ecto-1 Posted June 23, 2010 Posted June 23, 2010 I have a friend of mine, we had some good friends we hung out with as a group, but for some reason, this one woman took a liking to him, and became real GOOD friends, yes...he was put in the friendzone, but he's one of those guys that doesn't mind that, because ...it just doesn't bother him. She really liked him a lot, as a friend, even threw a couple of B-day parties for him as well. One day she gets a boyfriend, things get serious..she dates him for about several months, they hit it off, and now they're married. I told my friend that I just mentioned here in this post "Hey, did you know so and so got married?" He said that she has shut him out of her life the past 6+ months with no explanation and it didn't go over well with him. I have heard of this happening a few times actually....do you think the boyfriend might of said something, and didn't want her to have anything to do with him? Do some people shut their friends out of their lives COMPLETELY once they get serious with a mate or even married? Guess he's ticked he didn't get a wedding invite. lol But that was kind of lousy of her, I told him, she seemed kind of a phoney anyhow. Reason I SAY this is because she emailed me saying she wanted to celebrate my up and coming birthday....I said, "Cool, where do you want to have it?" She never responded to that question nor followed through with that event. I think this all happened after she got a boyfriend. I think he's one of those dudes that likes to shut his spouse/mate off of previous friendships...and of course the mate allows it.
alphamale Posted June 24, 2010 Posted June 24, 2010 I think he's one of those dudes that likes to shut his spouse/mate off of previous friendships...and of course the mate allows it. yea thats what it sounds like but it reinforces my opinion that men and women shouldn't be just "friends" many people fall of the face of the earth once they get married and have kids
Author ecto-1 Posted June 24, 2010 Author Posted June 24, 2010 yea thats what it sounds like but it reinforces my opinion that men and women shouldn't be just "friends" many people fall of the face of the earth once they get married and have kids She knew him when both she and he were single, and we hung out in groups of mostly single people....I guess you get into a routine of flirting sometimes, or taking fun photographs of her sitting in his lap or his arm around two different women, and so on...it'sall in good fun. I think she gave a lap dance (clothed of course) to her friend as a B-day present when she had a couple of drinks in her. LOL Then one of those women gets a man, and all the "fun" has to stop, because, well face it the new boyfriend will put a stop to it....even if it means ceasing contact altogether, it's a shame because they knew each other pretty well for 3 years. Funny thing is, her boyfriend had deleted his FB account, while she kept hers up. THis mean he doesn't want to network with HER friends one bit.
alphamale Posted June 24, 2010 Posted June 24, 2010 it's a shame because they knew each other pretty well for 3 years. ALL relationships have a built-in time limit...
sagetalk Posted June 24, 2010 Posted June 24, 2010 1. He said that she has shut him out of her life the past 6+ months with no explanation and it didn't go over well with him. 2. I have heard of this happening a few times actually....do you think the boyfriend might of said something, and didn't want her to have anything to do with him? 3. Do some people shut their friends out of their lives COMPLETELY once they get serious with a mate or even married? 4. I think he's one of those dudes that likes to shut his spouse/mate off of previous friendships...and of course the mate allows it. 1. Typical 2. No she was using him as a non-sexual, feel good toy until she found a guy that she was sexually attracted to. 3. Yes, family too, but I don't think they were real friends. She just liked the attention. That's not a real friend, that's an attention whore. 4. Yep, the brains are scrambled. I'm afraid she's toast. Happens all the time. Most of the time the people who want you to dump all your friends and family are themselves untrustworthy.
alphamale Posted June 24, 2010 Posted June 24, 2010 another point, generally married people associate with other married people and most singles hang out with other singles. thats the way it is
Author ecto-1 Posted June 24, 2010 Author Posted June 24, 2010 I remember at work, a co-worker who was female, kind of new to the area, moved here with her b/f......said to him she wanting to make new friends...and he says, "You don't need new friends , you got me!" lol Yikes!
Stung Posted June 24, 2010 Posted June 24, 2010 It's callous and thoughtless for her to have cut him off as a friend without alerting him to her reason, but that doesn't mean she didn't have a reason. Her bf not wanting her to maintain contact is one probable reason. Nobody on this message board can tell you for sure. It's also possible that your friend is not as blameless in this as you think he is, perhaps he played some part in making her or her bf uncomfortable with their friendship somehow. Anyway, it happens sometimes. Friendships grow and change and sometimes fall by the wayside, whether between same or opposite sex. It's sad but it's best to move on.
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