I want my EX-GF back! need advice in what to do! shes being counfusing right now?

[bfontz]

ok i really really need all your support here as it really is depressing. my ex girlfriend broke up with me on the 27th of dec. she had many reasons but i really dont know which one. so ne ways.. i really want her back i love her a lot and weve been through some ups and downs but i was really sad that i didnt get to be her bf for new years our 7 months her 18th bday now again 3 important days are coming and thats suppose to be our 8 months valentines day and my 19th bday. weve been going out for 6 months or went out. she says she still cares for me so much and loves me.

 

what i really dont get is that all the stuff she did we went to disneyland and werent going out at the time it was the 2nd of jan and she invited this guy and it was one painful they were like touching each other and like cuddling and holding hands and it hasnt even been a week yet. thats one thing that made me mad then she ran away and when her sis and i found her the first thing she does is ask her sis what am i doing here when i care for her and love her. so then people say its like she rebounding or whatever it is? its like in disneyland she cuddled with him held hands then to me she did it too. so now days pass by now its our 7 months or suppose to be.. i told her sis during lunch that you know what its suppose to be our 7 months today and she said to me yea i know my sister said it like a few times, and i though to myself are you serious and then she says yes she mentioned it last night to me then today to me and then to her friend and i was like hmmm... so thats one thing thats weird.

 

THEN!, then next day both my ex and i were in the back of my car talking during her lunch break from school. and i find her wearing on her wrist the heart braclet i gave her with our picture that was engraved from those booths from sea world attaced to it. and ALSO! on our 7 months we were talking online and she said she had to go to bed and then she said bye and i said it too and then she says you know i love you too with a smiley face..and she knows ive been so so depressed from her breaking up with me..and i said i love you too and i then said for the heck of it happy 7 months and she gave me a smiley face again.. but yea its all so confusing i really love her i really dont know what to do and i want to know please people i know but i really want to try not to read forget her move on all that crap..just a way to get her back what should i do when i want to talk to her...i said it all in my info that i love her and miss her

 

so i dont know... it so sad right now but for some information she and i are 18 im 11 months older than her shes a sen in high school im fresh in college we went out for six months... and actually she broke up with me one time in last of oct cause she couldnt handle a bf when she lied and told me later that her friends had pressured her into breaking up with me cuase i was annoying so she got back with me a day later to make her own decision and it was like that wasnt a 2nd chance cuase when she broke up with me recently which is the 2nd time thats not a 2nd chance is it??? i mean she told me i already did give you chance when i tried to get her back... and if shes not going backj to me then why i dont get it she has all my clothes still, my house key, and her xanga info still says what she likes and thats spending time with me...its all so weird...she said we didnt understand each other when she broke up with me i told my friends and they said that when you guys were together it sure looked like you understood each other. i mean im going on a mission for 2 years and ive asked her many times if its that and she says many times its not that...

 

tell everyone that and theyre like mayeb it is and same here deep down inside of me it does feel like thats it..so talk to my friends and they say maybe shes jsut trying to unattach herself from you so it wont be as devastating when you leave for 2 years.. and then you guys go out again later after your two years.. and she also said that its not going to miss having a bf its going to be missing you... and also in other info she even mentioned marriage a lot like everytime we would talk about us she would acciendently like say yea our kids are going to be smart and tall and then when she mentions something uh yea your kids you know..like to fix it thinking i didnt see her..then she asks me other stuff like can you see me as your wife and all this other stuff..i mean weve been through evertying togeher and done everything together an di love her so much and i can see myself being with her for the rest of my life...and i dont care what peoplke say get over her or it takes a while but im serious i mean everything froze when i started going out with her i love her so much..and also she mentioned when she broke up with me that i do try to hard. i mean i bring her lunch everday and see her everyday..

 

so when we broke up and after talking to everyone and stuff only one thing hasnt happend that i am currently doing right now that everyone said and yes thats to give her space dont talk to her or see her..at school i mean thats how much i love her people were not going out and i still go and see her everyday at school during her lunch..and so i havent been seeing her or talking to her. and then this is wehre it all started..

 

i told her everything that i could on my info from AIM and its 5 screen names long so she must have read that and im me saying hey you there? hello you know and so i didnt respond but i told her all these things how i want her back and that ive been giving her space and that i miss her and love her...but please tell me what to do to get her back...but yea to give her space like my friends said to shell be like hey how come hes not tlaking to me anymore or not even seeing me then she call me and say we should hang out and maybe that will have a spark again but then when i think about it thats why i havent done it till now what happens if shes like oh ok hes forgotten about me now i can date again and move on but no i love her so please people help me here what should i do ask any questions you want and ill do my best to asnwer them thank you so much i look forward for all your replies and support....

 

i..i just dont know shes really being confusing could something happen for supposably our 8 months like last month and something for valentines day? should i not talk to her at all and wait till then? tell me exactly what to to tell her...all she says is hello and i dont reply and thast whats weird she always goes hiyee or hey but now its been hello..? could she want to talk to to us when should i reply when she says sorry about disneyland? or what? please tell me what to start out with the next time she IMs me with just hi or hello i really cant wait anylonger?

 

maybe i should ask hey do you still love me? then if its yes then i say then where are we in this relationship? if not then what made you break up with me or lose interest? please give me some stuff to say to her please! id appreciate it..thank you

[Emily55555]

i think sum1 wud reply if that didnt take forever to read. sry

[bfontz]

omg...please people! i already broke it up into paragraphs...you see no one knows what im going through...thats why its all detailed so you guys can help me out... just please read it and tell me what my ex girlfriend is wanting...i need to know her own side, her perspective shes confused right now..does she still have feelings for me? after all that stuff i said before...what stuff? please just read the thread... please im asking for all your help..thank you

[glasshammer]

Move on. You don't want to hear that because you love her so much that it hurts, But you

need to lay off her. She sounds like she has some issues and she's being childish, but then again she is only 18.

She's doesn't seem grown up enough to understand a Meaningful Relationship.

 

If she truly loved you, She wouldn't have broken up with you because of her friends. She should

have told her friends to stay out of it. Big deal, she got back together with you because she was

making her own decision, She shouldn't have done it in the first place.

 

She's playing games with you whether she realizes it or not. Give her space and Move on. Don't sit

by yourself feeling sad and lonely, you're only 19, there are a lot of other girls out there. College

girls.

[glasshammer]

That's the problem.,..I don't think she knows what she wants. And if she was being

all cuddly with some new guy and it hadn't even been a week??? Have respect for yourself

dude, She doesn;t care about you as much as she thinks. She may like the attention she's

getting from you, But you should be able to tell from her actions right now, that She is

being childish and selfish and mean. You don't need that. If my girl did that to me,

I'd turn my back on her and not look back

[bfontz]

do you think shes afraid of commitment. cause you see two things i hope that the reasons are why she broke up with me is...school she wants to get high school out of the way real bad and 2nd is commitment...she even told me that i dont think im ready and stufff liek that and that she wants to be a lone and single for a while...

 

how long does it take to lose that fear of commitment...so does thjat mean shell be dating other people and then or what? i don tknow..help me out on that one..

[glasshammer]

Saying that she wants to be alone and single for a while could mean anything, But for sure it means that she

wants to keep her options OPEN. You could give her all the space you want, but it just seems that she's

ready to move on to the next guy.

 

You can't put a time limit on losing fears such as fears of commitment. Everyone is different. She's young,

It's understandable that she doesn;t want to stay with just ONE guy. She's pretty much sending you messages and

giving you signs in her own subtle way.

[bfontz]

so what do you mean keep her options open?? and could it be possible that yea she wants to get rid of school and or date other guys first and see if im the one and then come back to me?

[glasshammer]

Difficult to say........Some girls don't want to just come out and tell you the truth because they are afraid

to hurt your feelings or look like the mean one. Plus they don't want to have to deal with the guilt.

 

So even if you asked her about it, She'd just say something like I need space or , I need time for me etc.

She's not going to come out and just say "I don't like you anymore".

 

She's toying with the whole Love thing too, i think. It's fun to say I Love You. She doesn't realize she's

toying with your heart, or maybe she does. YOU NEED TO ASK HER STRAIGHT OUT.....What do you want?

If she wants to be alone, Let her go. BUT, you need to do your own thing too.

 

The relationship is still so young, there's people on here that have been together 4, 5 6 years and then

there partners leave them, Be lucky you found out this stuff early.

[bfontz]

well she has told me that she dont like me anymore and all that stuff you said about not saying her answer striaght out to me yea like she siad i just think i dont have that feeling anymore towards you i love you but just not that way anymore like friends only...and with all the weird stuff shes done to me or with me that i noticed when werent going out ..psht omg man...woulnt you like to know?...so yea i dont know if she does have feelings for me my friends say shes rebounding? if thast whats you call it and one said she has feelings for you still i think with all the weird stuff she did with or to you when you guys werent going out...but still she has you tied around her finger..and all that crap i dont know... HELP please thanks..

[glasshammer]

If you like confusion and the feeling of a broken heart and being used, By all means do all you can to try and

get her back. But I think you need to gorget about her. Once you do, she'll come around like a little puppy wondering why

she's not getting any attention from you. please please please please please please think that this is theonly girl you'll ever feel this way for. When i was your age, I was so in love with this one girl who cheated on me and even though she cheated on me, i was willing to forgive her, even though I was being played. she didn't love me. She just said she did. She didn't want to be tied down when she was 18 either.

 

anyway, don't be a dummy and not listen to this advice. Read This Post, FORGET ABOUT HER!

[amerikajin]

She's not interested in you anymore. It's as simple as that.

 

You got 49'ed.

[bfontz]

whats 49' ed?

[SoleMate]

I don't know what 49 is, but I do know what being dumped looks like. And I am sorry to say it has happened to you. Please note: HAS HAPPENED. You had some time together, which was profoundly meaningful for you and perhaps less so for her. Who knows. She is only 18, really just a girl still. She's being flighty and childish, yes...at her age is the right time for it. If she were 35, this kinda behavior would worry me.

 

And you...we'll forgive you for what you're doing. Clinging on to the corpse of a relationship.

 

The only thing you should say to her is, "When can I pick up my clothes and house key?" Then please go read some books about relationships, work out, clean out your fridge, split some logs, help your mom with spring cleaning, feed the poor, and recognize that you have taken one more little step on the road to manhood.

 

Last word...we feel your pain, and we want to help shorten it for ya!!

[bfontz]

thanks for all your guys help i have one more thing to say all my friends and co workers have been saying to act all cool and stuff and hang aournd other girls dont talk to her or see her and then shell be like all worried and suspicious and maybe jealous cuase i heard them say somehting about a girl can't get what she wants?

[dario]

If you wanna play that game and torture yourself - go ahead and play that game. In doing so, you will lose yourself in doing so...and you will forget about the most important person at the moment - you.

[amerikajin]

When a woman's interest level drops to 49 on the scale of 100, that means you're out. She's completely lost romantic interest in you.

[dario]

Did you read Kit's update about a meeting he had with his ex? Pretty damn inspirational. Better yourself in all ways and if she sees this or acknowledges this...then who knows? Climb this one - see it through. I'm learning that now...and, yeah, it's probably too late...but I'm finding some strength in myself to 'move on'. If anything....leave the girl be so that you can get to that meeting in the distant/near/whatever future. If you have to...see it as an internal strength builder for yourself with that meeting in mind so that you can approach it with clarity. I'm talking stupid I guess....but I think I'm making sense. Hit the gas pedal - get yourself into gear and true power (of yourself) will follow. It's damn hard - I know. But I know so many mates who've been crippled (their dreams etc) by a broken heart....and for me, that was just about to happen. My passions were sliding and I realised, 'Wait a minute...yeah, she was a good reason to 'live' but not the only reason...I can't neglect what I was put on this earth to do. I must achieve what I want to achieve. For me.' A broken heart kills...it slices and dices and that's when fifth gear comes into play. For me, I go into hyper drive and don't settle down...I come across as a loony tune when it's the place I've put myself in...I haven't/never give myself a chance to RELAX. And now that future meeting I might have with my ex is not ever to get back with her...but to openly apologise for coming across as a bit of a sap because I was wounded and never let the wound heal. Instead, I sidetracked it with craziness and drink and stupidity. Not good. Take care of yourself.