What's the normal amount of time until the guy you're seeing asks for exclusivity...

[alphamale]

What do you mean?

its human nature to up the stakes when you think you're going to lose someone.

 

it sounds like you're really not into him that much so its time to move on

[Fay]

its human nature to up the stakes when you think you're going to lose someone.

 

it sounds like you're really not into him that much so its time to move on

 

Yes, like I said, I think it forced his hand even though that was not my intention at all. I really wanted to end it at the time.

 

But then we had a long conversation where he bared his heart and kind of negated the stuff that bothers me about him (even though, jaded old biatch that I am, I'm still wary), and I'm willing to give it a fair shot. I do like him, you know. He's brilliant, hilarious, sweet, and a super-hottie.

 

Am I wrong for this? Give me some constructive criticism.

[alphamale]

Am I wrong for this? Give me some constructive criticism.

just continue the relationship on a casual basis and see what happens. its only been a month

[Fay]

just continue the relationship on a casual basis and see what happens. its only been a month

 

Thanks. Will do.

[Diezel]

Funny thing. I actually wrote him an email yesterday where I explicitly dumped him and told him all the reasons why I was doing it. I didn't leave any loopholes for him to sneak back in through. He replies to the email telling me how into me he is, and how he hasn't felt this way since forever about anyone, and how he wants me to meet his friends, and how, in his opinion, we actually are exclusive.

 

Now awaiting future thread from Fay wondering why her boyfriend suddenly dumped her through text... and how DARE HE be such a coward like that...

 

Over/under on him dumping her through text or email?

[Ruby Slippers]

But the thing is I didn't ask for exclusivity at all. The way I phrased it was something to the effect of "You haven't introduced me to any of your friends, [etc, etc...] I have the niggling suspicion that you're hiding me from someone... [other stuff, blah blah blah...] I'm sorry, but this isn't working for me. I wish you the best of luck finding someone. Best wishes, Fay"... and then HE pulled out the exclusivity thing.

 

Riddle me that, Batman.

You held the threat of breaking up with him over his head as a way to get him to introduce you to his friends? No, wait -- you did break up with him for that reason, via E-MAIL, then took him back the second he said he would fix what you broke up with him for???

 

Exceedingly poor communication on your part. You've just set a terrible precedent with this guy.

 

And if a woman is interested in finding a man who really likes her and will stick with her, pushing for exclusivity (or certainly manipulating to get it) is a dead-end approach.

[Fay]

You held the threat of breaking up with him over his head as a way to get him to introduce you to his friends? No, wait -- you did break up with him for that reason, via E-MAIL, then took him back the second he said he would fix what you broke up with him for???

 

Exceedingly poor communication on your part. You've just set a terrible precedent with this guy.

 

And if a woman is interested in finding a man who really likes her and will stick with her, pushing for exclusivity (or certainly manipulating to get it) is a dead-end approach.

 

A) I didn't do that. I actually did break up with him, purely because I wanted to. No manipulation or ulterior motive. He talked me into staying. I have no reason to manipulate him into anything, because honestly, at this point in my life and career it's easier and more comfortable for me to be alone. Poor precedent for future communication? So what. If the thing goes to shi'ite then fate would be doing me a favor. Subconscious sabotage? Maybe.

 

B) Literacy is not optional, Ruby Slippers. Go back and read the thread before you make a not-so-smart response based on a gut reaction. Did someone do to you what you're accusing me of doing? Poor baby. Get over it.