Jump to content

What's a relationship supposed to be?


While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

Recommended Posts

Posted

Why is that my gf always love to say ugly things about me?

Like saying you're an idiot, you're an *******, you're stupid, you're idiotic.

 

Is it supposed to be like that in a relationship? Sometimes i think my patience is going to wear out one day. We have been together for a year plus. And yes, i supposed things wont be as sweet as of that the start. But sometimes, isn't it abit too much to keep saying such things towards your bf?

 

And i heard about your gf being twice of that when you two get married. If she's already like that right now, what's going to happen when we get married? She's the one that loves to say such things to diss me off. like seriously wtf?

Posted

No man or woman should take that kind of abuse from their partner -- ever!

  • Author
Posted
No man or woman should take that kind of abuse from their partner -- ever!

 

Really? what do you mean? so how do i put it across to her? Sometimes, everything is going well, and she just has to say something like you're just being you. You're just an idiot. that sort. ****. im really sick of that crap.

Posted
Is it supposed to be like that in a relationship?

 

NO.

 

She doesn't respect you and you need to stop calling her your gf. A women who loves you would never put you down like that.

  • Author
Posted
NO.

 

She doesn't respect you and you need to stop calling her your gf. A women who loves you would never put you down like that.

 

To her, respect has to be earned. And apparently i did alot of things that hurt her in the past. But does that give her the right to do so? i dont think so. She did things that hurt me, but i have never spoken to her like that.

 

But my point is, what to do now? Talk to her about it? but she's freaking strong headed. To her, she's right like almost everytime. And if i talk to her about this, most probably she's going to talk about breaking up, and me not loving her for who she is.

Posted

What kind of man puts up with a woman like that?

 

Are you insecure as a person?

 

If you don't want the c---- than don't take any. It isn't like anyone's forcing you to be with her, and you're surely not an animal being tied to her.

Posted
Really? what do you mean? so how do i put it across to her? Sometimes, everything is going well, and she just has to say something like you're just being you. You're just an idiot. that sort. ****. im really sick of that crap.

 

When I was 20 -- this is something that it's hard for me to forget, I got over him but not the things he said -- I dated a guy that was emotionally abusive. At first, he was nice but after a month or so, he started calling me names and whenever we argue, he'd say the things your gf says to you. I had enough of that after almost a year. Yes, I was stupid for putting up with that. I decided enough was enough. Never have I gone out with any guy like him ever again!

 

None of my bfs after that abusive guy has ever said anything like "you're such idiot!" -- not even in a joking way. Maybe some people can take it in a joking way, but not me. I would not put up with it.

 

You need to tell her it's not cool at all. Just be straight about it.

  • Author
Posted

Really? Am i the one that's being too patient with her? She using words like **** off when she's angry. To her, it's about whose being right, and whose being wrong. But to me, i feel that that don't even give you the right to use such words against your partners.

 

Damn. It's not that i'm insecure, but i know that there are many things that i have done that hurt her. I thought i was just being nice by tolerating all this because of the past wrongs.

Posted

Even if you did a lot of wrongs in the past, does not give her the right to call you names. My ex did a lot of hurtful things but I didn't call him names -- I left.

  • Author
Posted

So what's the best for me to do? Talk it over?

Posted
So what's the best for me to do? Talk it over?

 

Of course you can talk it over with her but if you expect her to change, I doubt it.

  • Author
Posted

Then that's to say the only way is to leave her?

Posted
but i know that there are many things that i have done that hurt her

 

Is this true or are u just justifing her behavior?

 

People who emotionally abuse people don't change unless they want to. Were you abusive to her?

Posted
Then that's to say the only way is to leave her?

 

Talk to your gf first, blurry. See how you both can work this out.

  • Author
Posted
Talk to your gf first, blurry. See how you both can work this out.

 

No, i wasn't abusive to her. In fact i was never.

 

i have no idea man. But i know her strong headedness and persistence in her stand makes it hard for this relationship to work out. Prior to this, i am a little immature as compared to her.

 

It's not that she's a bad girl. She's a great girl. She buys dinner for me, she's willing to stand by me through good times and bad times. But it's just that during the bad times, she gets a little too "off".

Posted

If your not happy then it's time to evaluate your relationship.

 

If you talk to her and let her know you will not tolerate her talking to you that way and she continues then it's time to walk.

Posted

Anyone who talks down to you isnt worth your time! There are good relationships filled with respect and love, dont waste your time in one that only makes you feel bad!

  • Author
Posted

I totally have no idea. She loves to do things that puts me down, and that after that gets angry about me being angry for it? And so many times, she says that im petty because i should be the one getting used to her saying such words like stupid, idiotic because she dont truly meant it? WTF?

Posted

You can never know the answers to all that if you do not talk to her, blurry. Get her to sit down with you and talk about this.

 

I agree with Yamaha that it's time to re-evaluate your relationship.

×
×
  • Create New...