in_limbo Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 (edited) My boyfriend for 6 months suddenly became distant last week. He wasn't replying to any of my text messages. He always had replied promptly. I accidentally met him somewhere too that day he wasn't replying to me. Imagine the surprise. I asked if everything was ok and I told him I got worried. He even looked annoyed. It was awkward that night. He was cold. All of a sudden there I was, the person he had been avoiding. He left before I did. I called him after he left and asked if we could talk so we met Sunday. When I saw him the next day, he said hi in a manner that suggested nothing happened. I asked what was wrong because he wasn't replying to my messages and he said there wasn't anything. He wasn't holding my hand and kept his hands in his pockets most of the time and crossed his arms a lot. I left him alone (NC) this week and last night I got a message from him asking me for dinner tonight to talk. He even asked me why I didn't show up at a common friend's going away dinner last night. Are we breaking up? Guys, when you suddenly turn cold towards your girlfriend, are you readying you both for a breakup? Edited July 3, 2010 by in_limbo
Tayla Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 Well I can say this, the non response from the members here may be a telling tale that you already have the answer. I personally have learned to consider men still behaving in *cave* time. Meaning Ladies not allowed in that space of their mind or emotions. ANd they call us ladies fickle. I give no reason to this behavior other then its their way. As to your situation, without knowing if this is a habit of his, its hard to give an objective answer. What does your instincts tell you? Usually intuition is right, so follow it.
Numb Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 Yes he is already gone trust me!! Stop calling him and move on.
Author in_limbo Posted July 3, 2010 Author Posted July 3, 2010 Argh. He cancelled dinner. I texted him 15 minutes after our arranged time to ask if we were still meeting up. He said he couldn't make it. I'm just like, get it over and done with.
Joe Normal Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 (edited) It looks fairly negative. I would just say that guys don't necessarily intend to show any kind of signal like this. They may just be acting this way because they are unhappy with some aspect of the relationship, it does not have to be calculated behaviour, it may just be instinctive and natural. So, I would recommend you talk to him and ask him what is bugging him. If it's something that you feel can be rectified, then consider doing that before you break up. However, there's a good chance it's something less innocent, e.g. him seeing another woman. In which case just break up. The thing is, it's best to find out before you break up, rather than breakup first when there may be a natural explanation. Edited July 3, 2010 by Joe Normal
Author in_limbo Posted July 4, 2010 Author Posted July 4, 2010 I'm fairly sure there isn't anyone else. He didn't arrange for another meet up after cancelling on me. He cancelled because he said he wasn't feeling well. Does not arranging for another meetup mean he wants more time? I even wonder if he's waiting for me to ask him out to talk. Should I initiate the meetup? I'm just afraid he'll just ignore my messages again just like he had last week. Of course, a huge part of me hopes this is not a breakup. I've found myself loving him all this time but I've never said it to him.
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