Loquacious Miss L. Posted June 30, 2010 Posted June 30, 2010 Here's the long and the short of it: I met a guy about a month ago and we hit it off pretty well. He was nice, kind, funny, considerate, etc. I knew a couple of things going into our "dating," that I suppose bothered me but I was trying to overlook--- 1. He was separated, not divorced. 2. He had no car. 3. He lived at home. Straight out of the gate those things bothered me but like I said, I was trying not to be superficial and thought maybe he was just down on his luck and in a bad situation with the economy being so bad and such. But as we continued to hang out, I had this nagging feeling that told me I WASN'T okay with his present circumstances, especially the whole "I'm separated but haven't filed" thing. Especially considering the last guy I dated before that was also separated. At first I thought that the most recent guy was different in that he sounded emotionally removed from his ex wife, etc. Anyway, the other day I called it off with him. I told him that it was because I just wasn't comfortable getting to like him and such and putting myself out there because of his circumstances. He said he understood. Now here it is a few days later and I feel like crap. And I also feel good in a way. But I feel like crap because doing what's best for me means that I am having to go back to the freakin drawing board again. But, I guess somewhere deep inside I knew it wouldn't work with this guy....but for some reason I'm still bummed about the situation.
Serenitynow Posted June 30, 2010 Posted June 30, 2010 Now here it is a few days later and I feel like crap. Well its no ones fault but your own for being in the state of mind you are in. I am seriously thinking of quitting my job and moving back in with my parents, it seems that's the hot thing that attracts women these days
Diezel Posted June 30, 2010 Posted June 30, 2010 First of all, he lives at home? Would you rather he live in a cardboard box? Okay, in all seriousness.... What's the underlying point to this thread. You already dealt with the situation. You already know the outcome. You know it was the right thing. So what is it really that you are asking for here? See, what I think is going on is that you are upset right now because you have no one in your life. Maybe start asking yourself, why am I attracted to separated men!? Kudos to breaking it off though. I find that most "separated" men are happily married that merely disguise their situation to benefit them with short term flings. Whether that was or wasn't you, hopefully you'll never have to find out.
Author Loquacious Miss L. Posted June 30, 2010 Author Posted June 30, 2010 Diezel, I think you hit it on the head. I guess I just wanted validation that I made the right choice, even if that validation is hard hitting. It does get old meeting/attracting the same kind of guy over and over again. I don't know how to "change" that, as you don't necessarily know the second you meet someone about the aforementioned circumstances. Grrr. But yeah I suppose you didn't tell me something I didn't already know. Thanks.
callalilly Posted July 1, 2010 Posted July 1, 2010 I think his response is pretty much all the confirmation you need. If he was truly ready to move on, he wouldn't have let you go.
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