Confused Individual seeks advice - Why is she playing with my mind?

[twistedheaven]

No offence, but i dont hold your opinions too highly, ive seen your posts. and tough love just doesnt work. You are just as confused by women as i am.

 

The only way we learn in life is if we experience it, take chances.

 

Every woman is not the same, there may be a chance, there may not, but either way, it will be my choice.

 

If i get burnt, so what, life is full of dissapointments, emotional, mental, phsyical etc.

 

She and her ex are having dinner on sunday night, to discuss things, because she still wants to be friends with him, i fear that she might get back with him, i just want her to know that i am here for her, that she doesnt have to be with that tool.

 

I know she expects me to do something, if i dont, will she be dissapointed? If i do... who knows.

 

ARGH ITS ALL SO CONFUSING, TAKE ME AWAY TO THE CLOUDSS!!!!!!!!!

[BlockHead]

monkey00

most of the time girls dont realize what they're doing to guys...it's just natural for them to act like bitches most of the time.

They either don’t want to think about it, or they just don’t care. I noticed that many seem to be preoccupied with the appearance of maturity as opposed to actually being mature. I guess sophistication is one of their methods.

monkey00

e.g. you're at a bar and a girl asks if you can buy her a drink, you agree to....GAME OVER this was a filter to see how easily she can control you or step on you like a doormat.

More than likely, she would take the drink and walk away.

What could she be thinking?

1. He failed the test.

2. Thanks for the drink sucker.

3. An offering for my greatness.

4. … just hormones

twistedheaven

Every woman is not the same, there may be a chance, there may not, but either way, it will be my choice.

There isn’t much originality in stupidity and ignorance. These are the same games being played over and over.

twistedheaven

If i get burnt, so what, life is full of dissapointments, emotional, mental, phsyical etc.

Why waste your time, money, energy, and emotions? They are limited.

twistedheaven

She and her ex are having dinner on sunday night, to discuss things, because she still wants to be friends with him, i fear that she might get back with him, i just want her to know that i am here for her, that she doesnt have to be with that tool.

More games! Will she ever learn? She played games with him, and she used him to play games with others.

[monkey00]

Blockhead: you're a good man, we think like normal, at least someone here on this forum understands what i speak of!!

 

alright, you said you're gonna be there for her as a friend...that's cool, there's no problem with that.

 

but if you're gonna reconfess your feelings again and ask her for a date, well that's just a different ball game there.

 

bah do what you will, this learning experience of the dating game and tests , will (hopefully) teach you a thing or 2 about women.

 

just crash and burn buddy, like i have, how do you think i corrected my errors, and refined my attitudes and way in dealing with women?

 

i guess everyone's gotta crash and burn at least once by a woman to learn their faults, i hope you do.

 

 

p.s., you mentioned in a previous post where you were ignoring her and doing your own thing, YOU SAW THE POSITIVE RESULTS OF THAT. she would glance over at you every once in a while did she not? if that didnt teach you anything, i guess you just gotta let her break your heart first till you learn anything....

 

just my 2 cents, adios

[twistedheaven]

im ready to be burned. This is something that i need to do.

 

Thanks for your opinions and help guys.

[BlockHead]

twistedheaven

im ready to be burned.

This is like saying that you are ready for a sucker punch. Could anybody be ready for one?

 

Some people like to build up a person before tearing that person down. Don’t invest too much emotion if she comes on strong. If it is too good to be true, it probably is.

[julieg]

i am definately not taking sides but i do not see her as malicious toward you and men in general. she is just totally selfish and immature. she is used to having lots of attention from men in her life and revels in it. she is not the type of gal who will spend valentines day alone. she definately is going out with her her "ex". take it from one who knows. she is very selective in what she reveals to you. MOVE ON! THERE ARE LOTS of girls looking for a nice guy like you.

[twistedheaven]

I had this prepared to say to her...

 

Rach, happy valentines day! I hoped my feelings would go away but they grow stronger. I wish you felt the same way i do about you, i wish i could say to your face i have fallen in love with you, today is the day all the couples show their love and care for one another, i wish i was doing the same but im alone thinking of you. My feelings will never change, i will always be here for you. I ask you to do me one favour, to look beyond our friendship because i know it leads to something special and true. I want to be with you, i cherish every moment i have with you, i know you want time to your self at this point, just know i am here if you change your mind. Just think about it and give things a chance. Happy Valentines day beautiful xxx

 

This is what i wanted to say on valentines day, but i thought, **** it. She wont appreciate it will she? We talked on the phone last night, she was stressed over her work, i said i missed her, that i wished she felt the same way i did, that i wanted to kiss her. She then said that she'd see me soon enough.

 

 

I dont think ill tell her this, i want to, i really want to, but argh... i dont know, im lost for words.

[monkey00]

Originally posted by julieg

i am definately not taking sides but i do not see her as malicious toward you and men in general. she is just totally selfish and immature. she is used to having lots of attention from men in her life and revels in it. she is not the type of gal who will spend valentines day alone. she definately is going out with her her "ex". take it from one who knows. she is very selective in what she reveals to you. MOVE ON! THERE ARE LOTS of girls looking for a nice guy like you.

 

ahahhaha you heard that?? "nice guy" the actions that you take are already clasified as "nice guy"

and if you remember nice guys just dont finish.

 

what you're about to say sounds all romantically lovey dovey that almost makes me wanna puke.

if it was the old me from last year i would totally support that, but i've learned that confessing your feelings too soon or too much can just scare away a person. have you ever thought about the fact that she'll either ignore you completely cause she doesnt feel the same way, or just step on you like a doormat?

 

as i said, once girls know how you feel about them or feel that "nice guy" tune from you, you'll have no chance. and i can bet if you wrote that letter to any other girl and succeeded with her, she would still lose interest quickly cause of all the nice guy routines you pull all the time.

 

look up the "scarcity principle" on Google.... if you still plan on getting this girl to like you, DONT CONFESS YOUR FEELINGS JUST YET.

[dyermaker]

Originally posted by twistedheaven

I had this prepared to say to her...

 

Rach, happy valentines day! I hoped my feelings would go away but they grow stronger. I wish you felt the same way i do about you, i wish i could say to your face i have fallen in love with you, today is the day all the couples show their love and care for one another, i wish i was doing the same but im alone thinking of you. My feelings will never change, i will always be here for you. I ask you to do me one favour, to look beyond our friendship because i know it leads to something special and true. I want to be with you, i cherish every moment i have with you, i know you want time to your self at this point, just know i am here if you change your mind. Just think about it and give things a chance. Happy Valentines day beautiful xxx

 

This is what i wanted to say on valentines day, but i thought, **** it. She wont appreciate it will she? We talked on the phone last night, she was stressed over her work, i said i missed her, that i wished she felt the same way i did, that i wanted to kiss her. She then said that she'd see me soon enough.

 

 

I dont think ill tell her this, i want to, i really want to, but argh... i dont know, im lost for words.

 

Don't say it, you're spitting on your own grave. Please don't say it, please. No girl would read that and take you back, I promise--words mean nothing to a girl who has broken up with you.

[twistedheaven]

Im not gonna do it, i said to myself, forget it. She aint worth it, and she never will be.

 

I have better things to do in life.

 

I took time last night to think about it, how she treats me, treats others, how she gets in her relationship, what kind of person she is, even though she is attractive, but as a person, she is poor character.

 

I cant believe i was going to say that sappy sh-it.

 

*Takes a beer*

 

Heres to self-control and not letting women run your life.

[monkey00]

Originally posted by twistedheaven

 

 

I took time last night to think about it, how she treats me, treats others, how she gets in her relationship, what kind of person she is, even though she is attractive, but as a person, she is poor character.

 

 

good to see you thinking straight again. when emotions get in the way, men lose their logical thinking habits.

 

ive been through that, i liked this girl last semester, i thought she was perfect. but after i got over her, i saw her true flaws. even tho she was attractive, she also had poor character. she says she doesnt have much friends... hangs out with her cousin + friends most of the time. but it's cause she's doing it to herself...she only calls u up if she needs something, which she did to me in the past. and she doesnt even make an effort to make friends in school...truth is all she cares about is herself. but now i just "NO, im busy". but yea when emotions get in the way, you cant see their true nature and flaws in their character.

[BlockHead]

Here is a little something to cheer you up.

 

http://www.despair.com/persistence.html

[twistedheaven]

lol block

[twistedheaven]

Im so glad i didnt tell her that crap... im in a more sane sense of mind now.

 

She spent the weekend with her 'ex'. I havent talked to her... someone else told me.

 

Its almost certain they are back together, and i dont know how to feel.

 

On the one hand, i say, good luck to him because hes gonna get messed up like an egg falling on the floor and on the other hand, i hope it fails and she is sad... then she can come running back to me and ill just dismiss her like a kid selling cookies.

 

We were sitting in the kitchen, she never batted and eye-lid towards me, but the BF tried to talk to me, i just lifted my head up and gave him a stare like i was going to jump over the table and slit his throat, so he gave up. All my friends could feel the tension in the room, i finished my coffee and walked out, and inthe reflection on the glass door, i could see rachel looking at me as i walked out the room.

 

Im not going to try any more, infact, id rather not see her, because, i cant imagine being her friend, and im not a bad guy, i dont see why i should be treated this way, i deserve better than to be messed with.

 

From now on, ill just try and ignore her because life is better without her in it.

 

Maybe ill keep you guys posted, thanks for all your help and support, it stopped me making a complete fool of myself.

[Darkangelism]

Go get yourself a girl that will like you for you.

[twistedheaven]

Things got complicated and i decided the only way to move on was to get her out of my life for a while and she came and asked me, why i was ignoring her. I told her, "you know how i feel about you, its too hard to be around you to purely be your friend, im fed up of the games you play with me".

 

I said that, and we havent talked since... about 9 days.

 

She tries to make small talk like, "hi" she nudges me and asks what im doing, i just answer quick and painless and carry on with what i have to do being ignorant towards her and getting away as soon as i can. She seems down and unhappy about something, i dont know if its because of me but i feel better and confident that i can move on with things because as most said, she isnt a girl to be involved with but the look on her face when i dont show her any attention at all is terrible.

 

She seems to be getting more friendly with another one of my friends that she didnt really talk to much, now it seems they are together all the time this week, constantly talking and he was on the phone to her for hours the other night, looks like shes found herself another target.

 

In some ways, i cant help but hope she continues trying to talk to me and carry on as friends, but i need time to myself.

 

Im doing the right thing... right?