daddypop1 Posted June 29, 2010 Posted June 29, 2010 Seriously, why is my wife telling me that she loves and misses me and wants to connect with me. Then she says we will talk later and goes back to her boyfriend. She says she keeps having feelings for me and doesnt know if it is her missing the past. Also doesnt think the feeling are ever going away. She says she is confused and trying to find her place in this world and grow. This has happened a few times where she is missing me and goes right back to him. Says they dont have any problems like we do and he has been great to her. I am so frustrated....
habs53 Posted June 30, 2010 Posted June 30, 2010 Seriously, why is my wife telling me that she loves and misses me and wants to connect with me. Then she says we will talk later and goes back to her boyfriend. She says she keeps having feelings for me and doesnt know if it is her missing the past. Also doesnt think the feeling are ever going away. She says she is confused and trying to find her place in this world and grow. This has happened a few times where she is missing me and goes right back to him. Says they dont have any problems like we do and he has been great to her. I am so frustrated.... ewww why would you want her back
dreamingoftigers Posted June 30, 2010 Posted June 30, 2010 Seriously, why is my wife telling me that she loves and misses me and wants to connect with me. Then she says we will talk later and goes back to her boyfriend. She says she keeps having feelings for me and doesnt know if it is her missing the past. Also doesnt think the feeling are ever going away. She says she is confused and trying to find her place in this world and grow. This has happened a few times where she is missing me and goes right back to him. Says they dont have any problems like we do and he has been great to her. I am so frustrated.... This is her way of keeping you on ice until she gets sick of him. Think about it, both guys are on their best behaviour trying to get her away from the other one. She's having a blast and getting everything her way. i wouldn't let her walk on you like this. Tell her that since things are going so great that if she wants to actually solve the problems you and she have that she will have to dump the bf and head to MC. Otherwise file for D. It sucks but **** or get off of the pot. Don't let her live your life for you, especially when she is not respecting you. You may have done some ****ty things, but that never justifies starting a relationship with someone else while still being in one. Does she think that this will solve any problems? Especially her marital ones?
HopelessinDTW Posted June 30, 2010 Posted June 30, 2010 i agree with every comments above. She's just playing. It's like you give a kid two toys, and you say you can only keep one. But the kid insists on having both...you say NO only one. she's acting like a kid...you deserve better. just end it...and do your best to move on. You shouldn't live through this rollercoaster ride!
LisaUk Posted June 30, 2010 Posted June 30, 2010 Yep, Dreamingof Tigers is correct, this is what is known on LS as "cakeeating", a very difficult concept to get your head around at first! When I first came here a year ago, I used to advise people that their spouses were confused. I was wrong. I have seen this time and time again, she's playing you in case the relationship with OM does not work out. Think about it for a min, she left you, but she made sure she had someone to go to, to take care of her emotionally, first. She is making sure this relationship will sustain her needs and desires before she lets you go. Sick isn't it? I know you love her, I get that, but try very hard to think about the reality of the type of person she is, who would do this? Would you EVER traet someone this way? Asking yourself this question is the door to your recovery from this...you deserve better.
HopelessinDTW Posted June 30, 2010 Posted June 30, 2010 Yep, Dreamingof Tigers is correct, this is what is known on LS as "cakeeating", a very difficult concept to get your head around at first! When I first came here a year ago, I used to advise people that their spouses were confused. I was wrong. I have seen this time and time again, she's playing you in case the relationship with OM does not work out. Think about it for a min, she left you, but she made sure she had someone to go to, to take care of her emotionally, first. She is making sure this relationship will sustain her needs and desires before she lets you go. Sick isn't it? I know you love her, I get that, but try very hard to think about the reality of the type of person she is, who would do this? Would you EVER traet someone this way? Asking yourself this question is the door to your recovery from this...you deserve better. interesting...i think this is what my stbx was doing to me initially. She tried to string me along long enough, and keep me in a cloud, until she knew for sure the OM was in. But, I found out about the whole thing early on, and messed up her master plan. She fessed up about having divorce being the only option, but never admitted having an affair until I busted her.
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