thatguy100 Posted July 12, 2010 Posted July 12, 2010 Sorry this is kinda long and well ... I tired to give as much detail as possible. My ex and I dated for about 18 months, of those 18 months 14.5 of those were the best months in our lives. The last 3.5 months were just a mess due to stress, miss understandings and depression. It has been 5 months since our break up. At first I didn't put up any fight or anything I just accepted it for what her decision was(she was very happy that I seemed to understand and was saying 'thank you so much for understanding'), since she was acting distant and didn't seem interested anymore. I couldn't be myself and felt really judged by her (She pointed out a major flaw in me(or in her eye's) that being that I don't really put her in her place when she acts out of line, also near the end she pointed out my body flaws and also seeming like I was obsessed with her). She did the traditional break up lines, with "your such a great guy, your mr.perfect and everything", but the one thing I didn't expect was "You are the type of guy I can see myself marrying, but I don't want to get your hopes up that we will get back together in the near future, you are very loyal and I know you would wait for me". So shortly after we broke up she began dating another guy(about a week after we broke up) and started having sex with this guy right away. I didn't find this out till about a month and a half of these two dating when one of our mutual friends said "I am curious has your ex told you about her new boy friend". I was flabbergasted. So me and her talked and she said "We both need time to adjust to what has happened between us and for both of us to remain friends for a long period of time, I don't want to lose our friendship, I do care for you I hope you know I still do really care for you, I want us to remain friends for the next few years and hopefully even further into the future, don't block me from your email please!". So another few months pass, we chat every now and again updating each other about our lives and meet up for coffee every 2 weeks or so just to keep in touch. We did talk about our relationship every now and again, but shortly after we do she brings up her boy friend. Then recently she has been talking to a few of my mutual friends and found out that I had done some stuff with them and she just mentioned it nothing more or less I didn't react to it. Then while outside with her in her back yard we were just sitting around near the pool and she wanted to tan so she takes her clothes off (bathing suit underneath) she says "Don't worry, I am not taking my clothes off for you, and sorry I know I should do this inside and I don't want to give you any ideas". So again I just didn't say anything again, and continued to talk to her about what I had been up to. This is all while she is currently dating another guy. Now I think I maybe over reacting and that there is nothing there, that she is just goofing around. But I do some what still kinda like her a bit, not enough to do anything about it (since she has a boy friend). What do you think?
bayouboi Posted July 12, 2010 Posted July 12, 2010 I'm not saying this to attack you but rather as a form of a wake-up call, but you are acting like a pathetic wuss from what you've described above. Dude, move on and cut off ALL contact with this b8tch. You deserve better than a game-playing ho that wants you to stay on the backburner for her while she has lots of sex with other guys. Wake up man.
Taramere Posted July 12, 2010 Posted July 12, 2010 What do you think? I think she will carry on saying and doing whatever is in her interests rather than yours. She's evidently smart and confident enough to pre-empt any suspicions you might have that she's playing with you here. The "I'm not doing this for your benefit" comment when she undressed in front of you is a classic example. A good answer, in response to that, would have been to laugh, say "yeah you are" and then ignore her. An even better response would be to avoid getting into more of those situations by steering well clear of her. She sounds like particularly bad news, because from what you're saying she knows exactly how much pain this is causing you - and she's carefully evading responsibility (ie by talking about not wanting to get your hopes up) while equally carefully doing what needs to be done in order to keep you hanging on in her life.
Shakz Posted July 12, 2010 Posted July 12, 2010 You're the fish she keeps on a string in the water until she catches a bigger fish. Do you honestly believe she wasn't already sleeping with the new boyfriend when she was with you? One week? She criticizes you down to the last detail and then tells you how perfect you are. Marriage material? She strips for you and then tells you don't get your hopes up? Dude, you're a fish.
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