Barney Rubble Posted June 17, 2010 Posted June 17, 2010 I am a professional, married man..49 years old. Through people moving through the years, I was down to one close friend. Then she (strictly platonic) started acting cold towards me and now that appears to be done with..although I have tried to talk to her, she refuses. Anyways, I have no idea how to make new friends at this age. The people I know at work and in the activities I do seem not to be interested. They have their friend circle and don't seem to want to expand it. Now my wife and I do have some "couple friends" and she has her friends, but I am basically friendless and that needs to change for my sanity. Someone to go to a movie with (especially the ones my wife won't go to), watch the game at the pub, or go to a hockey or football game. Any ideas how to find friends at this age? Thanks
Tayla Posted June 18, 2010 Posted June 18, 2010 Accentuate your positives that enabled you to have friends at each stage of life. Find areas that are new and of interest to you ...I joined a book club and was fascinated by folks, we didnt look at age so much as were intrigued at the perceptions of the books or its characters. Gained a respect for the differences and have *social* friends from it. Some of us now go out bowling afterwards (which we aren't good at but gosh what fun anyways!) Or we grab a bite to eat somewhere and chat over current matters. Check your papers for community events ....
lovingone Posted June 18, 2010 Posted June 18, 2010 I've never been married. I always assumed that if you had a spouse (or spouse and kids) and a good relationship with them, you were set. Your spouse is the only one in you life who 80% of the time ( I don't believe spouses just "take off" very often) requires legal proceedings to get out of your life unless you have minor children that request it. That is a pretty powerful bond. And to tell the truth, any friend you make that is married/attached, has kids, or both will put those people before you because that is that nature of those relationships. Maybe I am just talking out of my butt as someone who is sparse in both the friend and lover department right now. I got a best friend of almost 25 years but she lives a 7 hour drive from me and all attempts at one of us moving have failed. I also have a "former classmate" who moved back into my neighborhood who will do something with me only if I initiate. And I internet date casually. But I understand, you need a buddy. I know their are friendships sites that run like dating services for women. Try Googling something like that for men. Or try meetup.com. It is a directory where you can find people in your area looking to form various groups based on interest. Or start a group of your own.
Kentucky Jelly Posted June 21, 2010 Posted June 21, 2010 I have found most of my friends through my hobbies. For example I don't think I hang out with anyone regularly who does not hunt or fish. Never planned it that way, it just seems like that is the way things worked out. What are your hobbies? Can you somehow turn them into a friend meeting opportunity?
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