should I transfer colleges?

[Mikki Mars]

I mean I spend pretty much all last year getting drunk and being creepy, I have few friends at school, I can't get any of my friends to come to NYC to hang out and they only live in Jersey, CT, and Long Island. I haven't had sex with anyone, and have only hooked up with 1 girl once and never hung out with her again, after she came with me to a party and we briefly made out afterward. We met at some event that one of my few friends held but it wasn't a party, it was an extracurricular thing. I suspect that because I told him about the hookup the next morning and that the next morning after the hookup I texted her first thing, I could have come off needy.

 

I transferred there in fall 2008, took off spring 2009, and completed the 2009-2010 school year. I don't think my reputation is very good there, people in my frat don't really like me, no one ever invites me to join their group of friends or to hang out with their group of friends, barely anyone writes on my wall, and the only things I get invited to are things the whole frat does. I feel I've made a name for myself as a "creeper" and a weirdo, and I don't know if I can recover it, and I fear that friendships I may make with freshmen girls this year will be cockblocked by people who don't like me or don't invite me to hang out with them. My one close friend I made, this girl with a boyfriend, is transferring and no longer goes to my school.

 

I'll admit my mistakes, as they occurred because before this year, I didn't even have any superficial friends ever in my life before, never was in a relationship, never courted anyone nor was anyone ever semi-interested in me, and throughout high school all I was was bullied by everyone, and I did stupid things in HS probably related to my asperger's syndrome. So I basically had no social experience. In HS, I was used to rude rejections, not things like "oh I'll be back" while talking to them, nor did I get that when girls or people don't try to continue the conversation yet still answer with yeses or nos, is a rejection.

 

My mistakes at school this year were getting taken home early from most of the frat parties because I got too drunk, sent drunked facebook messages to like two girls, went to the club alone and hit on lotta girls hammered, and there was one girl who was interested somewhat but when she said we'd hang out (this was back in October), she didn't show up and I called/texted her over 10 times. At some frat parties, because I didn't know that if a girl says "i'll be right back" it means rejection, I would not pick up on rejection and follow them around, to the point where I heard about it from my "brothers," the same "brothers" who never reached out to me even before that happened to become close friends and introduce me to girls or girls to me so I wouldn't have to introduce myself.

 

To add to the problem, I am a poli sci major, one out of 50 that are at my school of 6000, most of the students are either business/marketing(guys) or "health science"/nursing (girls) and a lot of both are "media studies/film" majors. I come from NYC and used to live on the north shore of LI, most of my school is from Jersey, CT, Westchester, or the south shore of Long Island. Most of the kids are Irish/Italian and I'm a covert Jew. I mean I've never been accused of incorrect touching or rape at my school as I have not done those things, but its been said that I've come on too strong to too many people.

 

Should I transfer schools, and start fresh for spring 2011? I mean I have a better picture of things, as one of my brothers I did have a bunch of sit-downs with and he told me that I tried too hard to "force myself" onto others socially, and that I came off too eager to hang out. Should I also transfer to a school with more people who are interested in the same things I am, like having the same major, and plus I am interested in politics/the world and I read, no one at my schools does, and the only thing they care about is sports and popular culture.

Edited July 7, 2010 by Mikki Mars