Hellboy Posted July 4, 2010 Posted July 4, 2010 Hi First post here. I split up with my ex July 16th 2009 but still sometimes struggle. We was only together for four months but she really really caught my off guard and I fell for her instantly. I felt so much for her. I still know her number off by heart and her full address. Everynow and again I would find pics of her on my pc or her kids (Now deleted) and I have scoured all my hard drives but cant find nothing. But lately I been having dreams about her. From what I remember I have had 3 dreams. But all 3 have made me waking up thinking about her again. She found another guy 1 week after we split and it hurts. She has not shown one ounce of thought over me since we split. Any advice on how to get over her would be great. I just want to stop the hurt and move on.
DustySaltus Posted July 4, 2010 Posted July 4, 2010 Anyone that truly cared for you would not be with someone else a week after you split. The truth is that she was probably doing things behind your back for a while. She cared more about her own needs than yours and more importantly the needs for a healthy relationship to flourish. The person that you thought she was and the person that she is are different. That shock is a trigger for pain. What she did was self serving and sneaky, you don't deserve that. As far as your own happiness, I always think back to the day before I reconnected with my ex. I was pretty happy with my life. I just worked on myself and tried to get things accomplished in my own life that I wasn't able to do while I was focusing all my energies on the relationship. I'm a better man for it. So while your out there making yourself a better person, someone else is doing the same thing out there for themselves. Eventually, you will find the way to each other and have a healthy, meaningful relationship which will make this bump in the road just a blip in the grand scheme of things.
Author Hellboy Posted July 4, 2010 Author Posted July 4, 2010 I think i dont miss her anymore. I mean a year is a long time to get over someone. But its the dreams. Why? I think deep down i have accepted I got cheated on and I have not seen her for a year but the dreams are so vivid.
BentSpine Posted July 4, 2010 Posted July 4, 2010 I mean a year is a long time to get over someone. But its the dreams. Why?It only means that you are sucessfully doing No Contact. Anniversaries bring back memories so a slight setbacks are to be expected at those occasions. Give it a couple of weeks and you'll be sleeping undisturbed again. You're fine.
spriggig Posted July 4, 2010 Posted July 4, 2010 In the morning, don't dwell on the dream, it will fade. Some people think that forgetting dreams is so common because that is exactly the point of dreams, to forget.
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