Men Adopting Female Behaviours

[Gero]

Well if you take a look at the list again and think of opposite behaviors, that should give you a good idea.

 

And while were on the mini subject of past generations, keep in mind that guys are not the same as they were in the 30s and 40s, or even the 50s. A lot of it has to do with the relationship between father and son, which has made a drastic change in more recent generations.

 

Which could be related to people having sex before marriage and having kids when they are not ready to have kids. Then these kids grow up with a dead beat dad or no male role model in their lives at all.

 

Then these men grow up and get treated like crap like it's their fault that they aren't the perfect embodiment of what a man should be in a woman's eyes.

[Crusoe]

A lot of it has to do with the relationship between father and son, which has made a drastic change in more recent generations.

 

And here we are getting to the biggest cause of feminine men, too much Mum not enough Dad.

[threebyfate]

And here we are getting to the biggest cause of feminine men, too much Mum not enough Dad.

So, where's Dad?

[Gero]

So, where's Dad?

 

Out running around because Mom had unprotected sex with someone that was a dead beat.

 

There is a solution to this problem and it's simple. People need to think before having sex and having kids at such a young age.

 

As much as women think they can do the whole single parent thing, it's obviously not working. Boys need male role models growing up.

 

Men also need to be responsible and be there for their kids instead of flaking out.

[Crusoe]

So, where's Dad?

 

Looking for an easy life.

[Woggle]

Can we also say that women who adopt male behaviors are a turn-off? If woman want men to be men again why can't they start being women? You can't ask men to be alpha again while at the sane time calling us sexist when we don't want some ballbusting feminist.

[TheLoneSock]

And here we are getting to the biggest cause of feminine men, too much Mum not enough Dad.

 

Basically, but I think more so not enough of the right kind of Dad.

 

So, where's Dad?

 

Working too long of hours, or on the couch watching tv, or in prison, or simply taking on a passive parenting role; or one of many other things that distract him or pronounce him absent of his role of fatherhood.

[Gero]

Can we also say that women who adopt male behaviors are a turn-off? If woman want men to be men again why can't they start being women? You can't ask men to be alpha again while at the sane time calling us sexist when we don't want some ballbusting feminist.

 

True. True.

[Crusoe]

Boys need male role models growing up.

 

Men also need to be responsible and be there for their kids instead of flaking out.

 

Absolutely.

[threebyfate]

In all this parental blaming, can an adult male not change themselves if they're so unhappy with their foundational years? Is being a victim for life, something that people should aspire to?

[Gero]

In all this parental blaming, can an adult male not change themselves if they're so unhappy with their foundational years? Is being a victim for life, something that people should aspire to?

 

Being a man is something you have to learn. You can't just wake up as an adult and somehow change everything you were brought up with. Since women avoid guys who aren't completely perfect in their eyes in terms of what their role should be as a man these men have no idea how to change their behavior or even know that they are doing something wrong.

 

If you go through life being rejected and people tell you nothing is wrong with you and don't change then of course you are going to take the role of a victim.

 

Stop telling guys they are nice and not to change but you don't want them and instead tell them what's wrong with them. That's what women need to do.

[threebyfate]

Being a man is something you have to learn. You can't just wake up as an adult and somehow change everything you were brought up with. Since women avoid guys who aren't completely perfect in their eyes in terms of what their role should be as a man these men have no idea how to change their behavior or even know that they are doing something wrong.

 

Stop telling guys they are nice and not to change but you don't want them and instead tell them what's wrong with them. That's what women need to do.

What do you suppose this thread is for? But you have difficulty with this thread and feel I should point out the positives, right?

[TheLoneSock]

In all this parental blaming, can an adult male not change themselves if they're so unhappy with their foundational years? Is being a victim for life, something that people should aspire to?

 

I'd say parenting is only part of the problem. The current society not only enables, but encourages self defeat and being a career victim. However, society is also only part of the problem as well. The main problem still lies within.

 

Boys will be boys... and will continue to be boys unless taught otherwise.

 

Sometimes that teacher has to be themselves, or even other men.

[Gero]

What do you suppose this thread is for? But you have difficulty with this thread and feel I should point out the positives, right?

 

I was speaking of women in general. They need to be more honest and stop playing games with the so called "nice guys". I still stand by what I said and I believe that you are being too harsh on these guys. It's not completely their fault that a lot of them were never taught how they are supposed to act in terms of gender roles. I think a lot of women are too demanding in this respect and don't give these guys a chance.

 

There's too much hate out there. I don't get it.

[Woggle]

In all this parental blaming, can an adult male not change themselves if they're so unhappy with their foundational years? Is being a victim for life, something that people should aspire to?

 

It is not about aspiring to be a victim for life but ingeneral there is nobody to teach a boy how to be a man plus the constant messages that men are useless and disposable and you have what you have today. Even men with something to offer choose to avoid it because they know what is eventually waiting for them.

[Disillusioned]

It suddenly occurred to me why proverbial "nice guys" and PUAs are such a turn-off. They've adopted female behaviours.

 

Agree or disagree?

 

I disagree. Realmen are just about as bad as women who are man-hating viragos.

[threebyfate]

I'd say parenting is only part of the problem. The current society not only enables, but encourages self defeat and being a career victim. However, society is also only part of the problem as well. The main problem still lies within.

 

Boys will be boys... and will continue to be boys unless taught otherwise.

 

Sometimes that teacher has to be themselves, or even other men.

Hopefully these guys will have had enough of themselves and rather than looking for someone external to blame, try to look for methods to help themselves.

 

But I do have to criticize this "only men can tell men what to do". I think male bonding is good. My perception though, is that some men lose sight of women as people and like men, some are worthy of respect where others aren't.

 

Another member sent me some links which discusses the narcissistic nature of many, where they're the center of the universe and everyone else supports them. That's the attitude that comes across with guys who believe that women aren't people or worthy of any respect.

[Woggle]

if women want respect they need show it and so many don't. I only respect those who respect me.

[Feelin Frisky]

I don't know what a PUA is but a proverbial "nice guy" has never meant a man who acts womanly--whatever that means. Are nice guys a turn off to you? That would place you into the category of one of those woman who think being a bad guy's bi_tch is some how romantic. Let me tell you something, if you ever studied "romanticism" in HS or College it is not all roses. There's lots of heartache, misery, violence and even murder intertwined into that quest for adventurous unpredictabilities.

 

Beautiful girls who are attracted to dangerous men or just insecure jerks who have to get themselves all tattted and pierced to give them some bought identity are turn offs to yours truly. To me a nice guy is simply that, a nice guy--someone who is not a doormat but is considerate of what he expects a nice girl to favor and tries do just that.

 

A fawning azzhole who wants to hand feed you and hold your cigarette while you toke it through his fingers is a fawning azzhole if that's what you mean by nice guys being womanly.

[Gero]

But I do have to criticize this "only men can tell men what to do". I think male bonding is good. My perception though, is that some men lose sight of women as people and like men, some are worthy of respect where others aren't.

 

All I know is that I respect people that deserve respect regardless of gender. If I have issues in terms of not being the "perfect man" I look to everyone for advice and help. The problem out there is that hardly any women want to help so called "nice guys" find themselves or whatever and instead avoid them like the plague.

 

If women want respect from guys then they should show respect for these guys and realize that they are people too and not toss them aside just because they don't meet up to their standards.

 

The so called nice guys show nothing but respect for women but unfortunately women reject this and thus they are forced to become *******s that the same women then complain about.

[TheLoneSock]

Hopefully these guys will have had enough of themselves and rather than looking for someone external to blame, try to look for methods to help themselves.

 

But I do have to criticize this "only men can tell men what to do". I think male bonding is good. My perception though, is that some men lose sight of women as people and like men, some are worthy of respect where others aren't.

 

Another member sent me some links which discusses the narcissistic nature of many, where they're the center of the universe and everyone else supports them. That's the attitude that comes across with guys who believe that women aren't people or worthy of any respect.

 

My opinion is that the best men are raised by a good mother and a good father. It does take two.

 

I think it's entirely possible for a woman to raise a boy into a man. Single mothers do it every day. Some even do it better. In fact, one need only look at history. For example, Achilles, Alexander the Great, Napoleon, all raised in large part by their mothers. All of them changed the very fabric of the world. All of them, incidentally, had a healthy dose of something... was it narcissism, or was it arrogance? Neither a desirable trait, but probably necessary for them to have accomplished what they did.

[threebyfate]

My opinion is that the best men are raised by a good mother and a good father. It does take two.

 

I think it's entirely possible for a woman to raise a boy into a man. Single mothers do it every day. Some even do it better. In fact, one need only look at history. For example, Achilles, Alexander the Great, Napoleon, all raised in large part by their mothers. All of them changed the very fabric of the world. All of them, incidentally, had a healthy dose of something... was it narcissism, or was it arrogance? Neither a desirable trait, but probably necessary for them to have accomplished what they did.

I'm giggling a bit thinking about this but historically, 99% of men were raised by their mothers since their fathers were too busy raiding the neighbors for food.

 

As well, consider the rest of the animal kingdom. Have you ever seen a pansy leopard or elephant? In both these animals, the father provides his sperm and wanders off.

[sally4sara]

I'll break it down for you, including the stoicism:

• Over-emotionalism.
  
• Whining.
  
• A lack of initiative.
  
• Irrational thinking.
  
• Mirroring.
  
• Next in a bitchy rather than shoulder shrugging way.
  
• Victim attitude.
  
• Disney princess expectations.
  
• Can't stand fat women but wants to be accepted for all of their flaws.
  
• Wants to be taken care of and protected.
  

AND worst of all:

• Passivity.
  

 

I don't like these traits in anybody. I don't view them to be female behaviors, male behaviors, anti male or anti female behaviors.

 

They are simply crappy behaviors (outside of the mirroring; that can be done and done to a result by anyone). Childish behaviors that become twice as annoying when found in an adult.

[Gero]

I'm giggling a bit thinking about this but historically, 99% of men were raised by their mothers since their fathers were too busy raiding the neighbors for food.

 

As well, consider the rest of the animal kingdom. Have you ever seen a pansy leopard or elephant? In both these animals, the father provides his sperm and wanders off.

 

You can't compare animals and people. Humans are far more complex and there are far more environmental influences on people than there are animals.

 

I think you're going a bit overboard on that 99% of men being raised by women thing. Plus in the past boys were considered men at much younger ages. These boys left the house in their early teens and learned how to become a man by joining their fathers and others in whatever endeavors they had.

 

Not too long ago there weren't child labor laws and all of that stuff to prevent such a thing.

[Crusoe]

I'm giggling a bit thinking about this but historically, 99% of men were raised by their mothers since their fathers were too busy raiding the neighbors for food.

 

As well, consider the rest of the animal kingdom. Have you ever seen a pansy leopard or elephant? In both these animals, the father provides his sperm and wanders off.

 

Yes, but Mummy leopard isn't wrapping her cub in cotton wool. She is exposing him to the big, hard, cruel wide world and teaching him how to survive. That doesn't happen much with humans any more.