Treasa Posted June 24, 2010 Posted June 24, 2010 After a six-year relationship and him breaking up with me four times (because he can't handle conflict of any kind), he finally told me on Monday night that he "misses having a girlfriend" but isn't certain I'm the one he wants. There isn't anyone else. I'm positive of it. It's almost laughable given how many issues he has that I put up with. I never responded to that email. My pride wouldn't let me. Especially since I had spent the month since the breakup trying to be friendly, helping him via email with things he was working on, being sympathetic to his problem, etc. Today he sends me a link he wanted to share with me about an actor we both like. WTF. You tell me you miss having a girlfriend but aren't sure I'm the one, and then have the nerve to email me with ANYTHING? Gah! It made my heart pound for a while, but I got back in control. Still not sure if I'm even going to reply. If I do, it will be neutral and short at best.
littlelisa30 Posted June 24, 2010 Posted June 24, 2010 Don't respond. If he ignored your attempts to be friendly, ignore his. It will either bug him or drive him crazy that you are no longer interested (even if you are)
Shakz Posted June 24, 2010 Posted June 24, 2010 Sounds like you still have strong feelings for him or you wouldn't have gotten so upset. Six years is a long time to be with someone and you have a history of taking him back. Maybe your mad at yourself a little, because that old feeling of "maybe I should relent" is tickling the back of your mind? I doubt this man will ever be willing to commit and his conflict avoidance issues are clearly not compatible with your personality. As daunting as it may seem, you might have to go the no-friends route just so you don't slip back into your old pattern.
ADF Posted June 24, 2010 Posted June 24, 2010 A relationship that drags on for 6 years with 4 break ups--4!--is a mess. I think your relationship with this man has run its course. Don't answer.
Author Treasa Posted June 24, 2010 Author Posted June 24, 2010 Oh, he absolutely wants to be friends. He was always appreciative and friendly when I communicated with him, even after he broke things off. He called me his love and his best friend, but just didn't think it could work out after everything that had happened. I have to be strong now for myself.
quankanne Posted June 24, 2010 Posted June 24, 2010 block his access to you, thus going completely no-contact with the guy. I would ...
O'Malley Posted June 25, 2010 Posted June 25, 2010 A relationship that drags on for 6 years with 4 break ups--4!--is a mess. Sad but true. There's no real reason to contact him or even read his contacts. His attempt to retain your friendship is just grasping at embers and worse, has the potential to keep you in the cycle you've previously been in. Be selfish for a change.
GrayClouds Posted June 25, 2010 Posted June 25, 2010 (edited) he finally told me on Monday night that he "misses having a girlfriend" but isn't certain I'm the one he wants. There isn't anyone else. I'm positive of it. It's almost laughable given how many issues he has that I put up with. No where near laughable, simple cruel and really sad. Be kind to yourself, go complete NC. He is f#cking with your head, and wants to keep you on the hook so he can f#ck with the part about 3 feet down when he is lonely. If he has to think about loving you or not then it is not. It may have been pretty entertaining but it it time to get off this stage because this is not love it is drama. You deserve better. Read these if you have not, re-read them if you have, it time to put you first: The No Contact Guide So you want a second chance? Edited June 25, 2010 by GrayClouds
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