jessy1 Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 No matter how hard I try I just can't attract anyone Just had the guy of my dreams come to watch me perform. A guy I have loved for ages , a guy I dream of every day and night and I blew it. I messed the performace up completely Later I asked him round and he shot me down I am so sick of life right now. I am so lonely and depressed. What will I do now? What will I dream of at night and look forward to during the day? What will keep me going? I have nothing. I cant eat or sleep and I need help so bad coz I don't want to keep going. I just want him but he doesn't want me and neither does anyone else. I blew the only other thing I have in my life (my performing) and now Ive just had enough. I have nothing to dream for, or to live for really. I have had it with life right now. Im so sick of everything. I try so hard but for what reason? No one wants me coz im fat ugly and just a massive screw up. Had enough.
Author jessy1 Posted July 3, 2010 Author Posted July 3, 2010 Im so scared right now, I cant go to bed coz I will think about what a screw up I am. Im scared of myself. If I stop and get off this computer then my mind will wander to todays horrors and it will push me over the edge. Why cant things just work out for me? Why when I try so god dam hard does it always have to end this way. Im so scared
ahashakeheartbreak Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 (edited) OK, FIRST OF ALL: We are all have our down days, weeks, months. You are not alone, remember that. Second, STOP this thinking. It's hard to, I know, but it's not helpful. Think of what makes you happy. Even if it's just a certain song, listen to it, enjoy it, and think only of it. When you have a bad feeling coming on, go somewhere, talk to someone, do something, anything, and put your whole mind into it. You CAN control your thoughts to a certain extent. All this will pass. Things are never as bad as they seem, and you will realize that all you've said is not true...as for goals, are you going to school? Planning things with friends? Working? If you don't have anything to look forward to, then fix that. You do not need someone to like you or want you, that is not a NEED. Focus on building yourself and making yourself a better, postive person, and all those extra things that you want (someone special) will just fall into place eventually. But you can't just sit around and be sad and expect things to change. Because, they won't. You have to pull yourself together, fake confidence, and just move forward. Edited July 3, 2010 by ahashakeheartbreak
Gallaxia Posted July 7, 2010 Posted July 7, 2010 I try so hard but for what reason? For YOU. Do things for YOU! Seek to satisfy your soul. If it's through performing, then keep at it! You are every bit worth it. You know, sometimes we can be our own worst enemy. Everybody hits bumps now and then. If we didn't, this site surely wouldn't exist! And look how many of us posters there are! Alicia Keys fell during a performance on stage this weekend. Hey, you know what? It happens. But you know what you do when the unexpected knocks us down? you get back up, dust yourself off, and keep on truckin'. It's what makes you STRONGER. Don't ever think you're alone. Everybody hits bumps now and then. Just have patience and things will fall into place. Smile
TouchedByViolet Posted July 7, 2010 Posted July 7, 2010 Problem: Sounds like your self image is at rock bottom. Solution: GO TO THE GYM!! You will lose the weight you don't like, give your body a drive, improve your looks, feel better about yourself and be sexy before no time. Then go buy some hot clothes and the guys will be all over you. Easy as 1 2 3.
graywolf Posted July 7, 2010 Posted July 7, 2010 God gave you life. Enjoy that part of yourself, that you are alive right now and are able to walk, talk, eat, drink, do whatever it is you want. Because it sounds like you are a healthy person with all your limbs, a beating heart and a functioning brain. Why waste all that? The fact that your still breathing should always come to you as something worth being happy about. So look at the present, and get out there and do something. It should be fun. Perform to your hearts content, and if that doesn't go well, do something else. You'll find someone, I promise you this. But like many others say, you don't need that person to be happy. You just need yourself, some friends, and life. Don't have friends? Go make some and enjoy the 100 or so years that you have on this Earth.
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