kiki30 Posted July 11, 2010 Posted July 11, 2010 Okay here's the deets...a friend of mine let his friend know that I was "really interested in his photography and had met him once before". He was receptive and said I should contact him. Trouble is that I have never done this before, and after the end of a 7 year relationship a year and a half ago this is a huge step. I know I shouldn't be so nervous, but I'm not sure what I should do next, I don't have facebook and sending him an email seems kind of impersonal. Yet calling him up, seems a little too much. I just wanna go for a coffee or something, chatting on the phone might be too hard since we have never really spoke before. Any ideas? Thanks in advance
counterman Posted July 11, 2010 Posted July 11, 2010 Did he give your friend receive any contact details from his friend in which you could use to contact him by? Like a phone number? I think you should call him. It won't be too much if you keep it short and just ask if you could meet up. "Hi, this is <your name>, <your friend's name>'s friend,......." talk a bit about what you're interested in and then ask him if he wants to meet up to talk more about this because you're really interested in his photography
yume Posted July 11, 2010 Posted July 11, 2010 Figure out some way to bump into him...tell your mutual friend to plan an party or something. Personally, I would do this over calling him, but maybe it's just me since I hate talking on the phone to semi-strangers...they always seem to be severely awkward conversations
Feelin Frisky Posted July 11, 2010 Posted July 11, 2010 Don't cop out an do anything by FB, e-mail or text. That's chicken-shi+ nonsense. He said it was OK to contact him, so call him up, re-introduce yourself and ask if he is free to speak at the moment--don't assume. If he says he's free to talk and perhaps is delighted you called I suggest aksing to meet for something less than a date--not coffee or a drink which are as cliche as hell but something where you can find out if there's any hope or chemistry without the "cornering" of a dinner. I personally think a breakfast or brunch at a diner on a Sunday late morning is a way to find out a lot and provides a way to part with much of the day still ahead as if neither is desperate or has an agenda. There's enough time to see if he migh want to see you which will take the presure off of you and if it doesn't happen that way you can ask him if (if the vibe feels right and you've learned he's free) if he'd like see a movie or something like that. Easy does it. It's mature and confident and gives yourself an out if things turn out uncomfortably.
Gold Pile Posted July 11, 2010 Posted July 11, 2010 Perhaps call him and just talk about something, see if he asks you out. I sometimes will forward the rare GOOD email joke to a target. My contact info (beyond email addy) is always in it. Not specifically TO them, but there for them to see. It doesn't have to be joke email, it could be other interesting topics. I don't think email or texting is a cop out, I've been very lucky this way. Its a good and easy icebreaker.
Serenitynow Posted July 11, 2010 Posted July 11, 2010 Welcome to the world of male dating. This is exactly what us guys have to go through everyday. And this is exactly why females like you wont do it. Grow a pair and call him. The world is not going to end.(not yet at least) I don't think email or texting is a cop out, I've been very lucky this way. Its a good and easy icebreaker. Yes it is a cop out. Its a way of hiding in your shell and not putting yourself out there. Its for people that arent secure enough with themselves to just come out and say what they want.
Gold Pile Posted July 12, 2010 Posted July 12, 2010 I have texted and emailed many women and scored. That is the bottom line. I do plenty of asking in person too. One method leaves you less exposed but you shouldn't rule it out, it can work. Some women respond in kind to a flirt text when they wouldn't do so in person. Asking a lady out in front of other people leads her to consider what those people will think of her accepting your invite. Calling her aside by text can work wonders. In person, by text, by email, or call.... each method works, just pick whats best for a given situation. Mr.Serenity, come join us in the modern age.
carhill Posted July 12, 2010 Posted July 12, 2010 Any ideas? For me it's easy..... 'Hey, there's a cruise-in this weekend at xxx. I hear you have a cool pony car. Wanna go?' Saddle up! Adapt as appropriate to 'photography'. Enjoy
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