msdaisy Posted June 26, 2010 Posted June 26, 2010 Hello, I have a bit of a dilemma. I am 20 (nearly 21) and I have been dating my wonderful boyfriend for about 2 years. I have a great relationship in every way, except one-- our sex life. He and I have talked before about being in an open relationship. I told him that I didn't have a problem with it. I don't know if he's taken me up on this offer. I haven't done anything. Anyway, with that said..... I started a summer class awhile ago. The class is taught by a grad student and he's only 3 years older than me. I am very attracted to him. He and I see each other every day, expect weekend due to classes. I go to office hours just to see him. He and I talk about a bunch of stuff besides the class. I flirt with him if we are alone together. He doesn't seem to be upset about the extra attention. My school's rules about dating a teacher say that it's allowed as long as the teacher doesn't grade that student's work. Anywho, any suggestions on how to proceed?
alyssatranswarrior Posted June 26, 2010 Posted June 26, 2010 Why is your sexlife with your "wonderful boyfriend" bad? Im curious and whose idea is the open relationship. If it isnt strictly an open relationship yet, in strict certain terms (talking about it and being open to the idea doesnt make it a direct decision), to act on your desire would be cheating in his eyes.
Author msdaisy Posted June 26, 2010 Author Posted June 26, 2010 Why is your sexlife with your "wonderful boyfriend" bad? Im curious and whose idea is the open relationship. If it isnt strictly an open relationship yet, in strict certain terms (talking about it and being open to the idea doesnt make it a direct decision), to act on your desire would be cheating in his eyes. It isn't good, because it's only about him when we have sex. In the two years we've been together and having sex fairly frequently, I've never had an orgasm. I've tried talking to him about it. I've tried different things with him, but nothing works. It's just not that great... for me. He likes it just fine. I'm left constantly frustrated. It was his idea for the open relationship. I don't party, but he does. He wanted to be able to go to a party and not have any regrets should anything happen. He is a good guy. And I do love him. Honestly, I doubt anything is going to happen with this teacher. I just want to have a good time. It's just a crush I can't shake.
bolase Posted June 27, 2010 Posted June 27, 2010 I think if he hasn't tried to make you come in 2 years (hard enough to succeed, anyway) you will always be frustrated. He wants an open relationship so that if something happens at a party, he won't feel bad about it? Is that love and trust to you? It sounds like he wants a free pass to sleep with other girls. If you are okay with that, well okay...but if you want better, I would think about ending your current and giving yourself a shot at a new 'something with your tutor.
that girl Posted June 27, 2010 Posted June 27, 2010 Can you cum by yourself? Have you cum with other guys? It really sounds like you should probably dump the boyfriend, but I'd make an exception if you've never had an orgasm in your life. It might just be something you two need to work on in a more concentrated way. But stay the hell away from your TA. First, TAs do normally grade the students work, so you likely would be breaking the rules. Second, people who sleep with their TAs/Profs tend to get a reputation for screwing for grades even when it isn't true.
LSNoob Posted June 27, 2010 Posted June 27, 2010 Do you think your bf can solve this sexual problem?? Do you think he can overcome this obstacle and be able to give you orgasms?? If yes he can, and he just wont try to in the first place, then I'm sorry to tell you but you have a lousy bf. Get rid of the current bf and go for who ever you like. Wish you luck.
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