girl suddenly doesn't want a relationship

[doomage]

So I've been dating a girl for almost a month now, we met at a party, and we did some things the first night i met her, now at first i really liked her but sometimes my feelings for her waver but i'm sticking it out, i could see myself going out with her, but anyway we've been dating, having sex holding hands being very affectionette, I naturally am and today she seemed alittle distant.

 

The conversation felt forced at first but i asked what was wrong and she said "nothing just thinking" so i said ok but i knew some was afoot, then she brought it up that she was thinking that she probably isn't ready to be in a relationship just yet but she wants to continue dating me, she always talks or talked about how her ex hurt her and other exs that hurt her and here i am what i think she needs and now she doesn't wanna go out. i asked her out last week which was dumb cuz we were both alittle tipsy her more, so it didn't work out for the best lol, but were still cool.

 

She said that she was talking to her friend which is a girl, and got into her head that she probably isn't ready to commit just yet.

it kinda irked me cuz this **** happens all the time, i'm always oopen to be in a relationship but the girls don't want to be in one with me.

She said the reason why was cuz she is afraid i will be like her ex and be all clingy, just because i'm affectionette like hugging her and holding her.

 

she said she still likes me and stuff, but she's not ready to commit just yet cuz i guess she's been hurt. You think she's bsing me, or just wants to let me down easy?

 

After we had that talk we were walking around school, and she suddenly was holding my hand, then i said "i'm not gonna be affectionette anymore" in a funny tone, i wasnt serious and i said i was just kidding and so i walked her to her car, and she texted me saying "you better not stop being affectionette to me or ill kill you lol"

 

so idk.....

[Star Gazer]

How old are you two?

 

I think to expect an exclusive relationship after a month is asking for too much. But that's just me.

[doomage]

I am 21 and she is 20, but idk in the back of my mind i feel as though it is bull**** because if a girl likes you there shouldn't be any second thoughts, if it was jacob from twilight asking her out you think she'll say "i don't think im ready just yet" f that she'll be like hell ya.

[USMCHokie]

So I've been dating a girl for almost a month now, we met at a party, and we did some things the first night i met her, now at first i really liked her but sometimes my feelings for her waver but i'm sticking it out, i could see myself going out with her, but anyway we've been dating, having sex holding hands being very affectionette, I naturally am and today she seemed alittle distant.

 

This seems like the two of you are trying to create some sort of relationship out of a first night hookup...I'm not saying that it can't work out, but I've been exactly where you are very recently...I met a girl at a party one night, had a great time with her, and spent the night...we tried dating for a few weeks but decided it wasn't going to work out...and that was that...

 

Don't try to force a relationship...you are still in the process of getting to know her, and if she is already bringing up this crap about commitment and not wanting to be in an exclusive relationship, then it's more likely than not that things aren't going to progress any further...it's ok to let them go, especially early on, when there really isn't anything that's keeping you together...

 

People who truly want to be with you won't bring up doubts or reservations of being with you...they'll just be with you...

[Star Gazer]

I am 21 and she is 20, but idk in the back of my mind i feel as though it is bull**** because if a girl likes you there shouldn't be any second thoughts, if it was jacob from twilight asking her out you think she'll say "i don't think im ready just yet" f that she'll be like hell ya.

 

Your first problem is comparing reality to a fictional werewolf character. That said, Bella did turn Jacob down ya know. Twice.

 

I can imagine myself liking someone in the future, and not being ready to commit to him because I'm still processing/healing. Very possible here too! Not everyone is willing to rush into a relationship. Slow and steady wins the race.

[doomage]

thanks you two, but usmc chokie, why didn't it workout with the girl you were seeing if you don't mind me asking?

 

Ya i'm trying not to force it, but she thougt i would never call her after that night, i guess since i'm still new at dating kind of, i know guys that have more experience than me would have left it at that, the first night, since she did go down on me the first night i met her, that's never happened to me bfore but i guess i just play it cool and see what happens.

[USMCHokie]

thanks you two, but usmc chokie, why didn't it workout with the girl you were seeing if you don't mind me asking?

 

About three weeks in, things seemed to be going really well, but suddenly she asked to slow things down...then we had a talk and she said she was rather ambivalent about a relationship and wasn't really in a place to commit to a relationship...so I said it was nice to have met her and good day...I'm not really sure of the real reason...but reasons don't matter...

[doomage]

Well thanks for the advice.

 

But I'm feeling kind of bitter at the moment, because i haven't heard from her the whole day pretty much and she flaked basically.

 

Last night i texted her and she took forever to text me back and basically she was drunk hanging out with her friends and didn't say much so i basically said "ok peace" and left it at that then today i texted her good morning like she does to me all the time and she took three hours to text back and all she said was "good morning" and i said "whats going on?" and she said "nothing much just gonna go cliff jumping" and then three hours later (because i was at work) i said "damn sounds like fun, well hit me back up when your not busy" and then after i got off work i said "hey lets meet up later i just got out of work" and she hasn't texted me back,

 

Plus last night i let her know if she wanted to come see a movie with me, and she said "what time" and i said "8" and she said "ill let you know" and she still hasn't so i'm pissed off and were supposed to go to a rave tomorrow, oh ya i forgot she is a raver, and thats not my scene but i said im open minded to try new things but now i rather not go.

 

looks like it's going downhill from here folks

[jessica29]

I think looking for a relationship with a girl meeting her only for few days is too early.Girls always love their single life within certain age and that should be in 18-23 yrs.So try to understand your girl what she want from you and give her time to understand you.I think that will be helpful to you.

Dating advice for women

[robdrm32]

Well thanks for the advice.

 

But I'm feeling kind of bitter at the moment, because i haven't heard from her the whole day pretty much and she flaked basically.

 

Last night i texted her and she took forever to text me back and basically she was drunk hanging out with her friends and didn't say much so i basically said "ok peace" and left it at that then today i texted her good morning like she does to me all the time and she took three hours to text back and all she said was "good morning" and i said "whats going on?" and she said "nothing much just gonna go cliff jumping" and then three hours later (because i was at work) i said "damn sounds like fun, well hit me back up when your not busy" and then after i got off work i said "hey lets meet up later i just got out of work" and she hasn't texted me back,

 

Plus last night i let her know if she wanted to come see a movie with me, and she said "what time" and i said "8" and she said "ill let you know" and she still hasn't so i'm pissed off and were supposed to go to a rave tomorrow, oh ya i forgot she is a raver, and thats not my scene but i said im open minded to try new things but now i rather not go.

 

looks like it's going downhill from here folks

 

Umm you really want to be dating someone who hooks up with you the first night you meet? And is a "raver"?

 

Thats a singles scene imo.

 

And you are getting kind of clingy, sorry to say i've been there myself.

 

Let her make the effort, if you don't hear from her within a few days just move on. You have to let her make the next move, you've made it obvious you want to see her and the ball is in her court.

[jessica_l]

I am confuse to think that are you in love with that girl?!!!! If so then forget about her because girls don't like those boys who fall in love to early. Make sure that she feel the same for you. Then you can proceed.

 

 

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