bad relationship

[Worst guy ever]

I need advice really bad...this is my first time posting anything like this...EVER....& I hope I never have to write something this horrible (in my opinion) ever again. I have been with the same girl for 6 years now.....but....In the past she has F'd me over not once....not twice....but 3 times now. 3 different times she has cheated on me with other people. I Just recently found out 2 more people when we were not together...but let me make this clear...when we werent together it was because I dumped her cheater butt because I couldnt handle it. so she cheats while she just got broken up with...for guess what? Cheating....go figure. Now I have my most deepest reasons for being with her still after all th nonsense....so deep I cant even say it on a forum...I love her with everything..I care so much abut her & when I say that I dont think you understand clear enough...I love her like a deep down family/ the way you love your wife kind of love.I want to make sure she is fed & has clothes..even though I have really bad anxiety & sit at home all day. (reason she gets away with so much) & today was a very rough day for us.....Im sure she' on a forum talking crap about me as fast as I write this. Im sure by now the only thing you are wondering is "why the **** stay with her" my answer "half is I dont even know why" the other half is "people really do work it out & Im starting to think the only reason that I am with her is because she constantly tells me how horrible & disgusted she feels & all she wants to do is be faithful to me & work it out.....5 times YAAAA right.....but I have the worst trust issues because all those people USED to be my friends....Everyone & im not just saying this...I must have hung out with low life people because I have everything & they dont....including her....& they just could not take it. thats what I get for letting my GF have "guy friends" guys dont want to be friends....they just dont.....everyone just wants a "piece of ass" & they will act like a friend until they get it. Now a little info about myself....I think...actually I know.....I am a genuine guy, a seriously 1 of a kind....I think I am a very special person that cares about people & that must be why I stay with her. I dont look/flirt/even speak words to other girls...I dont look at girls naked on the television & I dont want to either.I dont want to cheat & if the oppertunity presented itself I would still not cheat. I cant say I know even 1 person like me..I dont want her to get raped & found dead in a ditch just because "oops sorry I am so permiscuous" I am only 20 years old & after 6 years of being with her knowing what she did to me, I still dont wanna go out & get revenge on her....I dont wanna **** her over & make her feel like she has made me feel many times over. I am a 1 WOMAN MAN. I have no interest in betraying my parter after all the time we have spent together....& she has no excuse why she does it & not 1 time has she told me. I have had to get crazy mad to get the info out of her......which really brakes my heart like I cant even put the feeling into words. Should I keep this relationship going? Can someone explain why someone would be so horrible to such a genuine person that really cares abut them?....the only reason I do is because most likely she is lying & she says "I want to be in a long relationship" me "since when". I hope I dont sound like a basket case because I really do need advice. here is it all summed up....girl cheats....over....& over.....guy forgives out of the deep love in his heart for the person & her well being....she continues to lie & constantly fight & tell me how much of a loser I am because I am anxiety & I cant go out & find work....but....she just says "whatever I did it" "dont bring it up again" How can someone do that.....Please Help

 

I am a great guy "worst guy ever" thats how I feel she thinks about me

[MisUnderstanding]

Leave her and leave her immediately! She does not deserve you whatsoever, she is using you. You apparently feed her, clothe her, probably do her laundry too. You are not a servant, you are a real person!!!

Yes it will hurt, and you probably will cry, and that will probably last for a few weeks, but then you will start feeling better, and most of all, you will feel relieved.