bayouboi Posted June 18, 2010 Posted June 18, 2010 Of course, if he had called immediately she probably wouldn't be as interested in him. Perhaps I'm mistaken, but this sounds exactly like what my female friends do constantly. Day 0: Give their number to guy Day 1: Talk to friends: "eh, he was okay, I dont know if I'm really interested and definitely not going to sleep with him" Day 3: Why hasn't he called yet? We really had a connection Day 5: This is BULL**** I want him so bad if he calls im going to bang his brains out. This is where I'd put my $ also.
Author Lishy Posted June 18, 2010 Author Posted June 18, 2010 This dating game is just so frustrating! I just went on my Facebook and some guy I met at a wedding after years of not seeing him asked me out! He is such a nice guy but there is no chemistry there for me! I felt so bad knocking him back and I know how he feels too! Damn
bayouboi Posted June 18, 2010 Posted June 18, 2010 This dating game is just so frustrating! I just went on my Facebook and some guy I met at a wedding after years of not seeing him asked me out! He is such a nice guy but there is no chemistry there for me! I felt so bad knocking him back and I know how he feels too! Damn :lmao:lol:lmao:
Author Lishy Posted June 18, 2010 Author Posted June 18, 2010 yeah I know I know! Let me tell you the chemistry was off the wall with the Saturday guy! I could have ripped his clothes off and shagged him on the dancefloor hahaha
fishtaco Posted June 18, 2010 Posted June 18, 2010 If he's the type of guy with no options, you wouldn't be interested in him, not even temporarily. If you think he's cute or whatever, trust me, there are other women that also think he's cute. He has options, and there's nothing wrong with that, I'm sure you have options too. Just chill, there's no need to over think this. If he's interested, he'll contact you. If you're still interested, respond. If not, don't. I know a lot of women are against being aggressive in the pursuit. Some men too I guess. But I see nothing wrong with that. If you're really interested, why don't you contact him? Of course in this case all these people will chime in and say, no way! then you'll appear desperate blah blah blah. Well, isn't he faced with the same decision? Contacting early = desperation or some other bad stuff? If everyone want to play these type of if-I-do-this-then-it-means-that type of mind games, then game on. Don't be surprised if the other side is doing the exact same thing.
AD1980 Posted June 18, 2010 Posted June 18, 2010 yeah I know I know! Let me tell you the chemistry was off the wall with the Saturday guy! I could have ripped his clothes off and shagged him on the dancefloor hahaha I think your confusing wow hes so hot with "chemistry" because apparently this guy didnt feel any magic in your conversation..
Author Lishy Posted June 18, 2010 Author Posted June 18, 2010 I think your confusing wow hes so hot with "chemistry" because apparently this guy didnt feel any magic in your conversation.. Yes you are right, I am a boring egocentric insecure woman No one will want me as I am just too into myself and full of my own self importance, I also dont know how to read signals and think I am hot but really I am a boring cow I understand me now thanks
AD1980 Posted June 18, 2010 Posted June 18, 2010 Yes you are right, I am a boring egocentric insecure woman No one will want me as I am just too into myself and full of my own self importance, I also dont know how to read signals and think I am hot but really I am a boring cow I understand me now thanks No problem somebody had to alert you of this:) J/K My point is in hindsight was the convo with this dbag really that great or was he hot and the "lust" you felt at the moment you mistook for chemistry? Because if you two connected like you claim youd think you would get a call back..
fishtaco Posted June 18, 2010 Posted June 18, 2010 I have to disagree here. I wouldn't say Lishy misread anything. There are many many other factors involved that are way more likely. As discussed earlier, the most likely possibility is the guy has other options. Big deal, I'm sure Lishy does too. But this sort of hot and cold behavior is painfully common in the dating scene. Just because cold happened doesn't mean it wasn't hot before. It also doesn't mean it won't get hot again later. It's all part of dating.
marlena Posted June 18, 2010 Posted June 18, 2010 Hi Lishy, I've missed seeing you around here. There could be a million and one reasons. Try not to speculate what it could be. That kind of thing can drive you batty! Just shrug it off and go about business as usual. He might call and all this stressing out will have been for nothing!
PJKino Posted June 18, 2010 Posted June 18, 2010 If he's the type of guy with no options, you wouldn't be interested in him, not even temporarily. Which proves the point women desire a Man that other women desire.God forbid a guy doesnt have women drapped all over him
Author Lishy Posted June 18, 2010 Author Posted June 18, 2010 Hey lovely Marlena!!!!!! I have not been here for a while honey! Missed you too xx I am not imagining our connection, I have never laughed so much in so few hours and he was having a ball too! That is why I am so perplexed that he did not call although I cant shake the feeling that he will call and I am normally negative about things like this
marlena Posted June 18, 2010 Posted June 18, 2010 Hey lovely Marlena!!!!!! I have not been here for a while honey! Missed you too xx I am not imagining our connection, I have never laughed so much in so few hours and he was having a ball too! That is why I am so perplexed that he did not call although I cant shake the feeling that he will call and I am normally negative about things like this It's still early days yet. Hope but do not obssess over this. OK?
marlena Posted June 18, 2010 Posted June 18, 2010 I will be ok by Monday babe xx Yes, that's how long it would take me as well! :laugh:
Author Lishy Posted June 18, 2010 Author Posted June 18, 2010 haha yeah I am just having a pity party all by myself but I will live
fishtaco Posted June 18, 2010 Posted June 18, 2010 Which proves the point women desire a Man that other women desire.God forbid a guy doesnt have women drapped all over him That's one way of looking at it. But the more basic math is it is very unlikely that the man Lishy is interested in, is at the bottom of the barrel and no other women would even be interested in. But it is true, women like men that other women like. Having women around you with ambiguous "friendliness" certainly gets you more attention than if you were alone or with a bunch of guys. Wingwomen are extremely effective tools even if they just hang around you and know when to disappear.
ADF Posted June 18, 2010 Posted June 18, 2010 Yeah I am sure I was the only number he got that night as he spent the night talking to me and left the bar with me and went to another club where he spent all his time with me and then shared a cab home Oh, I'm sorry. Well, what I meant was that you shouldn't see it as a rejection of you in particular. This guy probably pulls this kind of crap semi-regularly. You did nothing wrong.
Author Lishy Posted June 18, 2010 Author Posted June 18, 2010 I guess I am just feeling a bit rejected and some of the comments here just added to my feeling of rejection - Sorry if I was a bit narky :/
2sunny Posted June 18, 2010 Posted June 18, 2010 a guy like that most likely has a gal he's been dating. did he state why he may have been out that night? who was he there with? could it be that he took your number in case he intends to break up with someone he's currently seeing and he's waiting until he available to call? if this might be it - he is doing things in proper order and they do take a bit of time. it sure beats a guy that has a girlfriend now and tries to see you on the sly... give it some time. things work out the way they're supposed to. in the meantime - get out there being busy and having fun!
janie423 Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 (edited) yea i did this a few weeks ago. this older cougar was hitting on me all night and since she looked ok with my 5-beer goggles on i asked for her business card. she readily coughed it up. the next morning i woke up sober and realized that she was too old for me even though she was relatively attractive....and she still had kids at home. so i decided to throw away her card and did not contact her... some day in what will seem like the very near future some rube will refer to you as this older perv or other degrading remark and that will be the point at which your karma will be staring you back in the face . . . Edited June 19, 2010 by janie423
Engadget Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 some day in what will seem like the very near future some rube will refer to you as this older perv or other degrading remark and that will be the point at which your karma will be staring you back in the face . . . Is what he said really offensive? As for the OP: 1. The guy wasn't that into you, just wanted to be nice. I've done this. 2. He wants to collect numbers as trophies, "Yo dude, I got 10 numbers last night!" 3. He's gay Those are the only reasons I can actually think of
janie423 Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 (edited) Is what he said really offensive? It is quite offensive. Total objectification of another human being, placed into a category based on her demographic. Cold as ice. No human reference at all in his descriptive. And yeah OP don't take this personally. Men use women to prop up their egos all the time. Don't waste a minute thinking about this guy. Edited June 19, 2010 by janie423
bac Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 Yeah I am sure I was the only number he got that night as he spent the night talking to me and left the bar with me and went to another club where he spent all his time with me and then shared a cab home Perhaps, you had expectations that he was a nice hot guy who was looking for a passionate relationship with a beautiful woman. Anyway, there is a chance that he might be a guy who was looking for ONS or FWBs with any woman. From what I am reading above, I assume that he was with you all the night mostly paying for alcohol drinks for you. From my experience, it means that his intention was to have sex right away, that is why guys spend money on drinks. If I am close to being right, he was very upset with your behavior, if you did not invite him to your place. He felt rejected and regreted spending money in vain. He was horny and upset. Then, he gave it some thinking and thought that you might be not easy, you might want a relationship and you might make him waste his money again. Strangely, some guys believe that they are entitled on ONSs after buying drinks in bars. IMO, you can have the guy, if you agree to accept him for who he is. He is not a relationship material, but, he is a great ONS material. So, to have the guy, you might want to let him know that you are easy and you are interested in casual, short-term sex. For that purporse, you text him that you would love to invite him for a dinner to your place or something else that he would interpret as having sex for sure with you right away. IMO you are not that type of girl who would want to do that. But, keep in mind that you can always have him easily if you can offer him what he wants.
Yamaha Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 IMO, you can have the guy, if you agree to accept him for who he is. He is not a relationship material, but, he is a great ONS material Bingo. What was it you were looking 4? You talked about shagging him on the dance floor. Was that your only interest or were you hoping he was interested in dating you?
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