Adunaphel Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 Are you exclusive? What is the level of commitment for both of you? Do you feel the need to be in an exclusive relationship to have sex? I think sex on the third date is fine if you feel like having sex on the third date... but if you are not exclusive yet, and you cannot handle the idea of a guy losing interest after you have had sex, perhaps it's safer to wait.
Cracker Jack Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 If you want to have sex on the third date, I see no problem with it.
threebyfate Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 It's completely up to you. IMO, great sex is with someone who you mutually care about, trust and respect. Even better, someone who you mutually share love, trust and respect. In either situation, you don't have to worry about whether you're skillful, doing the right thing or . Everything happens so naturally, full of fun and enthusiasm, and is mutually satisfying, again and again. So...net result, unless you feel close to someone emotionally to the above degree, sex on the third date is rarely a mutual thing. Girls are doing it since they believe it's expected of them and have fear of loss. The latter is detrimental to self. Don't believe me? Why can't most women gain orgasm through sexual penile intercourse alone? Guaranteed the problem isn't all physical. As a guess, most of it is emotional.
kdark Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 Perfectly fine as long as both people want to do it, and aren't doing it for the wrong reasons. don't have sex because you feel obligated. Don't have sex because it's the "next step." Have sex because you are horny and want to jump your dates bones.
Engadget Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 As a guy who's looking for "the one", I'd say wait longer unless you're just attracted to the guy and don't see it going that far. The girl I'm with now pushed me into bed on the FIRST date, that will make guys not respect you and see you only as a sex object. I'd wait weeks if you want it to be more meaningful.
Cracker Jack Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 Does anyone else agree that Elmer is a true badass and defines what a real man is?
Engadget Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 wrongo, first date is when to start except for the nice guy who doesnt get squat Don't you have anything better to do than troll?
CLC2008 Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 Don't believe me? Why can't most women gain orgasm through sexual penile intercourse alone? Guaranteed the problem isn't all physical. As a guess, most of it is emotional. I know we've had this arguement before, but the big "O" for a woman remains inconclusive. It can be one or the other or a combination of both (physical anatomy and emotional). We can flip the scenario. How about women who slept with say 50 + partners and can achieve orgasm via penile intercourse each time? A woman who can have sex with a complete stranger and orgasm through penile intercourse with no problem. Or women who can only orgasm with their partner via penile penetration. What do we say about a woman in those circumstances from an "emotional" stand point? Would you say that they lack emotion?
kdark Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 As a guy who's looking for "the one", I'd say wait longer unless you're just attracted to the guy and don't see it going that far. The girl I'm with now pushed me into bed on the FIRST date, that will make guys not respect you and see you only as a sex object. I'd wait weeks if you want it to be more meaningful. If you didn't want to have sex on the first date, why did you let her push you into it? It's pretty hippocritical of you to have sex with a girl on a first date, and then only judge her later on down the road, and not yourself. It takes two to tango.
Engadget Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 If you didn't want to have sex on the first date, why did you let her push you into it? It's pretty hippocritical of you to have sex with a girl on a first date, and then only judge her later on down the road, and not yourself. It takes two to tango. I tried to talk her out of it, but I was horny and it had been some time so I eventually gave in. I was never planning on dating her, I'm just telling you an undeniable truth. Have sex with a guy quick, and you lose that "get to know you" phase that should be accomplished before sex.
CLC2008 Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 Have sex with a guy quick, and you lose that "get to know you" phase that should be accomplished before sex. I suppose my sister and her husband are still getting to know each other then since they've been together now for 10 years.
Engadget Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 I suppose my sister and her husband are still getting to know each other then since they've been together now for 10 years. It happening once in a while doesn't make me not right, because trust me. What I'm saying is true. If you allow most guys in your pants right away, you lose the respect that comes with holding out. You also make us think you'll jump into bed with anyone right away, and for many that makes a relationship impossible.
jamal Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 (edited) I normally go for sex on the first date. Failure that then second date. No third date if I do not get between her legs. Chances are that she is not a virgin and if she was able to give it to some past jerk boyfriend why can she not give it to me when I have not treated her bad. BTW, I am not a judgmental person so I will not judge a woman based on her having slept with me on the first date. Rather, I take the time to get to know her and I find that sex break down the tension and false impression. People are more willing to relax and show you their true self after sex. As a matter of fact, my wife of 8 years was a first date lay. She was no skunk but a very loyal and moral woman. In fact, all my long term relationships have been sex on the first date. Even though I broke up with some of these girls (sex wasnt part of the decision) I still have tremendous respect for them and even chat with them on FB. I find the friendship very fulfilling since I do not harbour any sexual fantasies about them (been there done that). The same can not be said about a friendship with a girl I have not screwed. Lets face it. Whats the point of a 25-45 year old woman pretending to be some Amish girl when she probably has been humped by a number of guys. This will not help her regain her virginity. For me, the older the woman the more it annoys me when she starts acting all prudish. Edited June 19, 2010 by jamal
CLC2008 Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 It happening once in a while doesn't make me not right, because trust me. What I'm saying is true. If you allow most guys in your pants right away, you lose the respect that comes with holding out. You also make us think you'll jump into bed with anyone right away, and for many that makes a relationship impossible. I don't suggest that it's right either and/or that people should. My point is that she married a great guy who is respectul, honest and decent. I suppose that's my point, really.
kdark Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 I tried to talk her out of it, but I was horny and it had been some time so I eventually gave in. I was never planning on dating her, I'm just telling you an undeniable truth. Have sex with a guy quick, and you lose that "get to know you" phase that should be accomplished before sex. It's not an undeniable truth since I'm a guy, and I don't do it. And the get know you phase can be accomplished after sex, as well as before.
Engadget Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 It's not an undeniable truth since I'm a guy, and I don't do it. And the get know you phase can be accomplished after sex, as well as before. It's not the same, at all.
ADF Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 If you want to, sure. The best relationship I ever had started out as a drunken one night stand. We ended up being together for 6 years.
kdark Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 It happening once in a while doesn't make me not right, because trust me. What I'm saying is true. If you allow most guys in your pants right away, you lose the respect that comes with holding out. You also make us think you'll jump into bed with anyone right away, and for many that makes a relationship impossible. Those guys who lose respect for a woman if she has sex on the first date are just insecure and can't handle a girl who really enjoys sex. You don't think you have what it takes to hold onto a girl who sleeps with you on the first date?
Engadget Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 Those guys who lose respect for a woman if she has sex on the first date are just insecure and can't handle a girl who really enjoys sex. You don't think you have what it takes to hold onto a girl who sleeps with you on the first date? Nope, but I'm going to think she's a bit promiscuous and ultimately not respect her.
kdark Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 It's not the same, at all. You know you're right. If we have sex early then I can stop worrying about whether or not she is a prude and just enjoy my time with her, because I can't date someone who doesn't enjoy sex as much as me.
Engadget Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 You know you're right. If we have sex early then I can stop worrying about whether or not she is a prude and just enjoy my time with her, because I can't date someone who doesn't enjoy sex as much as me. Perhaps people who are actually looking for more than just sex think like me, I don't know. I'd never date a girl that ****s me the first night, ever. Have some respect for yourself and hold out a bit for ****s sake.
jamal Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 It's not the same, at all. Yes it is not the same. Actually it is better. After sex people are more relaxed and all that faking goes through the window. In my experience, women are more likely to believe what you tell them after sex since they know that you are not BSing just to get into their pants. I have told women I like that I genuinely like them and if I did not then I would have just moved on once I got laid. This has convinced them that it is not just the sex that I am after. I have even told another woman that we can stop having sex and take the time to get to know each other - to prove that I was not just after sex. Anyway, early sex shows a woman you are a man who knows what he wants and is not afraid to pursue it.
CLC2008 Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 Nope, but I'm going to think she's a bit promiscuous and ultimately not respect her. So then why would you continue sleeping with someone you didn't respect?
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