Darth Vader Posted June 27, 2010 Posted June 27, 2010 Dump her like she was yesterdays trash ~ because that's what she is. TRASH when it comes to being in a relationship. (And legal disclaimer ~ men can be and are trash themselves) And the worse of it is that she cheated on you with someone that got locked up and in jail? I watch "Cops" sometimes and I cannot even belive some of these "losers" that are going to jail for some of the stupid and idoitic things they do. (Sidebar? Have you ever noticied that the white guys pretty much get "cuffed" and agree they FU? The black guys involves a five mile car chase, them bailing, runnning for five hundred yards before getting taking down and cuffed asking "What did I do?" But the women? Be they black, white, Hispanic ~ mattersd not ~ its going to take four or five Cops to put her in the back of a patrol car? Even then they're trying to kick out the windows of the patoral car? You know why it takes that many with women Gunny? Sexual Harassment! No Cop want's to risk losing their badge until there's at least four or five fellow cop witnesses right there to back em up! That's just being smart!
Darth Vader Posted June 27, 2010 Posted June 27, 2010 she doesn't really have any reason to stop her cheating, who is wearing pants in this R,it's definitely not you....get some balls or lend some but get rid of her.....if there is any thing you can blame it is YOU.....get that annulment ASAP....anyways what is that you wanted to discuss with her...get off the drugs ASAP PLEASE MAN! LEAVE THIS MONSTER! SHE'S ONLY IN IT FOR HERSELF AND WHAT SHE CAN GET OUT OF YOU! WE'RE ALL TRYING TO HELP YOU, BUT WE CAN'T DO IT FOR YOU, YOU HAVE TO DO IT FOR YOURSELF! YOU CAN'T CHANGE WHO SHE REALLY IS, THE GIRL OR WHATEVER YOU MARRIED IS WHO SHE REALLY IS, A LIAR AND A CHEATER, SHE'LL NEVER CHANGE, IT'LL BE HER UNDOING, SHE'LL DESTROY HERSELF AND YOU (if you stay with her) IN THE PROCESS!!! SHE'LL NEVER GET HELP, OR WANT IT!!!!!! I hate typing that way, but COME ON MAN!!!! WAKE UP!!!! Get out NOW and SAVE YOURSELF before it's TOO LATE!!! I'm really serious here MAN! You can see that we're showing you a lot more love here (don't get any ideas buddy!:lmao:) than she ever would/could!
Author tornandmarried Posted June 27, 2010 Author Posted June 27, 2010 yeah i know.....i DO want out of this, i was foolishly blinded by love and made an irrational and impulsive decesion.....there is other reasons beyond the cheating too i should have taken into consideration......i met a lost and troubled girl, helped her change her life around and when she got it together she didnt need me anymore....the relationship was good for what it was when it was, but marriage, at this point, was a huge mistake.....anybody have an idea of what a divorce should cost?
U2RockZz Posted June 28, 2010 Posted June 28, 2010 it doesn't matter....but it won't take more than your wedding preparation costs,i guess....haven't you seen a lawyer yet....WTF
Author tornandmarried Posted June 28, 2010 Author Posted June 28, 2010 i havent seen a lawyer yet, but i did do alot of research online and found mixed prices for stuff, i called some local places for information....now i need to get up a couple hundred dollars and get it in motion...we talked about it today, she asked me if i regret marrying her, i said no but we proably should have waited....i honestly dont regret it at all, which is weird, it has no possability to even work, but with everything we been through together im proud to know she was once my wife (well see how that way of thinking changes after divorce court)
stillafool Posted June 28, 2010 Posted June 28, 2010 Something tells me if she were to come home and consumate your marriage you would forget about the anullment. Right?
Chrome Barracuda Posted June 28, 2010 Posted June 28, 2010 Her: Do you regret marrying me? ( she cheated twice, probably gave me an std', doing god knows what in god knows what alleyway, with the scumbags and skeezers of the city, Emotionally destroyed you, got married to you and basically used you for what she could get outta it, and never even consumated the marriage to boot.) Your correct statement should have been-> TNS: hell yes I regret marrying you. If i known you was such a whore. i would have put you on the strip so you could start making me some money. Now let pool our money together so we can do a collabrative divorce annullment and you can screw whoever you want and i can be free! ...That's what you should have said.
Author tornandmarried Posted June 28, 2010 Author Posted June 28, 2010 this forum has been very helpful.....nice to see diffrent perspectives of the situation, rather than how i see it in my eyes....would never bash her about it but marying her made me realize how stupid i was for even dating her in the first place...and helped me get over it
Author tornandmarried Posted July 6, 2010 Author Posted July 6, 2010 thought id post an update....still havent seen my wife, she was asking to see me and i tell her no....we talked about divorce and she got mad at me about it...and today she posted alot of pics on her myspace with the guy she first cheated on me with, kissing and cudddling....she swears theyre not doing anything tho lol and she says she posted the pics cuz everyone is acusing her of it and she wanted to piss them off...either way annulment/divorce comming soon
Steadfast Posted July 6, 2010 Posted July 6, 2010 There is a very good chance that you can get this done without paying high legal fees. I hired a paralegal (1/4 of the cost of a lawyer) and a process server. The PL had all the experience of filing and went through it step by step with me, covered all the bases. And that was after 17-years of marriage. You could probably get an annulment drawn up for even less. I seriously doubt she has the money for a lawyer. If she balks, threatens or gets nasty, remind her that you're going easy on her...and if she wants it to get ugly, you'll hire a lawyer and sue for neglect, desertion, emotional abuse, etc, etc. Overwhelm her then give her an easy way out. Sign here. Once the papers are done, change your number, move or stay with a friend, anywhere that she can't find you. Disappear. Communicate through the PL or the courts until everything is final. Go completely NC and try to forget her. I mean this; no games. Let her live with her choices, don't let the mud from her hole slop all over you. If you really want to get better and get on with your life, then you'll do it. It you continue to be drawn into her drama or think you can/should 'help' you're fooling yourself. My divorce is over two years old and I rarely see or talk to my ex. And we have two kids. You can do this man. Turn the wrenches then move on.
listen_to_me_please Posted July 7, 2010 Posted July 7, 2010 (edited) i know what your ex is doing because my ex did it to me. first of all, the girl may have some feelings for you but not allot. she does not respect you and she for whatever reason(s) believe she can do and act how she likes. you have to stop communicating with her, you have to just go NC and when she calls don't pick up, just disappear. while your working on yourself, you have to save the money and get the annulment. then just have it served to her. thats when its going to start hitting home to her, then she's going to beg and plead and when that fails, look for a way to eventually blame you for everything because she doesn't want to admit in the mirror, she has problems. don't let her, its her way of getting rid of the gilt. by you talking to her, your only enabling her, she doesn't respect you anymore, she feels as if she can do whatever she wants and she can "handle you" for lack of a better term. your best option at this point is to avoid her, change your phone number, change your locks, get the annulment, destroy the pictures, and memories, pack up her stuff, put it in a couple of bags and the day the papers are served, tell her to come get her things and be with a friend, while she is getting her things, don't speak to her. its to late for your relationship. its over, everything after this point will just be hurt and pro-long the healing, as evident by her posting the pictures on myspace. in closing, your wife is not a good person for you. she's not having sex with you because she's having sex with someone else. its not "we" anymore, its you and her and she clearly does not love, respect or care about your well being. man up brother, you know what you have to do. just bite the bullet and follow through. Edited July 7, 2010 by listen_to_me_please
Author tornandmarried Posted July 7, 2010 Author Posted July 7, 2010 thanks, nice to hear from somebody thats been through a simular situation...today she told me that guy is moving in with her and she just called me few minutes ago asking me to come to her house and have sex with her, i just avoided the question...she sounded all doped up and got off the phone cuz she was about to puke...no way in hell am i consumating this marriage...no contact is proably the way to go, ill miss our daily 5 minute phone calls but i need to do whats best for me
Author tornandmarried Posted July 15, 2010 Author Posted July 15, 2010 i went to see my wife the other day, hung out at her house for a couple hours...it went well, OM was there looking all jelous when we was sitting together on the couch....seems like shes trying hard to keep up the lie and try to keep me, she even left me a comment on myspace saying she loves me and misses me and shes sorry and wants to work on things...the next day i mailed a money order to a laywer to get the divorce papers started....i kinda feel like i want to work things out but i feel like its a manipulation....she wants to have a husband and a boyfriend, i just cant deal with a girl that runs to another guy everytime we have a problem...so divorce it is....i also forgot to mention the guy shes cheating on me with is her cousin-in law:sick:
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