jessy1 Posted June 26, 2010 Posted June 26, 2010 So as per usual im confused!!!! Ive finally meet a guy who im super keen on! From what Ive heard & witnessed he seems to be just what im looking for. I have only meet him twice while others were around but we got on really well. His bestfriend (who is also good friends with me) saw him last weekend and told me he was was asking about me and told all his friends he had meet a new girl he was really keen on. However his best friend tells me he is extremelly shy around girls and would never make the first move. Anyway at the start of the week past (Sunday) he txt me and asked me If I wanted to catch up with him this coming week. I was stoked and just replied that this week would be great and asked him when would be a good time for him. Yet he never replied. So I left it (didnt want to harrase him) and didn't hear a thing till Friday morning where he left a comment on my facebook site saying good luck for my exam that day. So after my exam that evening I sent him a brief txt saying sorry I hadn't been in touch much, was just finishing exams and asked him if he was still keen to catch up. Again no reply!!! Why would you ask someone to catch up with you then not follow through with it?? Im really confused!! Do I just let this one go? Any advice would be great, thanks so much
Diezel Posted June 26, 2010 Posted June 26, 2010 First of all, never listen to other friends when it comes to "Hey, he might like you". A lot of the times, friends are simply stretching out the truth. Here's what happened, you might have been a little keen on this guy, but when your friend gave you that little extra info, you invested yourself emotionally on an outcome that hasn't taken place. Now you feel letdown even though NOTHING has happened. Do you think that if this guy were REALLY interested in you that he would let this amount of time go by without a formal invite? You basically gave a free date #1 to him and he didn't bite. I say, simply don't worry about this guy anymore. If he wants to make a move, he will within the next few days, but so far, he's shown me nothing in your post to indicate interest on his behalf. You texted him twice. That's enough. It's either his move or no move.
Author jessy1 Posted June 27, 2010 Author Posted June 27, 2010 Thanks for your reply Now i need more advice and fast!!!!!!! So the second I posted this last night he sent me a txt! (always the way, I know) anyway he asked if I wanted to meet up in town so I threw some clothes on and managed to find a mate to get there with eventually. When I got to town I txt him where I was and he said he was on his way, however literally seconds later my mate threw a tantrum as some guys were giving her a hard time and insisted on leaving. She was my ride home and I couldn't convince her to stay at all! So i had to leave. I txt him straight away and explained but I felt soooooooooo bad!! He was on his way and everything. He seemed fine with it but I have never felt so bad!!!! Anyway im going out with some mates 2nyt for a drink, should I ask him along? Or just leave it? Is there anything I can do to make the situation better? I no this sounds silly but im really lost for words so if you could reply that would be a maaaaaaaaaaaaaaassive help!!!!!
bolase Posted June 27, 2010 Posted June 27, 2010 Yes, you had to cancel the other time, so the right thing to do is to tell him you're going out, you won't be kidnapped and taken home this time, make a joke of it if you like, and ask him to let you know if he's around so you guys could finally have a drink. That doesnt mean youre making a commitment or telling him youre really interested, just that you want to meet up..nothing to be shy about. As friends - until you see whether he's keen. He's not going to assume youre really into him, just that youre making up for cancelling. Do it!
Author jessy1 Posted June 27, 2010 Author Posted June 27, 2010 Hey Bolase Thankyou so much! I only cancelled once with him (last night). So your sure its not to much if I give him a txt tonight? How would I word it? just say im out at such and such a place and if hes in the area hes welcome to come over for a drink? I've actually got shaking hands and nerves just thinking about it, god im useless
Diezel Posted June 27, 2010 Posted June 27, 2010 Stop the texting. Just CALL him. He might think: Oh yeah, another text, I'll go over there and then another text cancelling. It's what I would think. If I got a CALL instead and heard a voice, I'd feel more of a sense of "connect" and that it would the plans WOULD go through.
Author jessy1 Posted June 27, 2010 Author Posted June 27, 2010 Ok i'll call But you don't think its to much after last night? And also if you were in his situation would u want me to try and make up for it or just leave you be?! I only cancelled once btw and it really wasn't my fault, i told him how bad I felt and that i was really really sorry!!!
harkkam Posted June 27, 2010 Posted June 27, 2010 As a guy I would appreciate a call. I know not showing up and canceling was out of your control but a call will show that you are serious and he will like it that you did something that girls are afraid of doing. CALL in my opinion
Diezel Posted June 27, 2010 Posted June 27, 2010 If it were me, you'd better make it up to me. And if it were me (again), it wouldn't be too much. This way you can clear the air much faster and make it up to him for last night. Men tend to think that women flake for ANYTHING and he might think this was the case. But this way, you are clearly demonstrating that you are making the effort to see him.
bolase Posted June 27, 2010 Posted June 27, 2010 Hey Bolase Thankyou so much! I only cancelled once with him (last night). So your sure its not to much if I give him a txt tonight? How would I word it? just say im out at such and such a place and if hes in the area hes welcome to come over for a drink? exactly this! and have a drink before he gets there..
Author jessy1 Posted June 27, 2010 Author Posted June 27, 2010 Thanks so much I worked up the courage to call but no one answered. Hopefuly hes not mad and ignoring me! Thanks again for the advice, will keep you updated!
Author jessy1 Posted June 27, 2010 Author Posted June 27, 2010 Ahh I hate the dating game!! I rung him, no answer So left a message saying that I hoped the rest of his night went well and again I aplolgise for having the leave and then said he was welcome to come over at anytime. Yet he ignored me again!!! Im actually starting to get really upset over it all. I can't help but blame myself for everything. I actually feel sick to my stomach
callalilly Posted June 28, 2010 Posted June 28, 2010 Awww Jessyy, don't apologize anymore. You've more than made it clear that the missed date was out of your control and that you're still genuinely interested. I think the ball is definitely in his court now. Just try to get your mind on something else, and if he calls back eventually, you can be pleasantly surprised.
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