He packed his stuff and left last night saying he had enough cos i didnt believe him. wots your oppinions on this everyone.. IMHO you are free from a cheating, lying, gay man who would've broken your heart and betrayed you. You did the right thing and should be happy as hell you didn't waste the time and money on a wedding. You totally dodged a bullet!
Feelin Frisky Posted July 13, 2010 Posted July 13, 2010 Techno spies just keep seeming to discover what was not meant for them. Wish I had a buck for every thread about what some dame got off her SO's techno gizmo to make her miserable.
whatarmy Posted July 14, 2010 Posted July 14, 2010 I have to agree with both the above posts. The big alarm bell of course is the gay porn, who cares about the other women? The real issue is if he's into guys and living a total lie, in which case breaking it off for good will do you both a huge favour. On a serious note, I don't agree with disrespecting someones privacy, no matter how much ammunition it gave you. In a court of law it would be dismissed because you did not have a subpoena - and I'm not saying this is the same, but I'm sure you wouldn't like to be in a relationship where your boyfriend checks your emails, phone or internet history all the time. You can say that you would have nothing to hide, but thats my point, in his eyes you would need to be monitored because you can't be trusted. Wouldn't that make you feel like you were living with your dad rather than future husband? Anyway, although its good to see it from his perspective, the gay porn and denial of knowing who he sent an email to is obviously alarming so I think you did the right thing by breaking up with him.
stillafool Posted July 14, 2010 Posted July 14, 2010 Yeah, I'm thinking it was probably a guy or transvesite he was talking to in the email. Good you dropped him so you won't have to be his "beard".
Author suzie sweet Posted July 14, 2010 Author Posted July 14, 2010 I wasnt invading his privacy, it was my lap top i found it on, he told me it could ov been a virus, i even rang the pc shop and asked hows it got there, the man told me to delete history and see if comes back and so far it hasnt so he must have viewd those sites, but nothing about him has ever made me feel he into men, hes been married before, lived with someone and had 2 children with her...he spoke to my son last night and said its all just a big mess that has got out of hand and he can understand my point of view regarding he dosnt know the girl he sent the email too so of course im frustrated how can you not know who your emailing? He even said she could of changed her pic and looked diffrent but again why still mail her, ive deleted all his numbers so this time i have no contact at all, and im hoping if he is innocent he will get in touch and fight for me cos i love him deeply
Author suzie sweet Posted July 14, 2010 Author Posted July 14, 2010 he was sexualy abused as a child by his dad, so hes always told me regarding the sex department ill never go near his backside, and hes never with me well twice sorry i know this isnt a nice subject, so if he was gay wouldnt he want to be doing it from behind with me often so he cud fantasise he was sexing a man ???
Ilovecake Posted July 14, 2010 Posted July 14, 2010 broke up with my fiance last night, we were getting married july next year, but i found in his hotmail private messages that he had sent to 2 women, the 1st one he explained she a good friend, fair enough but if she a good friend why didnt he tell her about me, the 2nd woman he asked hello stranger long time no speak hope to catch up soon, But the thing is wen i asked him who she is he keeps saying he dosnt know, and that maybe he did know her but she has changed her pics so maybe he didnt recognise her, even so her full name was there so surely that wud remind him. Something didnt feel right here felt he was lying cos he was getting very angry, and yesterday morning in the history files there is a load of gay porn, so what am i suppose to do, he now blaming me saying its all in my head but i saw the emails so no its not. He packed his stuff and left last night saying he had enough cos i didnt believe him. wots your oppinions on this everyone xxx I think you just broke up with my ex boyfriend.
Ilovecake Posted July 14, 2010 Posted July 14, 2010 Yeah, I'm thinking it was probably a guy or transvesite he was talking to in the email. Good you dropped him so you won't have to be his "beard". That's just ignorant. Things aren't that black and white. You can be curious but not be gay. Just because he's looking at other men does not mean he's not interested in women.
Ilovecake Posted July 14, 2010 Posted July 14, 2010 I wasnt invading his privacy, it was my lap top i found it on, he told me it could ov been a virus, i even rang the pc shop and asked hows it got there, the man told me to delete history and see if comes back and so far it hasnt so he must have viewd those sites, but nothing about him has ever made me feel he into men, hes been married before, lived with someone and had 2 children with her...he spoke to my son last night and said its all just a big mess that has got out of hand and he can understand my point of view regarding he dosnt know the girl he sent the email too so of course im frustrated how can you not know who your emailing? He even said she could of changed her pic and looked diffrent but again why still mail her, ive deleted all his numbers so this time i have no contact at all, and im hoping if he is innocent he will get in touch and fight for me cos i love him deeply You don't own these people an explanation. He had things to hide and was hiding them. He has no right to get mad at you for looking at that stuff. If you have a feeling that you’re being lied to and you confront them and they're obviously covering something up what are you supposed to do? Of course you’re going to look for answers. This is your life and thankfully you found this stuff out before getting married. Trust is not prearranged, it’s earned and obviously he didn’t earn it.
stillafool Posted July 14, 2010 Posted July 14, 2010 That's just ignorant. Things aren't that black and white. You can be curious but not be gay. Just because he's looking at other men does not mean he's not interested in women. No it's not! It's ignorant to not think this is a clue that this man may be bisexual! Tell this to the thousands of women who have contracted diseases from "down low" men.
Ilovecake Posted July 14, 2010 Posted July 14, 2010 No it's not! It's ignorant to not think this is a clue that this man may be bisexual! Tell this to the thousands of women who have contracted diseases from "down low" men. Wow even more ignorance. Talk to a million people who have contracted diseases from people who were sleeping with the opposite sex. What does your sexual preference have to do with diseases? Again just because he’s looking at pictures doesn’t mean anything. I’ve looked at pictures of other women and I’m still only attracted to men. My sister is gay but still enjoys the male body. Your unsubstantiated line of thinking is dangerous because it created fear and fear creates hate. Anyway this is not al all what you said in your first post.
Author suzie sweet Posted July 15, 2010 Author Posted July 15, 2010 It all dosnt matter now, cos found so much info from his x partner,last night.. He has been constantly lying to me about everything, the stuff she told me was unbelievable, i really cant get my head round this at all, its killing me how i was sucked into a world of true love and happiness that ive never had before from any man, my mr right, my everything but he was another person behind that gorgeous face of his. Hes skint me, hes betryaed me everything, how the hell can i get over this, I got a bit nasty with my txts to him last night and he had the cheek to ask me why was i been like this, i havent told him i know about the lies i want him to suffer wondering like ive had to all week, oh yes regarding that email he sent it was to his x fiance, twice hes been engaged in the past couple of years and he didnt even tell me that, He even cancelled a weddding 3 wks before the date to his other 4th fiance
stillafool Posted July 15, 2010 Posted July 15, 2010 Wow even more ignorance. Talk to a million people who have contracted diseases from people who were sleeping with the opposite sex. What does your sexual preference have to do with diseases? Again just because he’s looking at pictures doesn’t mean anything. I’ve looked at pictures of other women and I’m still only attracted to men. My sister is gay but still enjoys the male body. Your unsubstantiated line of thinking is dangerous because it created fear and fear creates hate. Anyway this is not al all what you said in your first post. I have several gay relatives, men and women (as if that has anything to do with it) and even my gay cousin tells me about all the "down low" men he sleeps around with. Our 19 year old cousin contracted aids from her first boyfriend who later admitted to being bisexual. I am not against gay people but when you are bisexual it puts lives at risk. If you are bisexual you should let people know this before you engage in sexual actiivity. Women typically are more truthful about their bisexuallity than men. Yes you can get diseases from any type of sex but if a woman thinks a man may be having sex with another man and then her; she would be a fool not to think about her health. Looking at pictures of the opposite sex is one thing but to troll websites of naked women would raise an eyebrow. I am not creating hate and you don't know enough about me to make that remark!
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