Married_and_Lonely Posted June 17, 2010 Posted June 17, 2010 I haven't officially been diagnosed with OCD, but I think I definitely have some obsessive compulsive tendencies. Do any of you struggle with obsessing over your unhappiness in your marriage or your sex life? I have trouble concentrating at work even because I obsess much of almost every day on my unhappiness in my marriage and this feeling that I'm stuck in a bad situation with no real answer. How do you prevent yourself from obsessing over unhealthly thoughts without the use of perscription drugs? I don't need any more medication going into my body.
xxoo Posted June 18, 2010 Posted June 18, 2010 I think you'd get more responses on a health forum, as this is primarily a mental health issue. In fact, that is an important distinction to consider: how much of your marital unhappiness is the effect of your OCD? How much is your OCD aggravated by an unhappy marriage? Do you feel that you can accurately assess the reality of your relationship at this point, or is your perception too filtered through the OCD lens? See a healthcare professional. There may be non-prescription treatment options available to you, or a pill may change your ENTIRE outlook enough to be very worth the extra med. Please don't suffer needlessly.
Crazy Magnet Posted June 18, 2010 Posted June 18, 2010 To be OCD you must not only have the obsessions, but also the compulsions. You can't just have one or the other. You have more ruminating thoughts. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is one way to deal with these types of thoughts without medication. You will need to seek a trained professional, preferably one that specializes in CBT.
MsRight Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 I definitely do. I obsess about a lot of things, and it has manifested itself in compulsions, everything from binge eating to not being able to stop playing solitaire for like 6 hours straight. I am in treatment for it, but it has disrupted my life. I recently got out of an affair and am still obsessing (and failing to control compulsions) about it. I still obsess over my M even though my H is perfect, and he is going to MC with me, although it is quickly becoming obvious that he has done his part and any remaining failing is on my part. I obsess so much my own IC told me - You are thinking about this too much! I have always considered myself "introspective" and "philosophical" but now it's just tormenting. I echo Crazy Magnet on the compulsions. Maybe you are just introspective. For me, and for someone with OCD, the compulsions may or may not be linked to what you have anxiety/obsession about, but no matter what, the compulsion calms those anxieties. Like for me, eating felt so good, or when I played solitaire, it relieved my mind of the obsessive thoughts and made me feel more relaxed. I have not come nearly as far as I'd like in IC, but I sure as heck am glad I am doing it!
george44 Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 Do any of you struggle with obsessing over your unhappiness in your marriage or your sex life? I have trouble concentrating at work even because I obsess much of almost every day on my unhappiness in my marriage and this feeling that I'm stuck in a bad situation with no real answer. I do this a lot. However, I'm not sure it's a sympton of OCD. Why don't you find an online OCD quiz and find out how you rate. Perhaps the reason you obsess over your unhappiness in your marriage is justied. Perhaps you should get a divorce.
lonelyandfrustrated Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 Perhaps the reason you obsess over your unhappiness in your marriage is justied. Perhaps you should get a divorce. Or, I dunno, address the problems? Not as easy as divorce, though, but more thorough.
anaisherenow Posted June 19, 2010 Posted June 19, 2010 To be OCD you must not only have the obsessions, but also the compulsions. You can't just have one or the other. You have more ruminating thoughts. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is one way to deal with these types of thoughts without medication. You will need to seek a trained professional, preferably one that specializes in CBT. Please be aware of the disorder before you say what is and isn't OCD. This statement is untrue. There is something called purely obsessional obsessive compulsive disorder (or pure-o). I know because I have it and it is a recognized form of OCD. It's a bit of a misnomer because we don't have physical compulsions, but rather mental ones. Checking, reassurance-seeking... Anyhow, depending on your response to your ruminations, it is OCD. My OCD is about my relationship - whether it's right, whether there's enough (or any) love, whether I'm happy enough with him... That's called ROCD. Go to http://stuckinadorway.org - if OCD's the problem, you're better off there. There are many resources available, including therapy (ERP is the most recommended course).
Author Married_and_Lonely Posted June 21, 2010 Author Posted June 21, 2010 Thanks for the replies - I should have known better considering the forum and the serious topics on here, but I probably throw around "OCD" a little too loosely. I don't think I'm obsessive or compulsive, but sometimes I just wish I could put my head in the sand so-to-speak and block out my marriage problems from my thoughts. I'm easily distracted at work lately because my work load has significantly decreased the last couple years and I end up using alot of that extra time thinking about my marriage issues and reading online about other people with the same issues. During football season, pro football and fantasy football become my obsession (oops, used that word again).
george44 Posted June 21, 2010 Posted June 21, 2010 Originally Posted by george44 Perhaps the reason you obsess over your unhappiness in your marriage is justied. Perhaps you should get a divorce. Or, I dunno, address the problems? Not as easy as divorce, though, but more thorough. Or, you could spend years addressing the problems, never get over the unhappiness and then wish you hadn't wasted years of your life being unhappy. Been there, done that.
xxoo Posted June 21, 2010 Posted June 21, 2010 . During football season, pro football and fantasy football become my obsession (oops, used that word again). It sounds like you could benefit from a healthy hobby! Take up a class, train for a marathon, etc.
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