Author actuality Posted July 3, 2010 Author Posted July 3, 2010 That_ girl I agree with you. OP, it wasn't that the girl had been dragging you into an unnecessary, but you being a guy should have had the decency to make sure she was okay. Even if she had been a stranger. Were a fight to even ensue, the bouncer would have been there to break it up. The way you just walked away isn't any different from her not picking up your call. If you didn't feel like you had a right to at least get the guy off her back, then why do you think she has an obligation to pick up your call? I disagree. She is a grown woman and can make her own choices. All she had to do was tell the guy no. I don't owe this girl anything, I said good night to her, if that's not good enough for women then I'll just continue to jerk off.
trippi1432 Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 A multitude of problems here....21 year old female....bar....drinking.....older man....Lesson learned. Steer clear, don't text..don't call and consider yourself lucky. I GO to karaoke bars to sing....I leave with my friends...any guy who chats me up is already on the outs and I never give them my number (or real number that is if they are obnoxiously insistent).
D-Lish Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 I couldn't agree more. That is why I reacted the way I did above. The whole situation just doesn't make much sense to me. The only logical explanation I have come up with is she is an attention whore. Welcome to the dating scene I suppose. Sigh..... She's 21! And you're 32. She wasn't interested in either of you, just consider yourself the less creepy option in that situation.
Woggle Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 I read a story on AOL about the bassist from band called Madina Lake. He intervined when a man was getting physical with his wife and the guy beat him so bad he is missing an inch of his skull. I would bet everything I own that this woman is still with this guy and now this guy is fighting for his life because he wanted to be a hero. This is why men should mind our business.
D-Lish Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 I read a story on AOL about the bassist from band called Madina Lake. He intervined when a man was getting physical with his wife and the guy beat him so bad he is missing an inch of his skull. I would bet everything I own that this woman is still with this guy and now this guy is fighting for his life because he wanted to be a hero. This is why men should mind our business. I don't think it's about that as much as realizing a 21 year old party girl isn't going to be at all attracted to a 32 year old guy.
Author actuality Posted July 3, 2010 Author Posted July 3, 2010 I don't think it's about that as much as realizing a 21 year old party girl isn't going to be at all attracted to a 32 year old guy. That is funny, because she gave me her number then agreed to meet up sometime. And then the other guy was like 40 something. She was apparently interested in something, else she is a liar.
Ilovehim Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 maybe she expected you to stand up for her and save her from the creepy old man.. you just said 'good-night"--i'm guessing she took that as you didnt really give a crap about helping her out...
Diezel Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 Why didn't you even ask her if she was okay? I don't expect anyone to throw down over a stranger, but she tells you this guy is hasselling her, guy grabs her hand and drags her out of the bar, and the last thing you see is what looks like an argument between them. I would be concerned not annoyed in that situation. But you've made it all about you and how nice guys finish last. Maybe she is intentionally letting your call go to voicemail because she's just so worn out from the karoke drama or maybe she feels like you left her twisting in the wind. You don't sound very nice to me. A nice guy would have some concern for the girl, not make it all about him. I'm not saying you should have started something, but a "hey, is everything okay" sounds like it could have helped her out of a bad situation. Wow, this is just TERRIBLE. He walked past, and said GOOD NIGHT. If she was REALLY in trouble, she would have said something then and there. She was a stranger trying to pit 2 men (strangers to each other) against one another for ego validation purposes. That's all it was. I'm sorry, but as a former bartender, I saw many situations like this and I saw MANY a times when the White Knight would try to jump in and end up in a hospital for his trouble. Many a times as well, I'd be told that something was going on between two people and as soon as security would show up, the two people were fine and just having a "misunderstanding". If the OP had reacted and gotten stabbed, then you'd be saying: Awww poor guy. And he'd have a nice hospital bill to show for it. And to that other poor misguided girl: Bouncers are responsible for the patrons WITHIN the bar, not outside. The man clearly took the "lady" outside. Had something happened, the bouncers were never going to react in time, IF AT ALL. Sorry, but the OP took the correct course of action... well, ALMOST. See OP, you are partly to blame, because you saw SO MANY RED FLAGS... and decided to call her anyway. That was your mistake. As soon as you left that place, your job was to throw away that number and forget her.
alclarkey Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 Unless I was there right next to both of them the whole time to hear the conversation and observe, and unless the girl is screaming "rape!!" or "murder!!" then I will keep to my own business. Not doing so is a good way to get burned.
ecto-1 Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 One thing I hate about everyone having cell phones is that everyone EXPECTS everybody else to be at their beck and call. I rarely answer mine. This is silly reply. Here's an idea, throw your cell phone in the trash and cancel your subscription, save yourself some money.
ecto-1 Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 That is actually true. That's why I never wanted one to begin with. I had to get one when my car was breaking down all of the time. I rarely use it and only answer to people that I want to talk to. Man, another stupid response about not answering cell phones, go find a bridge to live under with Rumpleskilstkin, lol WHat kind of stupid response is, "I only answer the phone to people I want to talk to" Here's an idea, genius, don't give out your # to people you DON'T want to talk to.
theBrokenMuse Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 She didn't answer because she was looking for a KISA or a sucker and that was an abject failure so she has no reason to talk to you.
make me believe Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 So you met a girl at a bar (and she was probably drunker than you realized), got her number, and then she didn't return your call. Uh....this happens to everyone, male and female. I'm not understanding why it's such a big deal and why it means all women suck. She was out having fun and gave you her number while she was in the moment. That doesn't mean she's obligated to go on a date with you. It means she was drunk, having fun in the moment, and then reconsidered the next day when she sobered up. I agree with the people who said she likely knew the other guy, though. I'm not an assertive or aggressive person at all, but no way would I let some random 40 yr old guy that I didn't even know drag me out of a bar.
Gero Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 Man, another stupid response about not answering cell phones, go find a bridge to live under with Rumpleskilstkin, lol WHat kind of stupid response is, "I only answer the phone to people I want to talk to" Here's an idea, genius, don't give out your # to people you DON'T want to talk to. Thanks. That's actually what I do, but when it comes to family it's not always that easy. Especially annoying aunts and uncles and such.
TheLoneSock Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 (edited) This whole thread is nuts. Why there is confusion is beyond me. I don't care if you're Chuck god damn Norris; why would you EVER jump into the middle of a squabble between a girl you JUST met at a BAR, and a random guy you don't even know (but she clearly does) at 2 o' clock in the morning? Because you think she's cute? Because someone, somewhere thinks it would have been the chivalrous thing to do? What a joke. Anyone who fails to see the fallacy in that idea is living in la-la land. OP was smart to stay out of pointless trouble, but not smart to call her. The moral of this story is self explanatory. Edited July 3, 2010 by TheLoneSock typo
jason83 Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 #1 She is 21 years old #2 You met at a bar....rarely do those beginnings end well other than a simple hook up You didn't know her at all and don't know what the situation is or was between her and this guy. If I were in your shoes, I would have said something to a bouncer and left it at that. She sounds like nothing but drama, just like most girls that age are. Most...not all. Be careful and take this as a learning experience
PhillyDude Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 Most girls in bars are slightly retarded so try to meet women in other places like bookstores or supermarkets.
Green Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 This whole thread is nuts. Why there is confusion is beyond me. I don't care if you're Chuck god damn Norris; why would you EVER jump into the middle of a squabble between a girl you JUST met at a BAR, and a random guy you don't even know (but she clearly does) at 2 o' clock in the morning? Because you think she's cute? Because someone, somewhere thinks it would have been the chivalrous thing to do? What a joke. Anyone who fails to see the fallacy in that idea is living in la-la land. OP was smart to stay out of pointless trouble, but not smart to call her. The moral of this story is self explanatory. This post had me laughing like crazy. CAUSE ITS TRUE. Fact is you can't drag a drunk girl out to the dance floor let alone out of the bar unless she wants to.
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