cdubs32 Posted June 25, 2010 Posted June 25, 2010 Anyone else use this site? I was using match.com for a year and it made me HATE dating. This site seems like a lot more fun with all the questions, and I'm noticing a WAY better response rate already than I ever had on match. The only bad thing I notice so far is that there is a major abundance of extremely fat girls on this site. I mean wow, there's a TON of them. It's all good, I probably won't go on any dates but maybe I can make some new friends or something. Best thing about it, it's FREE!!
Morals Posted June 25, 2010 Posted June 25, 2010 I've been very suspicious of the dating sites. I've heard too many horror stories about them to ever go on them as a male. Mainly I've heard stories of paid profiles enticing people to stay on for another subscription period or what not. Or stories of people getting "matched" only when they decide to cancel their account and have little time left on it, (in order to entice them to stay longer). In the end these paid dating sites are a business, and businesses are out to make money, and unfortunately a non-regulated business. What this means is there is no way to really check the validity of any claims of fake profiles. Not to mention but in most online dating sites the ratio is skewwed in favor of women. Women who use the sites are usually much happier with the results then men. Women have the power of choice in online situations, and therefore are able to not only be pickier, but also never have too few options. Men on the other hand, are constantly unhappy with the results because there are very few "initial" contacts by women, and like the poster above said: a lot of the women in these sites are unhealthily overweight.
Sivok Posted June 25, 2010 Posted June 25, 2010 Your chances are much better and it's alot funner to get numbers in the real world with girls you actually would date. Unless you have the looks of a model and personality to match, you really don't have much of a chance of scoring with the 1/1000 hot girls on cupid/etc. The fact that those girls receive 30 messages a day and the anonymity of it all makes your chances near nil. It's flashier than match.com, but your response rates are going to be the same. The only site I feel I've been getting dates from is plenty of fish
Stung Posted June 25, 2010 Posted June 25, 2010 Well, I met my husband on OkCupid, so I have a soft spot for the site. Of course, I am morbidly obese with very little to offer to offer the world other than my vacuous stare, and my husband is a billionaire Playgirl centerfold with a heart of gold and a 9 inch c*ck.
pandagirl Posted June 25, 2010 Posted June 25, 2010 I met my boyfriend on OKCupid. I liked the site. There were a lot of people, and it seemed to take itself way less seriously than Match or eHarmony. There was a sense of humor to the site, which gave it a laidback feeling.
kalikula Posted June 25, 2010 Posted June 25, 2010 I met the guy I'm dating on OK Cupid. I like the instant chat feature- he just IMed me, never sent me a cheesy message or anything. Of course, he was the ONE person I talked to-- his profile pic wasn't that cute (I think it was an unflattering angle) but he didn't seem creepy/desperate like most of the other people that talked to me
Author cdubs32 Posted June 25, 2010 Author Posted June 25, 2010 I've been very suspicious of the dating sites. I've heard too many horror stories about them to ever go on them as a male. I'd be much more horrified as a female. It's rather safe for a man. Worst case scenario she's a psychopath, in which you just walk away and never talk to her again. Not sure where the fear is coming from. Women on the otherhand: more easily raped. Mainly I've heard stories of paid profiles enticing people to stay on for another subscription period or what not. Or stories of people getting "matched" only when they decide to cancel their account and have little time left on it, (in order to entice them to stay longer). Never had this happen to me in all the time I've done online dating. No one ever asked me to prolong my subscription, never was even discussed. Everytime I cancel it just is....cancelled. In the end these paid dating sites are a business, and businesses are out to make money, and unfortunately a non-regulated business. What this means is there is no way to really check the validity of any claims of fake profiles. Thing about business (I've been in high end technology sales for 5 years) is that people have good memories and people talk. You start running a shady internet business to make a few extra bucks, you're hurting yourself more than you think. Of the more common, popular, legit dating sites, I don't think I've ever run into a "fake" profile unless it was a spammer and it was removed immediately. Not sure what sites you've been lookin at dude. Not to mention but in most online dating sites the ratio is skewwed in favor of women. Women who use the sites are usually much happier with the results then men. Women have the power of choice in online situations, and therefore are able to not only be pickier, but also never have too few options. Here is the only correct statement you've made so far. Yes, most dating sites are skewed men to women, but despite low response rates, I've heard/read that I've done much better than the average male as many of the dudes are...how do you say....losers? creepy? 40 year old fat bald men? Men on the other hand, are constantly unhappy with the results because there are very few "initial" contacts by women, and like the poster above said: a lot of the women in these sites are unhealthily overweight. This is true. see bold above
Confusedalways Posted June 25, 2010 Posted June 25, 2010 I don't actually use it, but I love the quizzes The people who show up on my matches actually look like they'd be people i'd be interested in, but since my prof isn't filled out and I don't have a pic up I've never tried to contact anyone from it. I do like the concept of the questions though!
Author cdubs32 Posted June 25, 2010 Author Posted June 25, 2010 Your chances are much better and it's alot funner to get numbers in the real world with girls you actually would date. Unless you have the looks of a model and personality to match, you really don't have much of a chance of scoring with the 1/1000 hot girls on cupid/etc. The fact that those girls receive 30 messages a day and the anonymity of it all makes your chances near nil. It's flashier than match.com, but your response rates are going to be the same. The only site I feel I've been getting dates from is plenty of fish Thanks for the insight, I don't have high expectations of ever really finding anyone meaningful. I just think it's a fun site. I met my boyfriend on OKCupid. I liked the site. There were a lot of people, and it seemed to take itself way less seriously than Match or eHarmony. There was a sense of humor to the site, which gave it a laidback feeling. I met the guy I'm dating on OK Cupid. I like the instant chat feature- he just IMed me, never sent me a cheesy message or anything. Of course, he was the ONE person I talked to-- his profile pic wasn't that cute (I think it was an unflattering angle) but he didn't seem creepy/desperate like most of the other people that talked to me I notice whenever there's posts like these on message board with the "I met my boyfriend online dating", you NEVER hear of a man saying "I met my girlfriend online dating" simply because it's much more rare for a dude to meet a meaningful woman online unlike a previous poster said "a good looking supermodel dude" which I'm not. Oh well, sometimes relationships annoy me anyways. Eventhough I want to make someone happy someday and I feel like I have a lot to offer, none of that really matters to anyone, and I can be happy doing other things.
Morals Posted June 25, 2010 Posted June 25, 2010 I've been very suspicious of the dating sites. I've heard too many horror stories about them to ever go on them as a male. I'd be much more horrified as a female. It's rather safe for a man. Worst case scenario she's a psychopath, in which you just walk away and never talk to her again. Not sure where the fear is coming from. Women on the otherhand: more easily raped. Mainly I've heard stories of paid profiles enticing people to stay on for another subscription period or what not. Or stories of people getting "matched" only when they decide to cancel their account and have little time left on it, (in order to entice them to stay longer). Never had this happen to me in all the time I've done online dating. No one ever asked me to prolong my subscription, never was even discussed. Everytime I cancel it just is....cancelled. In the end these paid dating sites are a business, and businesses are out to make money, and unfortunately a non-regulated business. What this means is there is no way to really check the validity of any claims of fake profiles. Thing about business (I've been in high end technology sales for 5 years) is that people have good memories and people talk. You start running a shady internet business to make a few extra bucks, you're hurting yourself more than you think. Of the more common, popular, legit dating sites, I don't think I've ever run into a "fake" profile unless it was a spammer and it was removed immediately. Not sure what sites you've been lookin at dude. Not to mention but in most online dating sites the ratio is skewwed in favor of women. Women who use the sites are usually much happier with the results then men. Women have the power of choice in online situations, and therefore are able to not only be pickier, but also never have too few options. Here is the only correct statement you've made so far. Yes, most dating sites are skewed men to women, but despite low response rates, I've heard/read that I've done much better than the average male as many of the dudes are...how do you say....losers? creepy? 40 year old fat bald men? Men on the other hand, are constantly unhappy with the results because there are very few "initial" contacts by women, and like the poster above said: a lot of the women in these sites are unhealthily overweight. This is true. It's better to break up the quote and post a response below each break in the quote then it is to make bolded comments. Just saying...Also on the topic of "Here is the only correct statement you've made so far". These are my opinions, I'm not here to ask for your validation of my opinions. You can have those opinions, but expressing them in such a manner is far ruder then anything I may have posted so far. In response to your diatribe: What is "safe" for a man? To go on a first-date meeting with a girl he met online, only to find out she's a psycho stalker? Oh, you mean the idea that a women is far easily raped. Hmm, so apparently in your opinion the only bad side of meeting someone is the possibility of getting raped. Trust me, there are some equally disturbing first-dates I've been on as a result of meeting someone online. And horror stories aren't just relegated to a "fear" of something. It could just be something that becomes a "turn-off" or a "unwillingness" to use the sites services again. Not everything is black and white you like you try and make it out to be. On the topic of legitimate business practices and fake profiles. Your experience in "high end technology sales" does not phase me, nor does it really have any bearing on the conversation whatsoever. But fake profiles don't "ask you to continue your subscription" they are profiles that coincideentally show interest in you when subscription time is about to run out. They may or may not show interest over prolonged periods of time but there have been documented cases of people who notice withheld real profiles that are only released when a user attempts to cancel their subscription. Or fake profiles that entice a user to continue using the website under the guise of showing emotional interest in them. On that note: legitimate business practices may be hurt by shady techniques but that doesn't stop high profile businesses from trying. I'm not pissing into the wind here and typing this out to exercise my fingers. And lastly, who are you to judge who is a loser, creepy, or fat-bald-old? There might be women out there who claim to like the short,stubby, hair-challenged type. Your specific experience that you claim is "above average" does not negate any other males experiences simply because you claim it isn't so.
Arasae Posted June 25, 2010 Posted June 25, 2010 I'm a big fan of okcupid myself! I've gone on several dates from this website, had a five month relationship from it, and I've found the quality of the men on it, overall, better. Their matching feature is MUCH more in-depth and there's quite a bit of intelligence floating around from the staff and the members, so.. go for it. Much better than e-harmony or PoF, I think.
Green Posted June 25, 2010 Posted June 25, 2010 Anyone else use this site? I was using match.com for a year and it made me HATE dating. This site seems like a lot more fun with all the questions, and I'm noticing a WAY better response rate already than I ever had on match. The only bad thing I notice so far is that there is a major abundance of extremely fat girls on this site. I mean wow, there's a TON of them. It's all good, I probably won't go on any dates but maybe I can make some new friends or something. Best thing about it, it's FREE!! My sincere advice is MEET WOMEN IN REAL LIFE. Just have flirty conversation with the NEXT pretty girl you see and ASK HER OUT. Internet Dating is BAD for men. most online dating sites the ratio is skewwed in favor of women. Women who use the sites are usually much happier with the results then men. Women have the power of choice in online situations, and therefore are able to not only be pickier, but also never have too few options. Men on the other hand, are constantly unhappy with the results because there are very few "initial" contacts by women, and like the poster above said: a lot of the women in these sites are unhealthily overweight. ONLINE DATING IS SKEWED FOR WOMEN. That is a FACT the way I see it. Real world all the way especialy if you are not tall or well off. HECK EVEN IF YOU ARE TALL OR WELL OFF the real world is especialy good for you. Your chances are much better and it's alot funner to get numbers in the real world with girls you actually would date. Unless you have the looks of a model and personality to match, you really don't have much of a chance of scoring with the 1/1000 hot girls on cupid/etc. The fact that those girls receive 30 messages a day and the anonymity of it all makes your chances near nil. It's flashier than match.com, but your response rates are going to be the same. The only site I feel I've been getting dates from is plenty of fish I find it so interesting to flirt with a REAL girl in the REAL world. Meeting women on line is WORK. The only reason it exists is because it allows women to avoid FEAR OF REJECTIOn and allows men to do the SAME.
alexlakeman Posted June 25, 2010 Posted June 25, 2010 If OKCupid is free, how does it get its revenue then? I am on Match and love it... obviously b/c I get results... I am sure if I didnt get results I would "hate it" as those that hate it too... . I've been on online dating (aol back in the day)... for years on and off, between relationships, etc... and have no complaints really.. It''s just like meeting a girl at the bar, she could be psycho there too, lol.. It's not like a get a response on every email I send, far from it.. but isn't that the way it is in real life? You talk to 10 girls, get a couple of numbers only, and out of that, you end up with maybe 1 good candidate... I respond to something specific on their profile and ask questions, so they have something to write back, etc... I don't send out mass emails or cookie cutter emails nor just winks... Well, winks I have used , but only when she's not 100% what I am looking for, etc.. so if she writes or winks back, fine.. if not, oh well.. The last relationship I had was about 8 months long and it was fantastic.. marriage material, etc... met her on match... A few years ago, my 3 yr relationship gf , I had met her on aol... I did meet a PSYCHO!!!! LOL, I almost forgot, lol... to make a long story short... she was great in bed, dressed like a slut, loved to party... and wiped me out financially ... lesson learned.. but I could've just met her on the street as well, so i don't blame it on online dating... Also, I always ask if its a current picture on their profile.. In addition, when we go meet somewhere, I sometimes say I am wearing a different color shirt, stand back, and make sure I see them b4 they see me, in case the real person is not quite the profile pics, lol... Put a little more effort in match and it will work.. maybe you're putting your standards wayyyyyyyyyyyyyy up high
kiss_andmakeup Posted June 26, 2010 Posted June 26, 2010 I met my boyfriend on OKCupid and we have been together for over two years. Of the relationships I've had, the one I have with him is overwhelmingly the most compatible, harmonious, and happy. However, I'll also say that this: Your chances are much better and it's alot funner to get numbers in the real world with girls you actually would date. Unless you have the looks of a model and personality to match, you really don't have much of a chance of scoring with the 1/1000 hot girls on cupid/etc. The fact that those girls receive 30 messages a day and the anonymity of it all makes your chances near nil. It's flashier than match.com, but your response rates are going to be the same. The only site I feel I've been getting dates from is plenty of fish ...is somewhat true. And I tell you this as being a decently good looking girl (I am not being arrogant and saying I'm one out of one-thousand as this poster suggested) who was signed up there. I got literally flooded with messages from guys. So while it was awesome and great fun for me (I also loved the little quizzes, questions and activities), that could be partially attributed to the fact that I had such a wide selection of guys. Since it's free, though, there's certainly no harm in giving it a whirl!
fishtaco Posted June 26, 2010 Posted June 26, 2010 I'm on it. It's more of a social site than a dating site. It's severely in favor of women. If you're a guy my advice is either don't bother, or spend 5 minutes to put up something, then ignore it. Shoot off a few messages when you're taking a dump. Put in minimal effort because the return percentage is also minimal. I don't know about pay sites, never been on them, but free sites there are a lot of women on there that are not serious. The trick is you have to hit on the newbies. Once she's been on the site for a few weeks, she'll stop responding unless you're Brad Pitt. Plenty Of Fish is superior in that way because there's a constant influx of new sign-ups. But either way, mass emailing women but at the same time somehow keeping my short messages relevant to them is tedious and boring. I rather go out and have a drink.
Ruby Slippers Posted June 26, 2010 Posted June 26, 2010 With all this talk about how it's a gold mine for girls, maybe I should finally cave and try it.
fishtaco Posted June 26, 2010 Posted June 26, 2010 With all this talk about how it's a gold mine for girls, maybe I should finally cave and try it. It's not exactly a goldmine for girls. More like just a mine that you have to dig and dig and dig. For men, you put in the effort, and get back sounds of crickets. For women, put a picture with some cleavage and you'll be flooded with requests for dates. Which is one step up from what the guys are getting, but you now have the potentially unpleasant task of sorting through all the crap. This is the internet, things happen in mass quantities. So I would say it's more fun for women, because at least you get some feedback, but don't count on the feedback being what you're looking for. Hence also the reason some women use it for ego boost purposes.
AngryTroll Posted June 26, 2010 Posted June 26, 2010 I'd pick OKC over PoF any day, but it does take some weeding out, on both sides. I'm a female and yes, I've been sent some emails but it's usually from men I would never have an interest in/perverted men.
MyNameIsJonas Posted June 26, 2010 Posted June 26, 2010 I'm on both PoF and OKC (and match for a bit) and put all three at about the same level. I had more dates with match, but it cost money and more or less had the feel of Carmax.com, except with women. I also put more effort into match simply because I was paying, and consequentially, I had more dates. I get off and on first messages from women on both OKC and PoF and very rarely send the first message. Of course, I took the road of not taking either site seriously at all and just posted a bunch of sarcastic, yet funny stuff on it. That got me a lot more attention than just putting up "interests" and "feelings" and random crap about the dog I don't actually own because, to be honest, every guy does that. I strive to not be every guy. I've been on a few dates with OKC and none with PoF (most messages on PoF never get to that point for one reason or another). They haven't really gone anywhere but that because of different reasons that don't involve any of the websites. The bottom line with any of these sites is to a) not take them seriously, and b) not use them as a primary means of meeting women. You should still try to talk to women in the real world because even if messages go swimmingly during internet chat, you still need those "social skills" when you are talking to her in real life at a bar/starbucks/restaurant/library/random walk in the pale moonlight. Staring awkwardly doesn't really work; believe me, i've tried.
Ruby Slippers Posted June 26, 2010 Posted June 26, 2010 So I would say it's more fun for women, because at least you get some feedback, but don't count on the feedback being what you're looking for. Hence also the reason some women use it for ego boost purposes. I could use an ego boost right about now. A while after my last breakup, during my self-imposed single year, I posted a simple ad on Craigslist looking for a phone sex partner and nothing more. I only left that ad up for 10 minutes, and I got more than 100 responses. I took my time over the next 6 months contacting ones I was interested in, and had phone sex with the ones I liked. Very educational. Of course, they all wanted to meet, but I didn't meet any of them.
iammolly Posted June 26, 2010 Posted June 26, 2010 I met the guy I am dating now on OKC. I am also on Match and Eharmony... OKC is far better in my opinion... And OKC gets revenue by selling upgraded "no ad" subscriptions, and I am pretty sure they use tracking cookies to see where you browse because the ads are suprisingly targeted.
Shakz Posted June 26, 2010 Posted June 26, 2010 Well, I finally went over to OKcupid to see what all the fuss was about and did a quick search of women in my area. Not too shabby. I think I might give it a whirl.
Serenitynow Posted June 26, 2010 Posted June 26, 2010 I did a search on OKcupid for my area, and it only has about 30 women that come up in a 25 mile radius. POF has at least 300 or more for the same search radius. My area is bad though for online dating. I know there are good looking women here, but very very few of them are on date sites. I think this area is way to conservative and stuck in the past. And I'm sure many of the good looking women think they are too good for dating sites. Where as in metro areas, its the "norm" because when I do a search for those areas, the choice gets much much more plentiful.
Shakz Posted June 26, 2010 Posted June 26, 2010 I did a search on OKcupid for my area, and it only has about 30 women that come up in a 25 mile radius. POF has at least 300 or more for the same search radius. My area is bad though for online dating. I know there are good looking women here, but very very few of them are on date sites. I think this area is way to conservative and stuck in the past. And I'm sure many of the good looking women think they are too good for dating sites. Where as in metro areas, its the "norm" because when I do a search for those areas, the choice gets much much more plentiful. Okay, did a quick search at PoF and got 373 matches with images within a 35 mile radius. And I live in a semi-rural area. I noticed that some of the women were on both sites, especially the ones in my immediate area (some of whom I recognized), but overall it seems like the better site. More extensive search parameters, better layout, more options. I think I might give PoF a try too. Thanks, SN.
tomcruise Posted June 26, 2010 Posted June 26, 2010 I prefer pof, and recently I tried averdate, it's new, not bad. The girls there quite decent and got a few reply.
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