potrzebie Posted July 6, 2010 Posted July 6, 2010 So, hello...quick question that I haven't seen on here: how do you reconcile different libidos when you're with someone who's great otherwise? Have been dating a wonderful person for three months and it's all going nicely except that he's always in pain so he doesn't always feel very much like being physical. I understand that and can sympathize, believe me, but i've always been very sexual and it's been very difficult to always be, er, waiting...I don't go this long without even when I'm "single!" How do other people compromise on this? I feel like there are things we could do to make it easier or less taxing on him, but I don't want him to feel pressured or inadequate....however, I also don't want to feel frustrated (there are only so many cold showers I can take, or baseball stats I can try to memorize!).
moxo Posted July 7, 2010 Posted July 7, 2010 You need to talk to him openly about it. Don't be confrontational or sound like your blaming him, just tell him how much you want to connect with him physically as well as emotionally and ask how you can help him to be more comfortable (ie not in pain) with sexual stuff. If all else fails, go solo if you get what I mean lol
Author potrzebie Posted July 7, 2010 Author Posted July 7, 2010 well, from what I understand, it's kind of like arthritis pain...
Author potrzebie Posted July 7, 2010 Author Posted July 7, 2010 You need to talk to him openly about it. Don't be confrontational or sound like your blaming him, just tell him how much you want to connect with him physically as well as emotionally and ask how you can help him to be more comfortable (ie not in pain) with sexual stuff. If all else fails, go solo if you get what I mean lol Yeah, I know we need to talk about it--especially because I really think it would be worth it to try to work out a compromise somehow...lol, I have tried going solo (after he falls asleep to avoid anything) and have wondered why we couldn't go solo together, if nothing else for now...ah, well, hopefully something will present itself. I know I can't pressure or anything as that would simply make things worse for both of us. But, I do hope to be able to discuss because I can't believe it's that cut and dried...
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