shadowplay Posted June 21, 2010 Posted June 21, 2010 If you've seen the movie, would you do it? In the movie, the main characters undergo a procedure that has the memory of a painful relationship completely erased from their minds, including any memory of their significant other. The SO becomes a stranger. I've been thinking about this a lot since we broke up 2.5 months ago, and decided that I without hesitation would but only if I could retain the positive changes and motivations in my life that I've made since the breakup. I don't care about losing the positive memories, in fact I want to. Too bad such a procedure (risk-free) doesn't exist!
Shakz Posted June 21, 2010 Posted June 21, 2010 If you've seen the movie, would you do it? In the movie, the main characters undergo a procedure that has the memory of a painful relationship completely erased from their minds, including any memory of their significant other. The SO becomes a stranger. I've been thinking about this a lot since we broke up 2.5 months ago, and decided that I without hesitation would but only if I could retain the positive changes and motivations in my life that I've made since the breakup. I don't care about losing the positive memories, in fact I want to. Too bad such a procedure (risk-free) doesn't exist! Why would you want to lose the positive memories?
Author shadowplay Posted June 21, 2010 Author Posted June 21, 2010 Why would you want to lose the positive memories? The same reason it's unpleasant to wake up from a happy dream.
USMCHokie Posted June 21, 2010 Posted June 21, 2010 I would never do it. I will forever cherish those memories I had with her. But at the same time, I will have wanted to remember all the negative as well, because it's through that adversity and those negative experiences that I learned what I know now... You would have never made those positive changes you're speaking of without having gone through the crap to motivate those changes...
littlelisa30 Posted June 21, 2010 Posted June 21, 2010 It has been two weeks today since my husband left me and moved out without warning. From my point of view we weren't even having any problems. He just wanted something new apparently. I would have the procedure done without hesitation. Just take away all memories of him so if I see him somewhere (especially with someone new) I won't even know who he is. As much as I cherish the good memories of our time together (and I have a lot as I thought we were happy) I would get rid of those too becasue they are the most painful right now. I can't believe how much my life is changing-feels like a tornado came through and destroyed my home and everything I once knew and it's just gone and there is nothing I can do and I have to try and rebuild but I don't have the energy or the drive to do anything but sit amongst the ruins dumbfounded, just looking around like what the hell happened! meanwhile, he's picked up, moved on and is probably telling himself he's happy. Yes, I would have the procedure done in a minute. I could finally be happy again without these memories. They aren't even actually memories yet (of old times) they are from 3 weeks ago when I was happy and loved- when I thought WE were happy.
scottishlassy Posted June 21, 2010 Posted June 21, 2010 At this point and time, I would do it. I'm tired of looking at cars going by wondering if that's him. I'm tired of wondering if he's with her or her or her. I'm tired of wondering what he is doing with her, her and her. I'm tired of thinking about him. I'm tired of every time I try to move on, he won't let me. Yes, I would do it in a heartbeat.
Green Posted June 21, 2010 Posted June 21, 2010 The same reason it's unpleasant to wake up from a happy dream. I like waking up with the memory of a good dream. In the movie they were doomed to forever meet each other and break up and have their memories erased.
Star Gazer Posted June 21, 2010 Posted June 21, 2010 No, I wouldn't. (1) I don't want to forget or erase the happy memories I have of our time together; (2) I don't think any of us can truly appreciate the finer things in life (including finer relationships ) without having experienced trials and tributions, including heartbreak. I think people who haven't experienced bad things in life can't really have empathy or appreciation and gratitude, which are necessary qualities to have to have a healthy relationship.
Circular Posted June 21, 2010 Posted June 21, 2010 Wasn't the point of the movie that 'history repeats itself' as both characters were patients? Basically all the states that existed before you met her would be true again, except for her she would know it is you. And, oddly if you're in the same social circles you'd be destined to want her all over again....hahaha be careful what you ask for.
threebyfate Posted June 21, 2010 Posted June 21, 2010 If you've seen the movie, would you do it? In the movie, the main characters undergo a procedure that has the memory of a painful relationship completely erased from their minds, including any memory of their significant other. The SO becomes a stranger. I've been thinking about this a lot since we broke up 2.5 months ago, and decided that I without hesitation would but only if I could retain the positive changes and motivations in my life that I've made since the breakup. I don't care about losing the positive memories, in fact I want to. Too bad such a procedure (risk-free) doesn't exist! Ha! Do yourself a favour and make a mental list of everything you learned from this past relationship, including about yourself and what makes you tick. Would you really want to scrub all that insight away?
Author shadowplay Posted June 21, 2010 Author Posted June 21, 2010 Ha! Do yourself a favour and make a mental list of everything you learned from this past relationship, including about yourself and what makes you tick. Would you really want to scrub all that insight away? Yeah, that's the rub. I want all of the positive insights minus the crappy/happy memories, an impossibility. You have to take the bad with the good I guess.
Author shadowplay Posted June 21, 2010 Author Posted June 21, 2010 Wasn't the point of the movie that 'history repeats itself' as both characters were patients? Basically all the states that existed before you met her would be true again, except for her she would know it is you. And, oddly if you're in the same social circles you'd be destined to want her all over again....hahaha be careful what you ask for. I can't remember too clearly, but don't they both learn they were patients at the end of the movie after they've met each other again and also hear a recording that explains the problems they faced with each other? I think the ending is ambiguous in that it's unclear whether they'll repeat the same mistakes again, but at least they have insight into what went wrong this time (minus the emotional damage), so there's a glimmer of hope. But that's kind of irrelevant to my question, since in my hypothetical my ex wouldn't be undergoing the same procedure. And if he did, I think it's unlikely we'd ever hook up again, though it would be funny if we did. Weird to think about. You guys have sort of convinced me of the pitfalls in my original thinking, though.
Username37 Posted June 21, 2010 Posted June 21, 2010 I love Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. It reminds me so much of my first relationship. And it was my ex's and I's favorite movie. As for erasing memories, no I would not. We had so many great memories that now make me smile and tear up a little and as it went down, she began to change and her views on relationships changed. No joke, I spoke to my ex-girlfriend after the break up, and the first thing she said was "I hope you won't erase me." haha She's a different girl. Someone that I would not date if I just met her. I'll always remember the old her. But she'll never come back.
Author shadowplay Posted June 21, 2010 Author Posted June 21, 2010 Hearing the responses to this thread and rereading the wiki page on the movie, I'm realizing that my initial interpretation of the movie when I saw it a few years ago was more positive than the writer/director may have intended. But it also makes it more interesting and insightful. I saw a more hopeful ending, where there was a good chance of them having learned from their mistakes. I think the never ending cycle may be closer to the truth. It's kind of depressing and cynical.
Toki Posted June 22, 2010 Posted June 22, 2010 At the end of the day all you have left is your memories, if erasing the memories of my ex would help, I might as well erase every other bad memory, and there's plenty of them that happened previous to my relationship ending. I wouldn't have any respect for someone who would willingly erase their memories, because they also lose accountability.
sedgwick Posted June 22, 2010 Posted June 22, 2010 For sure I'd do it. Any positive memories I have of him are BY FAR outweighed by the pain of the last three years.
Dexter Morgan Posted June 22, 2010 Posted June 22, 2010 If you've seen the movie, would you do it? No, I wouldn't do it. I wouldn't want to unknowingly hook up with the bitch later on:cool:
Nikki Sahagin Posted June 22, 2010 Posted June 22, 2010 I wouldn't. There have been times when I have thought I might like to, but he gave me some of the most wonderful memories and experiences of my life. If I never know love again, at least i've known it once. I could never erase my experience of love whether it worked out or didn't, because its such a precious and rare thing that not everybody gets to experience.
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