lovingagain Posted July 4, 2010 Posted July 4, 2010 OK my close friends have someone who is two faced. She talks about the husband behind his back and said she does not like him, said she would not be friends with them when they moved house. Recently I asked a favour of the close friend which slightly affected the other friend who is two faced, but he refused on the basis that he liked her and it could possibly affect her. Well she is not his friend, she does not like him at all. Do I tell what she said? It really affects me big time him thinking that she is a good friend when I know she is not, she hates him but likes his wife but all this on the basis that she visited them once recently after a year. Sounds childish but I am affected by the two faceness that is going on here big time as I am the real friend and she is not. Do I tell my close friends that she is two faced? Seems two faced not to tell but childish to tell. It seems a no win. If I tell I look bad, if I don't tell I feel crap. Actually I am answering this myself, I do nothing. I just leave it? But you can comment if you like.
vintagecat Posted July 4, 2010 Posted July 4, 2010 Leave it. Examine your motives carefully. Did you want to tell this man about the two faced woman's perfidy before you asked for the favor or only afterward when you didn't get what you wanted? I suspect he knows how she is anyway. To borrow a line from Edith Wharton's classic novel, The House of Mirth, "It's much safer to be fond of dangerous people." You should probably stay out of it unless you wish to take her on directly and all that this might entail. If you don't need these other friends and aren't dependent on the kindness of any of them then it might be worth the battle out of principle.
Author lovingagain Posted July 5, 2010 Author Posted July 5, 2010 My motives, I think I lose out bigtime. But no I won't say anything, they will realise in the end.
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