BiAxident Posted June 22, 2010 Posted June 22, 2010 I'm officially on day three of being "zombified"; you know the feeling, when basically when dont sleep or eat very much at all. I was literally on here about 4 hours ago, and now I'm awake and in facebook chat with my obsession, and she doesn't have much to say I'm almost 31, I make $600 a month on a good month, and live in Michigan with little hope of finding fulltime work. My father is widowed and unemployed and alone and doesnt know how he is going to pay the bills, and I screwed up the 2nd chance that I NEVER thought I was going to get. The funny thing is, 8 weeks ago I was relatively optimistic about my situation, it certainly didn't keep me awake at night. Now? I dont see anyway that my life is going to get anything other than worse, and it is really starting to freak me out If I had accepted the second chance, at least then I would have a positive influence in my life. Meeting with her tonight to "hang out" and it will probably be agonizing. I wish I could just sleep 18 hours a day
heavensmesenger Posted June 22, 2010 Posted June 22, 2010 I'm so sorry to hear what your going through. I honestly don't know how to help you get through this but to say if you need to vent I'm here. It will certainly make you feel better. I think all there is to do now is move on. I know it's hard, I know you feel like the ex is the only person who will make things better but they won't and only you can. You have to. Nobody wants to stay with somebody out of necessity, they want to be with them because they want to. I don't know if this will help you but read the below post. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t235499 I wish I had better advice for you but I'm screwed with my own problems. I don't think meeting her is a good idea given your current frame of mind. You will see how happy she is and that will just hurt you even more.
StarrySkyBlue Posted June 22, 2010 Posted June 22, 2010 Hi, I don't know how to help either, but I feel your pain and I wish you all the best. Don't give up now. Life might seem terrible right now, but you will pull through and things will get better!
Author BiAxident Posted June 22, 2010 Author Posted June 22, 2010 I wish I had better advice for you but I'm screwed with my own problems. I don't think meeting her is a good idea given your current frame of mind. You will see how happy she is and that will just hurt you even more. Yeah, but in my situation she said she still considers me an "option". If I DONT hang out with her, I'm pretty much giving up on my chance. It may be painful, but at least I still have a chance, regardless of how narrow it may be (and I suspect that it is very narrow).
Author BiAxident Posted June 22, 2010 Author Posted June 22, 2010 Hi, I don't know how to help either, but I feel your pain and I wish you all the best. Don't give up now. Life might seem terrible right now, but you will pull through and things will get better! I'd like to think so... but I just cant see anyway that things can. Assuming that the ex and I dont get back together, and that I restart no-contact, then yeah eventuall the pain may subside, but living at home with an elderly, depressed parent is not going to help pull me out of a funk. Having no time for dating with school and work is just going to leave me lonely as all hell.
heavensmesenger Posted June 22, 2010 Posted June 22, 2010 My ex considered me an option. Look where it got me, one night of false hope. Yes she may well consider you an option but seriously? Do you think she's going to choose you given what your going through at this point in time? At the moment, she'll go for the first confident guy she comes across because women like confidence. Trust me I know, everytime I saw my ex I broke down, made her uncomfortable and she even said to me "seeing you like this makes it easier for me to be with somebody else, I can't take all this pressure You need to leave me alone" It goes on lol If your gonna go see her try and fake confidence, let her know your happy. If you get your second chance take things slow and treat seeing her today like a "third date". Pretend you know nothing about her and get to know her all over again
Author BiAxident Posted June 22, 2010 Author Posted June 22, 2010 My ex considered me an option. Look where it got me, one night of false hope. Yes she may well consider you an option but seriously? Do you think she's going to choose you given what your going through at this point in time? No, I dont think that she is going to choose me, as she seems MUCH more interested in this other guy for the time being. But still, if I do nothing then I'm just giving up on whatever little chance that I do have. It is all very confusing and very painful, and I hate myself for not taking the chance when I had it.
heavensmesenger Posted June 23, 2010 Posted June 23, 2010 (edited) I feel your pain man, but theres little you can do. It all depends what you want to put yourself through. If you be her friend do you want to hear her talking about how much better this guy is than you? How different he is? How she sees a future with him? You can't make somebody fall in love with you and you most certainly can't make them choose you. You just have to show her that your the better person. If your ok with being friends then do that but mentally prepare yourself for disappointment because it may come at anytime. I wish I was back with my ex but I have no chance. I wish you all the best of luck. Edited June 23, 2010 by heavensmesenger
Treasa Posted June 23, 2010 Posted June 23, 2010 People want what they can't have. Walk away. Then you'll get your answer.
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