Blindeyes Posted June 18, 2010 Posted June 18, 2010 Should I feel guilty? It has never gotten better for me, despite the changes I have made. Yes, I do want to die!! I cannot take this last rejection…it is burning me. Why is he so happy? How could he just leave me alone without warning? I have to drive by him every day and I see him outside of his shop…laughing and enjoying himself. He just got a new car (Mercedes Benz SUV) he looks so happy. He told me he loved me up until the day he just stopped calling me. It’s been about a month. Why doesn’t he care that he hurt me. Every day is a living hell for me. I want to call him so bad but feel stupid knowing that if he wanted to talk to me…he would call. Do you know what it feels like to walk around with a gulp in your throat and a serious feeling of emptiness. I know they say it will get better etc etc etc…what will get better? I just want to know how someone could just act like the past year and a half never existed. What does “I love you” mean again?
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