Taramere Posted June 24, 2010 Posted June 24, 2010 (edited) I pared my facebook activities right down. Disabled the wall, and now I only use it for private messages. Occasionally I'll feel obliged to write a congratulatory or happy birthday message on someone else's wall, but generally I just use it for the messaging. A friend I had a bit of conflict with some months back started posting a crazy amount of updates along with excerpts of this "I'm a therapist, fear me" blog she writes (can't remember the actual name of the blog). I was logging on to FB to be greeted on my home page with her little picture next to comments inviting me to learn about dysfunctional friendships from her blog, and musing out loud about "when you wonder why you're friends with a particular person..." I found that if you click the cross beside a person's updates a couple of times, Facebook will ask you if you want to hide that person. You click in the affirmative, and FB liberates you from their daily musings without going to the extreme of actually deleting them from your list. It's a handy function. Edited June 24, 2010 by Taramere
KismetGirl Posted June 24, 2010 Posted June 24, 2010 I have over 500 fb friends. This thread makes me want to log in. LOL! I don't think most people got your sarcastic comment. Well funny dude. FB addiction aaaaaaaah! Yeah whatever. I've found a couple of really great friends via facebook that I've reconnected with in a great way, that I really would NOT have found otherwise. Seriously. One of them was from childhood and I could not for the life of me remember how her last name was spelled, but she remembered mine and found me even though I had searched for her before with no luck. Another friend from back in the day moved to Europe and changed her last name altogether so I had given up on ever finding her again, and lo and behold she found me too. I now speak to both of these girls on a near-daily basis and love them to death. Have I seen pictures of exes on FB that make me want to jump off a bridge? Sure thing. Especially when it's someone I'm not totally over and I see photos of them looking happy as ever with their girlfriends or wives. But whatever man, if you can't get over seeing photos, you have other deeper issues ingrained regarding this individual, and I am pretty sure that you think about them regardless of their facebook activity. If you didn't, then seeing them online wouldn't be such a shock right? Block them, and if you happen to see them in a photo that a mutual friend puts up...get over it. There are worse things in life. You're still alive after the break up, you'll still be alive in the future regardless of that exes' activities! You can doooooo it! Hell, I had an affair with a married man for like 5 years, and one of his siblings is friends with me on facebook. I see intimate family photos of MM, his wife, his kids, and all that jazz on a regular. It hurt in the beginning, like nobody's business, but I have to tell you....perhaps it is the "exposure" factor, but after a while it started to affect me less, and nowadays, I'll still have a bit of a sentimental feeling seeing his picture, but after seeing it a hundred times it doesn't make me want to go cry like it used to at all. You'll get over it, trust me, and probably more so if you see his face over and over. He'll just become part of the background and eventually it will be nary but a blip on the emotional radar when you see him. Not that I would recommend seeing him in person....but pictures online? Just click to the next one or close the bloody screen! Good luck!
Arbitrariness Posted June 24, 2010 Posted June 24, 2010 For the same reason people hate facebook I love it! I can look up cool people from high school that got fat and are unsuccessful at life, to give me that instant feel goodness. Losers promote their sad relationships on facebook.
Morals Posted June 24, 2010 Posted June 24, 2010 and I'm guessing roughly 450 of them are acquaintances whom you never speak to on there? I see people on there who have 600, 700 and even more. Its very unrealistic to think that someone would keep in contact with all those people on a regular basis. Agreed. People who have that many tend to just "collect" friends. There is no knowing of those people, just another "friend". I actualy probably have 600 and yes they all know me well. We all get togather a few times a week an just shoot the breeze. Let's assume you have 10 hours of free time a day. (6 hours of sleep+8 hours of work). That's 600 minutes. If you spent 1 minute contacting each friend, you would barely be able to contact all "600" of your friends in one day.
MyNameIsJane Posted June 24, 2010 Posted June 24, 2010 Agreed. People who have that many tend to just "collect" friends. There is no knowing of those people, just another "friend". I think it is so worthless - But I have been burned in the past by accepting friend request of people I didn't really know (but just had "mutual friends")... so I of course would preach that. Many people I know with 800+ friends are club promoters or trying to get themselves out there for some reason... I automatically deny club promoters though because they spam you to death
morganmedina Posted June 24, 2010 Posted June 24, 2010 You should definitely block them. I have 6 people blocked on my facebook and it makes my life easier. you DONT see any pictures of them. even if your friends have them as a friend you will NEVER see there name. If you block them then they basically dont exist and they will think you dont have a facebook either or if they are smart they will know that you blocked them. I say just BLOCK THEM!!
Engadget Posted June 24, 2010 Posted June 24, 2010 On topic but not, I was bantering back and forth with an attractive female friend who is the ex girlfriend of someone I know. We always do it and it means nothing. Out from left field comes Captain Meathead who starts insulting me in the middle of our conversation, and I have no idea who he is. People like that need to be exterminated. He must feel threatened or something and I'm guessing he's trying to get in her pants.
Bike_Ride Posted June 25, 2010 Posted June 25, 2010 I hope facebook dies NO.... facebook should not die and it is a useful tool if yo uuse it as such rather than use it to "catch" "spy" or "stalk" out people you know just to see if they are doing BETTER than you. Once you check on an old BF and discover he is a contractor making lots of money and see all his kids and happy marriage going on, yo usit there and say.."god darn it all" while you cry yourself to sleep because you all of a sudden get feelings of extreme envy. My advice is to cut it out, delete FaceBook and never return until you can be grown up enough to let the EX go and NOT care what he is doing. This "I stumbled upon him" doesn't fly with me. I see so many people get so depressed once they find out an old EX is doing great while you are not it makes my head spin...Is it worth it?...to risk getting yourself down because you find out he is happy and your little hopeful wish of "I hope he is NOT happy" falls? You have to let it go....let him go and move on, concentrate on what YOU can do and who cares if an EX is doing great...It means he moved on and it's what you have to do too. Just do what you can do and be happy with your own accomplishments, who cares what everyone thinks or is doing...it doesn't matter and your wasting your time pondering over it. Huggs though....I know how it feels in these situations..it sucks, but I'm done wasting my time thinking who is or whos what....screw it...its all about me now and how far I can get in life. I'd get rid of facebook if you feel you cannot handle these types of situations...it'll just keep ripping you apart.
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