bigsby2010 Posted June 26, 2010 Posted June 26, 2010 (edited) Well first of all I'll paste a little background info here: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?t=235603 Basically I feel unwanted, played with, etc. It sucks having a girlfriend who can't tell you what's really on their mind. So lately I've put the pressure on her , as is indicated in my post I've been very patient with her to see if she's going to put any effort in. Too patient. I think that since I can't really discuss my feelings with her, the whole situation that happened in my car ( which I wrote about in the link ) was the last bit of effort I could have put in. I asked her if she wanted this, etc. She told me to text her when I got home and I did but she didn't ever respond. She could have been asleep though, it was late. But regardless, she didn't initiate any contact since (almost 36 hours ago). During this time of silence she's out getting *****faced and I have all these crappy thoughts going through my mind, probably because I don't want to lose her but man I realize it takes two. I can't picture her with another guy, we live in a small area where word travels fast and I'll be bumping into her. I figured I'd wait until Sunday to see if she made any last ditch effort for me after what happened the other night in my car. I didn't set this ultimatum with her or anything, I just keep trying to tell myself that I have to set some kind of timelines here, because she's most likely out getting *****faced and shopping around for other dudes. It sucks, in ways I wish she would just cut me loose so I know there was nothing I could have done about it instead of constantly pushing me to my limits. It would be a huge relief for her to dump me right now so that I wouldn't have to do it to someone who I still love. She clearly doesn't love me! She's so shady, I've seen her use her breakups in the past (she's never done the dumping) to get attention and pitty from other guys. I didn't want to give her that satisfaction. I've been waking up for weeks now, every day, in a mess. Usually as the day progresses I'll be OK, but there are definitely some rough patches during some days. I don't know if I'm becoming depressed or not. I just know she's gonna find a dude and find one fast, I'm strongly physically attracted to her still so I can't get these thoughts out of my mind. She's extremely outgoing, a flirt, attractive, high sex drive etc. She's always on the social scene and I've been trying to stay away from the bars, etc. because I'm afraid as hell as to what I'm gonna see. and I repeat..... We're not even broke up yet!!! but basically I see us as broke up, I'm just waiting until tomorrow to make the last phone call. Then I can finally get her off my facebook, get rid of that "In a relationship with_____ " etc. It's a hard time for me, I know this is a bit lengthy and quite a rant, but I appreciate some support. I'm home for the summer from university and not many of my friends are around, which I'm not used to. I just don't know how someone can disrespect you so much and then still not have the respect or decency to tell them the truth. I don't know how I'm gonna get over her, I just want things to be the way they were before. Edited June 26, 2010 by bigsby2010
Treasa Posted June 26, 2010 Posted June 26, 2010 So... 1. She doesn't have conflict well. 2. She's ignoring you and going out and doing other things. 3. She'll probably try to find another dude quickly. 4. She's not returning your affection. This does not sound like a quality woman, no matter how much you love her and are attracted to her. I'd say assume it's over and initiate no contact. I was so in love with my recent ex that I would have done almost anything for him. And then I started slowly realizing all the poisonous things he did during our relationship, and how toxic it was. When you're in a relationship, you shouldn't feel anxious or unhappy. If you do, run like hell. I know right now she's the only one you want. But if you take a step back and take some time away from her, I think you'll start to see her for what she is.
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