dialeight Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 Hey Everyone, So recently I have started dating this girl, and it's been about a month and a half now. We both have agreed to try and take it slow, but things have progressed a bit faster than we both anticipated. I travel for work a lot and I really don't have a lot of time to spend with her, but when I do we both really enjoy each other, or so it seems from her end. When I got back into town last weekend, I stayed the night with her and we ended up having sex, and we both fell asleep together. The next morning after I left, I got a text message from her telling me how much she enjoyed everything and that it made her realize that she wants to be with me. So we made it official. Now that I'm in town for a couple of weeks, she really doesn't seem to want to see me more than a couple of hours like every other day. Like we get together for lunch and then go our separate ways. In past relationships I have always rushed into things and the girl and I at the time spent every waking hour together. So this is different for me, and I'm having a hard time adjusting. I guess what I am looking for here is to try and find out if this is a game or not. There are a lot of things that tell me that this is not a game. Examples being: - She was willing to meet the family - She has paid for things, and will not let me pay for everything - She talks to me at least twice daily, on top of a good morning and good night text. - She tells me all the time how much she likes me - She sends me random text messages saying that she misses me or is thinking of me. - There are others, just can't think of them. Now the reason I think it might be a game is because: - She is really limiting her time with me - She has told me that other guys have feelings for her, but claims she rejects them Am I just being stupid and paranoid? I mean looking at the list above it seems like I've got a pretty sweet deal here. I do have issues with jealousy and I guess you could call it separation anxiety, because when I don't hear from her in a while I get really anxious, and I'm not sure how to control it, if there are any suggestions on that from someone, it would be appreciated. Thoughts please? Thanks
Serenitynow Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 Are you both off when you get together for lunch ? free for the day but she just wants lunch ? Do you try to make plans to do other stuff before or after the lunch ?
Author dialeight Posted July 3, 2010 Author Posted July 3, 2010 I wouldn't say we are off, sometimes she is quiet, but she is kind of that way anyways. Plus she says it's her "Weekday" mood. She is really busy right now and has a class she is studying for diligently. Yesterday after lunch she asked me what I was going to do and I told her that I was going to go work for a little bit but she could come in for a little while before I started working. Then she said she would let me do my thing and she was going to go home and study. I got upset with her yesterday evening because it only seemed liked she wanted to do lunch and that was it. We are planning on spending Sunday together though, right now I told her that I need some time to reorganize my thoughts.
that girl Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 I think you might be being a little paranoid. It sounds like yesterday you met for lunch, said you needed to work, but wanted her to take up your offer to hang out for a little while. Frankly, I think a lot of people would turn that down, particularly if you weren't eating lunch on the same block where you live. It works out well for you, hang out with me until I'm ready to work, but she'd kind of be trailing along after you.
Author dialeight Posted July 3, 2010 Author Posted July 3, 2010 Thanks for pointing that out. I'm not really good at this whole dating thing, and I've have told her that. I understand clearly what you are saying and it makes perfect sense. Yes I am being paranoid because I really like this girl and I don't want to lose her! Do I need to continue just giving her the space she needs since she is so busy and trust that everything is fine?
that girl Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 I'm not getting why you think she needs space. Is she turning down dates? It sounds like you might be expecting her to kind of chase after you and want to spend every possible second together, even if it means she goes out of her way to spend 10 mins with her.
Diezel Posted July 3, 2010 Posted July 3, 2010 So everything was fine... until you two became official. NOTICE HOW THAT WORKED OUT? Just think about it... when did these "problems" begin to start become noticeable. He's NOT being paranoid. She should NOT be acting like this in the second month. They should still be all LOVEY DOVEY at this stage.
Author dialeight Posted July 3, 2010 Author Posted July 3, 2010 Well I'm not sure that she needs space, but she has mentioned that she feels a bit pressured. So I'm taking that as I need to back off a bit. It is interesting that things have happened the way they have, but at the same time she just started a 2 week class, so she is really pressed for time right now. She has been spending a lot of time at home studying. Interesting though, She swore up and down that she was not going to talk to me at all today and tomorrow so we had some space, but she literally just called as I started typing this. Guess that kind of means something.
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